balanced

August 11, 2015 by Tricia Goyer 4 Comments

4 Things to Cut from Your Schedule {Before School Starts}

Does your schedule seem too full? Are you wondering how you’re going to survive the upcoming school year? That’s me. With seven school-aged kids I’m trying to figure out what we can add. I’m also re-evaluating what needs to be cut. God has given each of us 24 hours, and if things are too crazy-busy, it’s a sign something needs to change. And we’re the only ones who can do it.

So before the school year starts, here are four things you need to cut from your schedule. (Also, use these four tips to gauge any activity before you clear a space for it on your calendar!)

1. Cut out anything you said YES to because of guilt…

or because you didn’t want to say no. You know what I’m talking about. You signed up to help at the church . . . because all the other ladies were. You signed up to help with that walk-a-thon because no one else did. Guilt should not be your motivator. God’s directives are usually a still and quiet leading in your heart.

2. Cut out anything that doesn’t work for the season you’re in.

Are there activities or events you used to look forward to but that now seem to be just time-wasters? People grow and change. Kids grow and change. Go through your schedule and interview each activity. Ask, “Why do you need to stay there for THIS season of my life?”

3. Cut out anything your kids aren’t enjoying.

Yes, we often believe all children NEED to play t-ball or take dance lessons, but if they aren’t enjoying it, then why do it? Follow their lead and explore their natural gifts and talents instead.

4. Cut out anything God asks you to.

Sometimes the things we’re asked to cut don’t make sense, yet God knows the future. Last year I felt God tell me to cut out a lot of my writing and blogging commitments. It turns out this year we brought four new girls into our home. Seek God. Ask Him to evaluate your schedule. Listen to His still, small voice, and obey.

What about you? How do you decide what to cut or add to your schedule?

Need more help or ideas? Check out these blogs!

Before the busyness of school kicks in, cut out these 4 things from your schedule! @TriciaGoyer

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Disclosure of Material Connection: Some of the links in the post above are “affiliate links.” This means if you click on the link and purchase the item, I will receive an affiliate commission. Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will add value to my readers. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”

August 4, 2015 by Tricia Goyer Leave a Comment

Being Transparent: 3 Ways To Invite Others Into Your Healing

Years ago, in 2005, I faced one of the hardest struggles of my life. I thought I was doing so well—as a writer, as a mom, and as a wife. One November, I pondered my family, and my work, and I thought things couldn’t get any better. I even prayed Psalm 139:23-24:

Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. Point out anything in me that offends you, and lead me along the path of everlasting life.

God did some searching, and I didn’t like what He found! God showed me ways that I needed healing. He uncovered areas of my life that needed healing.

It started with an email from an old boyfriend, and my heartbeat jumped to my throat. I’d thought about Steven* from time to time but that moment all the 14-year-old emotions came rushing back. I felt like that young teen again who’d found her “first love.” And as I thought about him I became dissatisfied by my current life. (How horrible is that?!)

Even though I broke off all communication with Steven,* in the coming months I still struggled with my emotions. What I realized is that even though Jesus had given me a new life I was still wrapped up in the old graveclothes. My good friend, Joanna Weaver, gives us a good picture of those graveclothes in her book, Lazarus Awakening: Finding Your Place in the Heart of God:

I can’t imagine what it must have been like to see Lazarus shuffle out of the darkness of the tomb, wrapped in thin strips of linen according to the custom of the day. His arms and legs were probably wrapped individually, which allowed some movement. But to say the man was restricted would be an understatement.

The stench of death surely lingered around him. Depending on the original sickness, bloody patches may have marked the burial garment here and there, interspersed with yellow-crusted infection. Though a welcome sight to those who loved him, the resurrected Lazarus might also have been a bit frightening to behold.

I wonder what Mary and Martha thought when Jesus said, “Loose him, and let him go” (John 11:44, nkjv). As happy as I’d be to see my brother alive, I wouldn’t want to touch the strips of linen that had clung to his rotting flesh. After all, who knew what lay beneath the bandages? Just how resurrected was he?

Unwinding graveclothes. It’s a dirty job. But someone has to do it.

Someone has to do it. And that’s one of the factors of Lazarus’ story that shocks me most. For while Jesus Christ did what only He could do—bring a dead man back to life—He invited those who stood around watching to help with the process.

“Loose him, and let him go.” It’s the same command Christ gives the church today.

Read an excerpt from @JoannaWeaverBks’s #LazarusAwakening on @TriciaGoyer’s blog:

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Don’t you love that? Jesus invited others to help Him with the process of healing! In my next blog I’m going to share hints for helping others who need healing, but first I want to speak to YOU. Do you have areas in your life where you need healing? Are you tired to the odor of death and stench that seem to cling to you? Do you wonder why the pain and the shame from the past still can cling to you, even though you’re a new creation in Christ? If so, keep reading. And be willing to ask others for help.

Joanna’s words are powerful to me because she was one of the friends who helped me remove my graveclothes. But in order for her to do that I had to be transparent and show her my mess. I had to confess Steven’s* email and the emotions that I thought were long gone. I knew that I couldn’t be strong in my own strength. I needed help. Here are three ways I invited Joanna—and other friends—in:

3 Ways To Invite Others Into Your Healing

I asked for prayer. Are you struggling? Ask your friend(s) to pray. Find people who you can trust. Let them know your struggles, and count on their prayers to hold you up.
I asked for Scripture passages. After I asked for prayers, I also asked my friends for their favorite Scripture passages. I spend time reading them, meditating on them and praying them myself. My friends pointed me to verses I’d forgotten. And, as I read, God’s word healed me.
I listened to their advice. This was the hardest part, but I listened to the advice of my friends. They shared how they overcame their own struggles in their own lives. They spoke with love, but they didn’t sugarcoat the situation. Sometimes it was hard to be transparent with my struggles and to listen, but my godly friends steered me in the right direction. I’m so thankful for that.

What are you struggling with? Open up and let your friends know. Be transparent and invite others into your healing. That’s the way God has designed things. We need each other in so many ways.

Today, spend time praying about the parts of your life that you need to be healed from. And if you would like to help others find the same type of healing then read Thursday’s post: 10 Ways to Help Others Find Healing in Christ. Until then, check out Joanna’s new book and DVD series!

Find healing today. @TriciaGoyer shares 3 ways to invite others into your healing here:

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To view the promo video and learn more about Joanna’s new DVD Bible study, go to www.joannaweaverbooks.com. You can connect with Joanna at www.Facebook.com/BecomingHis

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May 29, 2015 by Tricia Goyer 1 Comment

The Brave Writer

I’ve never considered myself a brave person. I’m not one to bungee jump, and the best I’ve done on the ski slopes is the beginner’s run. (And with much trepidation at that!)

Stepping out and deciding to pursuing writing was one of my bravest steps. Writing about the deep pain and struggles in my life—in my fiction and non-fiction—has been the bravest.

Yet I’ve done other things that are brave. Here are a few:

Adopting kids. John and I have adopted three kids in the last five years, and we’re in the process of adopting four more.
Moving to Arkansas. We moved for a ministry position and found a new place to call home.
Inviting my grandma to live with us. She’s lived primarily with our family since 1999. She’s a joy to have in our home.

But as a writer there are other brave things I do, too. These are small, daily choices:

Putting aside my writing to take the kids on a nature walk, even though I have a pressing deadline.
Babysitting my two young grandkids and playing with them in the backyard, even though I have a pressing deadline.
Taking our kids to Disney on Ice, even though I have a pressing deadline.
Spending a day at Magic Springs theme park, even though I have a pressing deadline.

As I write this, I’m five days away from that pressing deadline. (Prayers are appreciated!)

As I write this, I’m also considering what it means to be brave.

To find out what it means to be brave, hop on over to Inspired By Life and Fiction to read the rest of this post!

What does it mean to be brave? Find out from @TriciaGoyer here:

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May 12, 2015 by Tricia Goyer 5 Comments

Do You Dare? | Trusting God with Your Past, Present, & Future

“I have screwed up big time. If you can do anything with my life, please do.”

That was the eloquent prayer I prayed in the early months of 1989. I was 17 and pregnant. I had dropped out of regular high school. My boyfriend was out of the picture. My friends were going on with their senior year. I was depressed. I was without hope. I slept in until noon and watched soap operas, and I was pretty sure my life was over …

but then I dared to hope.

I dared to believe my Sunday School teacher who’d told me, years before, that Jesus loved me. I dared to trust that God could and would forgive me for my mistakes. I took a step of faith, praying to God to rescue me. I trusted that if I turned my life over to Jesus that he could give me a good future–even though I couldn’t see it or imagine it.

Do you dare to trust God to forgive and redeem your mistakes? @TriciaGoyer

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As I prayed those words, “If you can do anything with my life, please do,” I did not just pray them and then continue living and thinking in the destructive ways that got me where I was. Instead, I knew I needed to do my part.

I started reading my Bible. I started praying. I stopped watching television that promoted ungodly living, lust, destruction, and darkness. I stopped listening to music that turned my mind away from God. I instead listened to music that praised God and promoted right living. I surrounded myself with Christian friends. I attended church and modeled my life after those who were serving God. I prayed for my future, myself and my son. I worked to control my tongue. I sought forgiveness when I messed up. I got on my knees, and I confessed when I messed up. I shared with others what God was doing in my life. I spent time reading the Bible.

I did not change overnight. I still cussed and cursed at times. I was drawn to bad situations. I dishonored God at times. I made bad choices. I clung to pleasures of my flesh. In fact, these are all still things that I battle with.

But the more I sought God, turned to Him, read God’s Word, walked away from ungodliness, surrounded myself with people who loved God, the more I changed. It’s choosing the right way–God’s way–and turning my back on all that led me down the destructive path that made all the difference in my life.

God does not expect us to be perfect, but He does expect us to seek him for guidance, strength, wisdom, and the strength to make right choices. We do this through reading God’s Word, prayer, and following examples of those who put him first.

God doesn’t expect us to be perfect, but to seek Him in ALL things! @TriciaGoyer

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He has done amazing things with my life–more than I can imagine. And I know that he can do the same with yours.

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May 6, 2015 by Tricia Goyer 1 Comment

Relinquish … Give Your Dreams to God

I was thinking about it yesterday, and I’ve had constant book contracts since 2002. That means constant book deadlines since 2002! This, friends, is the grace of God. It’s nothing I could have done without Him … I don’t even want to try!

When I attended my first writer’s conference, I was 22 years old and pregnant with my third child. I had big dreams of being a “Christian author.” According to the world’s standards, there is no explanation for the fact that I have 50 books published and another 8 somewhere in the publishing process (from contract stage to soon-to-be released.) There is no explanation that some of one series is under contract in Hollywood either. I have no college degree. I work at home while I also homeschool. I have no parents or in-laws who live locally to fall back to for support. I have no full-time maid or nanny!

God had a plan for you before you were born! @TriciaGoyer

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What I do have is trust that God had a plan for me before I was born (Psalm 139). When I was considering if I should pursue writing, I thought back to my childhood. I grew up in a family who didn’t read many books, yet I found myself at the library constantly. That had to be God. Then, as a young mom, my close friend Cindy McCormick Coloma was also pursing writing, and God put her in my path to inspire and encourage me. He showed up again.

At the very first local writer’s group that Cindy and I attended, we heard about the Mt. Hermon Writer’s Conference, and it was there that God connected me with numerous friends and mentors, including Robin Gunn. A few years later He brought Janet Grant into my life. She was just starting her agency, and she took a chance on me. What a miracle!

But with all the ups and downs, a pivotal point in my writing journey happened during one of my publishing darkest moments. I’d been promised a book contract and then that fell through. I was heartbroken! Within days I went to a writing workshop by Ellen Gunderson Traylor. She spoke of a time when she had to relinquish her writing to God. She realized she’d been pursing writing more than she’d been pursing God. That night I went into my room and I did the same thing. I got on my knees and I told God.

“I give this writing thing to you. If nothing EVER happens with it I’m okay than that. I want you more than writing. You can take it away.”

And I meant it.

For a season it looked like that was happening. I cared for my grandpa during his last months of life, and I helped to start Hope Pregnancy Center. And through those experiences, I learned many things that changed me and transformed me. God rubbed my heart with sandpaper–showing me the pain and need of the world–and then He brought me back to writing. He showed me He did have a plan for my words, but He needed me to experience the world a bit more. He also had work to do in my own heart.

Having a desire for someTHING shouldn’t loom bigger than God does @TriciaGoyer

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Maybe your passion isn’t writing … or maybe it is … either way know that having a desire for someTHING should never loom bigger than God does. God planted talents and passions in your heart before your birth, but those things should never become more important than Him.

If you feel as if you’re hitting a wall, I encourage you to RELINQUISH those dreams. Tell God with a sincere heart that you want Him more than any thing. Turn your dream over to Him and let Him work.

Sometimes it may seem as if He’s taking you completely off track, but God doesn’t see it that way. God knows what will prepare your heart for His good work. He knows what will bring you to the end of yourself so He can work. God doesn’t want to see what you can do. Instead, He wants to show you–and others–what He can do through you.

No man or women can dream bigger than God can. I’m proof of that. And in the end, when our passions and talents are filtered through His purposes God gets the glory, not us. And we can step back, thankful to be part of His good work.

What expectations or dreams do you need to relinquish to God and trust His perfect plan for you?

P.S. Don’t forget to check out my Facebook page for a special WWII book giveaway!

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April 23, 2015 by Tricia Goyer Leave a Comment

Take Time to Create. Take Time to Explore.

When I first began pursuing my dream career as a writer, I felt guilty following my dreams. My days looked like this: homeschooling in the morning, and then writing in the afternoon with a few hours I set aside while my children played. Those early years, I wrote articles and ideas for novels as Barney played on the television. At least a dozen times during those writing hours, my kids would ask me for milk, for a snack, or to play with them. I’d offer what I could but then reminded them, “This is Mommy’s writing time.”

Guilt weighed me down as if Barney the dinosaur sat on my shoulders. I thought I must have been the worst homeschooling mother ever. To combat my guilt, I swung the other way. I wanted to do everything—to make sure my kids lacked nothing. I became over-committed, making frequent library trips, getting my kids involved in every church program, and signing my daughter up for dance lessons and my boys up for sports.

It was my husband who urged me to stop the madness. Sure, I was writing and my kids had very active lives, but I was running myself into the ground. Our kids even started getting stressed because they had no down time. Finding peace took me figuring out what was most important and focusing on that.

Find out what’s important to you & focus on it! @TriciaGoyer

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“Commitment leads to action. Action brings your dream closer,” says Marcia Wieder. During the months to come, John and I dreamt about what type of family we wanted. This was just as important as any writing dream. Then, once we knew our priorities we were able to decide our action, our priorities:

To provide a godly education for our kids
To sign up each child for one extra-curricular activity a year
To have dinner time as a family
To train our children how to be part of the family unit and do chores
To connect and serve in our local church
To have reading time together as a family at night
To see what God was doing in our lives and follow Him

Now that I’m getting the chance to homeschool again, Alyssa, I’m finding I’m more lax about things. I’m also a lot easier on myself about following my dreams and being a good mom. These priorities continue to guide my everyday living as I spend time with my writing and with my daughter . . . and Barney still playing in the background.

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April 15, 2015 by Tricia Goyer 5 Comments

Contentment | The Key to Having an Awesome Day

Contentment. We talk about it, but do we actually practice it? I have learned that contentment can change your whole perspective and be the key to have an awesome day.

Contentment: The Key to Having an Awesome Day

I thought I was going to lose my mind. We’d just got back from a trip, and suitcases and dirty clothes were strewn about. My publishing company needed a project from me ASAP. My grandma needed me to go to the grocery store for her, and I had a board meeting of all things. Oh, and did I mention my youngest girl whom I’ve nicknamed Tornado?

There were a few many times I wanted to scream. “Just give me five minutes, people, won’t you?!” But in the midst of my frenzied thoughts I remembered a few things.

We’d just had a nice weekend trip with our family.

I get to work with publishing people . . . writing real books.
My grandma is still alive. I can see her smile. I can hear her prayers for me. (Yes, sometimes I place my ear against her bedroom door in the morning when she prays.)
I am blessed to be part of a non-profit organization that is serving the poorest of the poor in our community.
Finally, after years of longing for a child, God blessed us with a little girl.

Instead of screaming, I prayed. Lord, help me. Give me strength and peace. I surrender my day to you.

Lord, help me. Give me strength and peace. I surrender my day to you. @TriciaGoyer

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Nothing changed, not really. But inside everything changed. Contentment began to grow in my heart instead of frustration.

So, do you want to make your day miserable? Letting troubled thoughts like these infiltrate your mind are surefire ways to beat yourself down . . . and slow today’s productivity . . . and make your life seem harder compared to everyone else’s. This is a sure way to kill contentment. Do you do any of these things below?

Open your eyes in the morning and think of all you didn’t accomplish or complete yesterday.
Jump to conclusions and feel unappreciated when your husband asks, “So do you have any plans today?” As if you didn’t have a huge to-do list every day.
Push aside your Bible reading and jump into sorting that pile of laundry that taunts you from overflowing baskets.
Remember what it used to feel like to wear your skinny, skinny jeans.
Compare your kids to the star athletes and brainiacs your neighbors have.
Compare your house, office, or yard to the awesome pictures posted on Pinterest.
Walk the mall and point out all the things you wish you had money to buy.

(Don’t you feel depressed just reading that list?)

I’m guilty of replaying these types of messages in my mind and making my day truly miserable. Let me tell you: This is not the way to live life! You should find contentment with what God has given you.

Instead, here are some ways to make your day awesome!

Thank God for whatever your day holds and ask for strength to get through your to-do list.
Give your husband a hug and see if he has something special that you can help him with.
Take time to read your Bible and ask the Creator of the universe to guide your day.
Appreciate your health, and pray and ask God to help you in all areas you are weak.
Hug your kids and tell them what you appreciate most about who God made them to be.
Relax in your favorite part of your house for ten minutes and thank God for what He’s provided. Or pull a chair outside and thank God for the beauty of nature.
Go through your closet and pull out clothes you haven’t worn in a while and take them to Goodwill. You’ll feel better knowing you’re blessing someone else through your donations.

I don’t know about you, but my day can go from feeling overwhelmed and cheap to feeling like I’m the luckiest girl in the world. It’s amazing how a simple change of thoughts can make all the difference.

A simple change of thoughts can make all the difference! @TriciaGoyer

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You might also like: Finding Contentment in Christ not in perfect home.

April 14, 2015 by Tricia Goyer 1 Comment

The B-Word | All About Balance

When it comes to writing at home, serving in our church and community, and loving our family, we all strive for the same thing: balance. We believe it’s out there, and if we discover the right formula we’ll find it. And, when we find it, there we will have peace.

As a wife, mom of six (soon to be 10!), leader in a community support group, and full-time writer, radio host, and blogger I have the answer to the issue of “balance.” The answer is that balance is not possible . . . or at least not in the form of a perfect schedule or routine. For even if we find balance one day, it most likely will slip between your fingers the next. People have unique needs on a daily basis. Work schedules are dependent on others. Health wavers, moods change. Husbands have crises at work. The people we serve in the community have struggles often. Very often.

The only thing we can be certain of is that as soon as we achieve a small measure of balance something is going to overturn the applecart and all our good intentions will spill out like crabapples, becoming scattered and bruised.

The thing about balance is that the only one who can control tomorrow (or even the rest of today) is the One who can also provide for our moment-by-moment needs when our schedule gets out of whack. God not only knows what’s coming, but He also knows what we need to do today to prepare for it.

How do I balance my life?

I schedule a few key things:

Naps and bedtimes are a biggie for me. My little kids take a nap every day, at around the same time. And we strive to have them in bed by 7:30 p.m. We also try to have dinner as a family every night. Schedules give our children a sense of order. And when I know they’ll be in bed at a good hour, I can look forward to some element of peace in the evenings.

I pick two to three important things to get done in each day.

There are days I need to write 2,000 words. There are days I need to get caught up on laundry. These two things cannot happen on the same day. When I choose what to focus on some things, I’m also choosing what to ignore. This is important. There will never be enough time to do it all. Ever.

I set aside times for fun and play.

I give attention to my little ones first thing in the morning (instead of jumping straight onto the computer). I also try to spend an hour with them of dedicated time in the afternoons between the time they wake up from naps and the time I have to start working on dinner. We play in the yard, blow bubbles, or take a walk. When my kids know they’ll have dedicated time, they don’t have to fight for time (or act up to try to get it) throughout the day.

I seek help.

I’ve managed my workload so I can have a young mom come in four hours a week to clean. I have an assistant who helps with my blogs and other online help. I have a friend/nanny who watches my little ones for blocks of time so I can write. I was not at this place ten years ago, but I’ve worked to find people who I can help financially and who can help me. While you may not be at the place to hire someone, ask yourself if there is there someone who you can trade with. For years I traded homeschool days with another mom so I’d have a free day. Also, when you see someone who is seemingly “doing it all,” know that that person probably has help, too. No one can do it all and balance everything well. No one.

I turn to God.

He has the answers for your day. His Spirit will guide you to what’s most important. God has good plans for you and your family. Instead of looking to find the perfect schedule—the perfect balance—look to God for His plan for your day. Take your eyes off of that printed up schedule, and put them on Him, and you will go far into having a healthy and happy family and a productive work life, too!

How does she do it? @TriciaGoyer shares 5 ways she balances her life here:

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Want to learn more? Check out Balanced!

How can a work-at-home mom raise kids, juggle a career and take care of family responsibilities with only 24-hour days? Working at home while raising kids and juggling a career and family responsibilities is no easy feat. Author and homeschooling mom Tricia Goyer shares her tips for finding balance among all your many hats as a mom. Balancing is a process and a journey, one that Tricia herself has yet to perfect. But between writing more than forty books, raising and homeschooling six kids, being a wife, and being active in her community, she has amassed valuable tips she shares in “Balanced.”

The book includes tips on:
—how to create focus themes for your family
—how to prioritize your schedule
—how to utilize your job so it also benefits your kids
—how to keep yourself out of the comparison game
—how to make working at home work for you
—and much more!

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April 10, 2015 by Tricia Goyer Leave a Comment

11 Ways to Spark Creativity

As a writer, I know all about creativity. I know how essential it is. I know how fun it can be. I also know what it’s like to be at a loss for creativity. Even as a mom, creativity is important. Combine the needed creativity for being both a mom and a writer . . . well, it’s tough to come by.

When there are people and paperwork and piles to manage . . .
When I look around my house and see the walls that need to be painted and the cupboards that should be organized . . .
When my inbox is cluttered with notes I need to answer about work stuff and volunteer stuff . . .
When output is more than input . . .

. . . my creativity well often runs dry.

What can you do when you need an extra “spark” of inspiration? Here are a few things I do.

Get your creative juices following with these 11 ideas from @TriciaGoyer

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Call a funny friend.
Sit outside. Breathe in fresh air. Listen to birds sing. Watch busy ants.
Open a book of poetry, or rent an audio book of poetry from the library. Absorb the symbolism and fresh word combinations.
Open a cookbook to a random page, then go shopping for the needed ingredients. (And then cook it!)
Go to YouTube.com and watch old dance numbers like this one.
Visit Etsy and take their taste test. This is one of my favorites. I love the fresh colors, textures, and ideas.
Play with Visuwords. Follow word trails and see where they lead you.
Have a visual feast and iStock Photo. (It’s also a great place for gathering inspiration for novel settings and characters or blog ideas.)
Pray and thank God for His creativity. Thank Him for your favorite places, people, tastes, and the beauty of nature.
Read your favorite Bible verses in a translation or paragraph you normally don’t read. Here is my favorite Bible verse in The Message (Zephaniah 3:17): “Don’t be afraid. Dear Zion, don’t despair. Your God is present among you, a strong Warrior there to save you. Happy to have you back, he’ll calm you with his love and delight you with his songs.”
Write a greeting card verse and e-mail it to a special person. Or better yet, browse creative sites (like MarthaStewart.com) for card ideas and make your own.

Sometimes what we need is simply a break in our day from the mundane tasks of life. These tips are perfect for breaking up a routine. Who knows? You might end up inspired to finish writing that blog or to tackle that inbox.

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March 25, 2015 by Tricia Goyer 1 Comment

Homeschooling Mom, Do You Need Outside Help?

As a wife, a mom, a sinner-saved-by-grace, and a servant of God, I have peace knowing God has a plan for my life. That He’s always had a plan. And that He’s here to guide me to His path for me. This is one of my favorite verses:

All the stages of my life were spread out before you, the days of my life all prepared before I’d even lived one day. Psalm 139:16

I look to this verse because I need the reminder that God isn’t finished with me yet. I’m thankful I’m a work-in-progress. I’m happy to put (and keep) my life in my hands. Yet, when I think of my kids’ lives, I want to be more of an active participant. I forget God has all my children’s days planned, too. For some reason I try to wrangle the responsibility out of His hands and put it into mine. I try to figure out the “best path” for my kids and then pray and ask God to help me achieve it.

When my husband and I started the process of adopting two children from the foster care system. I knew that we’d have challenges, but my mind never swayed from my educational choice to homeschool them. After all, I’ve been a homeschooling mom for twenty years!

Yet right away I discovered my children’s numerous issues, due to abuse and neglect. Issues more complex than I could handle. I knew how to be a mom (even a homeschooling mom), but they needed help with behavior, speech, and occupational and speech therapy. Within a few weeks I realized I needed help outside our home . . . lots of it!

With the help of our social worker, my husband and I looked around and found the best resources for our new kids. Both of my children have amazing therapists who work with me on bonding and caring for these children with past issues. Our youngest in an awesome preschool that provides all the therapies he needs in one place. We’ve seen him blossom. And from word-of-mouth we heard about an amazing private, Christian therapy school that is exactly what our five-year-old needs.

I have to admit there are moments when I feel like a traitor for still calling myself a “homeschooling” mom, especially when two out of three of my kids who are still “homeschooling age” are away from the home for a large part of the day. But God has reminded me that this is part of His plan . . . even when it wasn’t part of mine. He knew before they were born what they would need in order to heal. He knew the people who would help them and guide them. He brought co-laborers to help me with the process.

My goal is for these children to find healing and for us to come to the place where we can be a happy, healthy, and thriving homeschooling family. But for now, God is showing me that sometimes being the best “homeschooling” mom means finding the right help for my children in this season of our lives.

Homeschooling should never be a label we wear to the sacrifice of our children’s needs.

Homeschooling should never be a label we wear to the sacrifice of our children’s needs @TriciaGoyer

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It’s about finding God’s plan for our children’s lives and helping them thrive within it. I needed the reminder that God isn’t finished with my children yet. I’m thankful they are works-in-progress. And I’m learning to happily put (and keep) their lives in His hands.

For more information, visit my how-to pages:

Read the original post at freehomeschooldeals.com.

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March 21, 2015 by Tricia Goyer 1 Comment

4 Thoughts that Will Transform Your Schedule

I wrote the book Balanced, yet I love how God is able to use my own words to help and inspire myself! As I’ve written blogs based on the book, it’s given me a chance to rethink some of the concepts. Every season of life is different, and I’m even in a new season since the nine months when I wrote the book! These are things I was reminded of—important thoughts that transformed my schedule.

How to transform your #schedule: tips from @TriciaGoyer #BalancedChallenge

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1. Take time to ponder where you’re falling short.

On my current Fail! and Yeah! List I identified that while I was giving a lot of attention to my little kids, it was easy to ignore the older ones. It worked out that I was able to go on a road trip to Nashville, and my nineteen-year-old went with me. We chatted on the drive. We went to a concert, and we enjoyed being together! If I hadn’t stopped to ponder where I was falling short, I would have missed out on the memories I was able to make with Nathan. When I think about where I’m falling short, I can make plans to succeed.

2. Take time to build teamwork in your family.

I’d had been slacking on working with my children concerning chores. I knew it would be a lot of work. IT IS! Yet they are so excited to help and to be part of a team. If I hadn’t done this challenge I probably would have let my little kids slide for while longer (months? a year?). Yet when I was reminded of the importance of building a family team, I made creating a chore time schedule a priority. When I think in terms of “teamwork” it changes how I/we work around the home.

3. Take time to prioritize.

When my to-do list gets too full, it gets easy to want to give up. When I pick the “most important thing” and do that, it’s amazing what can get done. When I think about “what’s most important,” I understand my next steps.

4. Take time to praise.

I love God but so many times I forget to thank Him for ALL things. My husband is traveling this week, which means life is harder for this momma. Yet when I praise God for the kids, the mess, and even the weariness, I’m reminded that God sustains me. When I think about God, it makes it easier to ask Him for help throughout the day.

What about you? How do your thoughts transform your schedule?

Steps You can Take

Think about your thoughts. How do they change your attitude and actions? Take three minutes to journal about that. (Time yourself!)
Write down three steps you can take to get your thoughts moving in the right direction.
Thank God for the way He created our minds to work. Ask Him to guide your thoughts today, knowing they will transform your actions!

Daily Prayer

Dear Lord Jesus,

I know my thoughts are like the wind that moves the sail of my actions. When my thoughts blow in a positive direction, I steer in the right direction. Lord, help me control my thoughts today in a way that will positively impact my life and my family!

In Jesus’ name, amen.

Resources You Might Like:

GrATTITUDE: Practicing Contagious Optimism for Positive Change
Jesus Calling
My Utmost for His Highest

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