balanced

March 20, 2015 by Tricia Goyer 1 Comment

How to Find Time to Clean in the Random Moments of Your Day

I don’t have hours a day to clean . . . although since I have a college-aged son, a husband, a grandma, and three kids six-years-old and under at home, I wish I did!

Take advantage of the random moments in your day! Here’s how (@TriciaGoyer #balanced):

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Instead, I’ve developed the habit of using random minutes throughout the day to clean. Here’s what I’ve done in the last week:

Unloaded the dishwasher while waiting for my daughter’s bagel to toast.
Picked up three toys as I’m walking across the living room to call the kids down for dinner.
Sorted the rubber bands and bobby pins as I’m brushing my teeth.
Picked up all the empty water bottles and papers in my car as I’m grabbing my purse to go inside.
Sorted through mail as I’m browning the hamburger for tonight’s spaghetti.
Took dirty clothes from my bathroom to the laundry room on the way to make my morning coffee.
Folded laundry when I’m on a business call.
Swept the floor as I helped my daughter with her homework.

It’s amazing how these little things add up! And when I see a straightened pantry (done while I was waiting for pasta to boil) it makes me want to tackle the crumbs on the counters. It’s amazing how the little things add up!

How about you? How do you use those random minutes throughout the day to clean?

Looking for more ways to find balance in your life? Get a copy of my book, Balanced, today for FREE!

Today’s Prayer

Dear Lord, thank you for the random moments throughout my day. Help me to make the most of them and to recognize them for what they are: little blessings.

Resources You Might Like:

Easy Green Living
Home Cleaning Made Easy
The Naturally Clean Home

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Disclosure of Material Connection: Some of the links in the post above are “affiliate links.” This means if you click on the link and purchase the item, I will receive an affiliate commission. Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will add value to my readers. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”

March 19, 2015 by Tricia Goyer 1 Comment

5 Ways to Breathe God-Messages

Where do you go for inspiration? Sometimes I sit down with my journal. Other times I take a walk or take a bath. Today I found inspiration from Facebook and hymns. Honestly!

Facebook is always interesting, but when I read through my feed today I noticed a few things:

Death, loss, and moms struggling with anxiety. I saw needs . . . lots of needs. I saw friends and acquaintances who need a fresh dose of encouragement and hope!

Do you know what #inspiration really means? @TriciaGoyer #BalancedChallenge

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Inspiration means “breath of God.” Sometimes when inspiration hits I’m able to do fun work. I’m able to write a moving chapter in my novel or pen a short story for a magazine. But sometimes God’s breath takes me to harder places where I feel others’ hurt deep in my chest.

Inspiration isn’t always light and fluffy. (Don’t we wish it was!) And sometimes creativity comes so that we can offer just the right words, messages, or images to a hurting friends.

Here are 5 ways to breathe God-messages:

Start with God’s Word. God’s Word is truth and is where all creativity comes from. Read meaningful passages and delve into the creativity of God’s Word. I love the poetry of Psalms. The word images always inspire me!
Pray for God’s inspiration. “The Sovereign LORD has given me a well-instructed tongue, to know the word that sustains the weary. He wakens me morning by morning, wakens my ear to listen like one being instructed,” Isaiah 50:4 (NIV). Pray that God will give you a well-instructed tongue to inspire and bless someone else.
Fill yourself up first. Before I even opened Facebook I spent time with God. I read numerous chapters from the book of John. I marveled at the compassion Jesus had for those who dared to trust Him. My heart grew thankful over His compassion for me, and soon my full heart was ready to spill out.
Pray for words, messages, or images that can be a gift to others. “A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in a setting of silver,” we read in Proverbs 25:11. Those “words” can be shared in numerous ways!
Find creative ways to share God’s truth. This morning my heart was drawn to creating a visual message for so hurting friends. This is what I came up with:

I don’t know who is going to see this graphic. I don’t know how these words will speak to hurting hearts. All I know is that God inspired me this morning, and creativity flowed. From the stirring that I feel deep within, I imagine it’ll keep flowing. That’s how creativity works, isn’t it? Once you prime the pump, it’s amazing what comes out!

In Balanced, I challenge readers to take time to find encouragement. So what about you? How do you get inspired? How many God-messages has He given you lately to share?

Five ways to find #inspiration and breathe God-messages (@TriciaGoyer):

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Steps You can Take

Spend time with God, praying for God’s inspiration.
Do something to feed your creative soul.
Let the creativity spill out through words, through music, through art.
Share your message (God’s message through you) with others.

Daily Prayer

Dear Lord,

Thank you for the creativity and inspiration you give us. I pray that you would continue to inspire me daily so that I can breathe your messages to those around me in need.

In Jesus name, amen.

Resources You Might Like:

The Creative Life
Scribbling in the Sand
A Million Little Ways

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March 13, 2015 by Tricia Goyer 2 Comments

How to Get Better at Handling Anger

I’ve been a mom for 23 years, and for the first five of those years I had moments when I struggled to control my anger. While I was growing up, my stepdad would go from straight-faced to slap-you-on-the-side-of-the-head-angry in 15 seconds flat. I found myself repeating that cycle. Most of the time I’d deal with my children’s disobedience in a peaceful manner, and then something small would push me over the edge. I wouldn’t hit, but flicks to the shoulder, smacks on the hand, or a firm squeeze on my child’s arm would let my children know I was serious.

Then there is that one day when everything changed. I was sitting next to my son as he colored on a paper. I went to swipe his bangs out of his eyes, and he flinched. My heart was broken. I offered a loving gesture, but that wasn’t what my son expected. After that, those angry actions stopped. I turned to God. I prayed about my anger, and I changed my habits. If I felt frustration building, I’d count to ten and then offer up a quick prayer. I’m thankful my older kids can’t remember that frustrated mom.

Eighteen years later, I again have three little kids in my home (through adoption), and I find myself struggling with the same thing again. When I feel the frustration building, I know to hold back my actions. I count to ten, and I pray. Yet this time that isn’t enough.

This time I have two children who’ve faced heartbreaking situations that put them into foster care. Because of the way they’ve previously been treated, it’s not enough to hold back my flicks and squeezes. Even a frustrated or angry look on my face—or the lowering of my voice—causes them to melt down. I don’t speak with angry words but an upset look means the same to them. I don’t act out in anger, but after reading the adoption books and praying, I have to go one step farther.

With my three younger children my goal was not to act out my anger. Now my goal is not to let it show on my face either. When I breathe deep—holding in my frustration—I exhale a smile. When I feel the tension building, instead of lowering my voice, I raise my voice an octave. And I pray, pray, pray.

I’ve realized that when it comes to anger, we can always do better. And even when we believe we have self control, we can control ourselves better, too.

When it comes to anger, we can always do better! @TriciaGoyer

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Anger will happen. Frustration will come. But how we handle ourselves is up to us. What is the best for your child? A mother who controls herself. What is even better for your child? A mother who turns to God to ask Him to help her control herself more.

Download and work through this printable to help you manage your anger!

Read the original post over at momlifetoday.com

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March 10, 2015 by Tricia Goyer Leave a Comment

10 Reasons a Homeschool Mom Needs a Night Out

Homeschooling: It’s part parenting, parting schooling, and pure craziness at times. Homeschooling is all-consuming. Homeschool moms are the moms and the teacher. Their job is 24/7. And as for rest . . . what’s that?

I had a chance to write the novelization of the movie Moms’ Night Out. Working on this project made me realize that more than anyone, homeschooling moms need a night out.

Here are the top 10 reasons why homeschool moms need a break!

10. To have a parent/teacher conference . . . in peace.

9. To dress like an adult again (i.e. no yoga pants or jeans allowed!).

8. To reconnect with friends and talk about things other than curriculum choices/challenges.

7. To connect with other moms (from all walks of life) and realize you’re not the only one on this challenging parenting journey.

6. Uninterrupted conversation (unless you count the wait staff as an interruption . . . which we don’t!).

Discover the other reasons and read the rest of this post at HEDUA.com.

Homeschooling moms… you need a break! @TriciaGoyer gives you 10 great reasons why:

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More About Moms’ Night Out

Moms’ Night Out is a novelization of the hilarious family comedy that celebrates real family life—where everything can go wrong and still turn out all right.

All Allyson and her friends want is a peaceful, grown-up evening of dinner and conversation . . . a long-needed moms’ night out. But in order to enjoy high heels, adult conversation and food not served in a bag, they need their husbands to watch the kids for a few hours—what could go wrong?

Chronicling one night out gone awry, three harried moms, their husbands, a sister-in-law with a misplaced baby, a tattoo parlor owner, a motorcycle gang, and a bewildered cabbie all learn to embrace the beautiful mess called parenting. This book spotlights the unfulfilled expectations and serial self-doubts many moms feel . . . then reassures us that the key is raising kids in a loving home. Mom’s Night Out is an endearing, true-to-life comedy.

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March 6, 2015 by Tricia Goyer 1 Comment

Have a Positive Outlook on Life . . . in 3 Minutes!

Are you a glass half-empty or glass half-full type of person? Do you always look to the negative or try to find the positive?

For many years I swayed toward Miss Negativity. I could have an almost-clean house, and I’d mope over the one area not yet sparkling. Or I’d read a dozen great reviews of my books and then cry over the one negative comment. For years I battled this, and it was only recently I realized how far I’ve come.

Through the years I’ve developed a habit that has guided me to to having a more positive outlook, and it has brought joy and thankfulness to my soul. My work and home life is better for it too! And the habit only takes three minutes!

See God . . . as ruler over all

As a homeschooling mom, support group coordinator, and author, I get overwhelmed often. Whether it’s a kid’s bad attitude, worries about one of the teen moms I mentor, or an impeding deadline, I tend to carry the world’s weights as heavy chains around my neck and heart. (Or at least I used to!)

One day, unable to function in the midst of all my numerous concerns, I rushed to my room, climbed under my duvet, and cried. Then, realizing the crying wasn’t to get me very far, I focused on God instead. I pictured God on His throne and Jesus by His side. I pictured those bowed before Him declaring, “Holy, holy, holy.” I pictured the earth spinning under His direction and His gaze of love looking down at me in my miserable state. And I imagined a look of love and compassion in His gaze.

When I climbed out from my bed, my heart was changed. My burdens were lifted, and I had a more positive outlook on life. And when I looked at the clock, I realized it had only been three minutes.

Three minutes reminded me of God’s place and His power. It took my thoughts off myself and my worries, and it put those thoughts on Him.

I’m sure my limited imagination barely grasped the awesomeness of being in His presence, but that exercise helped me. Seeing God—imagining Him—put my mind at ease. He is a great and loving ruler. My tasks and worries are tiny in comparison to Him! The next time I took my three-minute escape I pictured myself lifting my small concerns and handing them over.

First Chronicles 29:11 says,

“Yours, O LORD, is the greatness, the power, the glory, the victory, and the majesty. Everything in the heavens and on earth is yours, O LORD, and this is your kingdom. We adore you as the one who is over all things.”

Once we attempt to wrap our minds around the Lord’s greatness, power, glory, victory, and majesty, it’s easy to adore Him, and if we’re busy adoring Him, then it takes our mind off our concerns.

It also helps me to realize that God’s in control. He can guide me, help me, and give me peace. And He does all that as I fix my mind on Him!

Read the rest of this post over at forthefamily.org.

3 minutes is all you need to change your outlook. Find out how on @TriciaGoyer’s blog

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Need a more positive outlook? Spend three minutes reading over these Scriptures and picturing God on His throve. Then picture yourself, with palms facing up, offering all your cares, worries, and burdens up to Him.

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March 5, 2015 by Tricia Goyer 4 Comments

5 Questions that Can Change Your Schedule … and Your Life

5 Questions that Can Change Your Schedule …

and Your Life

I used to be the worst at saying no. If someone needed help at church, or a babysitter, or a work-project to get done, I was the person whom they could count on. I prided myself for being able to accomplish more than anyone I knew, but the cost was great. I was stressed. I was overwhelmed. I was tired all the time. And my shoulders grew weary from the high level of expectations. Especially mine. My husband, John, was the one who taught me to say no. After one ultra-busy season he sat me down and forced me to go over my schedule. Together we asked these questions in order to pare down our calendar:

Take a few minutes and answer these questions. You might want to start with the last one first. What do you miss out on when you forget to say no? One of the most important things is inner renewal.

Dear God,

I am stretched so thin. I barely have time for any of the things I’ve committed to. I need your help. Give me discernment in what to keep in my schedule and what to get rid of. May I have the strength to say ‘no’ to people when I know I cannot take on another task. May I focus on the activities that are most important and do well at them. Thank you for your guidance and support! May my life and choices glorify your name.

Ask yourself these 5 questions to change your schedule…& life! @TriciaGoyer

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Read the original post over at thebettermom.com.

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March 3, 2015 by Tricia Goyer 18 Comments

Restoring the Lost Art of Piggy Bank Savings

There is nothing more wonderful than to hear exciting announcements like this:

“Mom, I’m getting married!”

“Goyers, guess what? You’ve been chosen to adopt a wonderful sibling group!”

We’ve heard both within the last six months, which means that our family is growing in wonderful ways! (And more information about this new sibling group will be coming through my blog in future weeks … I promise!)

Of course, there’s nothing worse than hearing wonderful news and the first thought being, “Great, but how am I going to pay for this?!”

For most of our married life, John and I have spent whatever we’ve had in the bank, living check to check. Some years were very lean, and some years were abundant. But it’s been in the last few years that we’ve been better at savings … and aren’t we glad. Now we can look to expand our family with excitement, not huge worries about costs.

But that’s just one benefit.

Having a happy piggy bank also:

Helps guard against credit debt.
Helps to teach kids the value of money.
Reminds us that we are in control of our money.
Allows us to share our abundance and give to others.

Happy Piggy Banks Guard Against Credit Debt

Having a savings account is a buffer than helps you to guard against credit card debt. When you have money put aside, you can celebrate life’s events with a joyful heart, and without the worries of having to scale back on family celebrations. You are also prepared when those surprise expenses come up like medical bills or new tires.

Happy Piggy Banks Teach Kids the Value of Money

For children (well, sometimes adults too) the concept of money is vague. To help children understand better, show them an example of your family budget with savings, giving, and expenses laid out. Let your kids watch you as you write checks or put money into your savings account. Provide your children a small, weekly allowance and help them to do the same with their money.

Let the kids feed the pig! Piggy banks are a life-changing adventure. #savewithECCU bit.ly/ECCU4U

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Happy Piggy Banks Reminds Us We Are In Control of Our Money

When we spend using credit cards, money slips away every month with fees. When we have a budget and a savings account, we can happily decide between our wants, our needs, and how to spend and give. Instead of $50 or $100 (or more) going to interest every month, we can give to worthy organizations that supporting teenage moms or who fight against human trafficking around the world. We decide where every penny goes, and who it can help.

Happy Piggy Banks Allow Us to Share From Our Abundance And Give To Others

Having a savings account prepares us for life’s challenges, and life’s celebrations, but it also helps us to give with compassion. There have been times I’ve wanted to give to causes, but I’ve had little to give. When we save well, we can give well.

Saving Can Be Giving, Too

Most people already know the benefits of credit unions, such as customer ownership, fewer fees and higher savings rates. An added benefit is affinity-based banking—the intersection of faith and financial planning. These are financial institutions that offer business and consumer banking services while also investing profits in social causes. Using a credit union like this doubles your giving. You not only have more to give with few fees and higher savings rates, the credit union is using their profits to give to worthy causes, too!

If you’re looking to start making your piggy bank happy I’d like to help! (Actually ECCU wants to help and I’m excited about them helping YOU!)

Simple Math: Your savings + ECCU = More Ministry

With ECCU, your money does more than earn a good interest rate for you. It helps fuel Christ-centered ministry worldwide by providing loans to churches and low-cost banking services to missionaries and Christian organizations. Together, you + ECCU = supporting and resourcing more ministry. Plus, if you open a Money Market Savings today, ECCU will donate $50 to International Princess Project to help fight human trafficking in India.

“SAVE WITH ECCU” $1,000 GIVEAWAY!

Enter below for a chance to win $1,000. The contest runs from March 5 – April 10, 2015. The qualified winner must open an ECCU Money Market Savings account where the $1,000 will be deposited. Click here for official rules.

a Rafflecopter giveaway

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February 5, 2015 by Tricia Goyer 2 Comments

How to be “Involved” in Ways that Really Matter

Have you ever heard this saying by Theodore Roosevelt: “Nobody cares how much you know, until they know how much you care”? Caring takes involvement. Caring takes being present.

We are involved in a lot of things today, but how much time do we take to be involved with people . . . really involved?

How many minutes did you spend on Facebook or email yesterday, compared to having a face-to-face conversation? It’s easy to send out 140-character tweets. It’s harder to really listen and cry with a friend.

Caring for God—loving Him—takes involvement too. It’s easy to listen to Christian music about God, to talk about God, or even to write about God’s goodness without allowing Him to fill us and impact every part of our lives. God is waiting for us to come to Him and be still before Him, yet instead we dance around the outskirts of the relationship, trying to make Him notice us.

Is this you? Sometimes it’s me. If so, we need to remember that we’re not fooling anyone. People know (our kids especially) when we’re really tuned in. Jesus knows what’s needed in our hearts.

“Jesus had a way of helping people see the condition of their hearts,” says Henry Blackaby. “He said, ‘These people draw hear to Me with their mouths, and honor Me with their lips, but their heart is far from me’ (Matt. 15:8) . . . If you want to know if you are responding to God with your head or your heart, look to see what is coming out of your life.”

What is coming out of the relationships in your life: deep connections or surface friendships? What’s coming out of your relationship with God?

Are you ever disappointed with God’s involvement in your life? Does God seem far away during the week when you are trying to make decisions or when you are faced with some kind of difficulty? When we draw close to Him during every day moments, then we’ll have a strong relationship that we can lean on during the hard times.

Involvement means caring.
Involvement means being present.
Involvement means face-to-face conversations.
Involvement means being real.
Involvement means opening our heart to God and allowing Him to show us what’s inside.

Your kids, your husband, your friends, and God are all waiting for you to connect with them today. Take five minutes and list out three ways you can do just that.

I can be involved with my spouse by . . .
I can be involved with my kids by . . .
I can be involved with God by . . .

Not only will they be impact, your life and heart will forever be changed, too.

Get involved. Today.

Caring takes involvement. Caring takes being present. @TriciaGoyer

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January 8, 2015 by Tricia Goyer 29 Comments

7 Ways to Know God’s Call

There is a myth today that says we must get our life organized and in order before we follow God’s call. Our kids must have adequate time with us. Our debt must be paid down. Our days must have space … and peace.

After all, how can we do great things for God when we don’t even have time to spend ten minutes in prayer? How can we give from a empty well? How can we spare what we don’t have: whether it be time, money or energy. Yet God’s call never waits for us to unclutter our lives. In fact, He usually calls us when we have nothing to spare. Why?

When we don’t have anything to give, we look to the Giver.
When we have no time, we must readjust our priorities and set things according to God’s schedule.
When we feel foolish and inadequate, we’ll look to God’s wisdom.
When we feel wrung out, we’ll look to His strength.
And in the midst of following Him, we’ll find Him.

When John and I were busy with careers and older kids, God called us to adopt.
When I was a busy homeschooling mom and writer, He called me to help start a crisis pregnancy center.
When our family was settled in Montana, God called us to Arkansas—and to an inner city church.
When I had not a moment to spare with book deadlines and kids, He’s continued to call me to serve and inspire teenage moms through our Teen MOPS support group.

Even last week when I had family visiting and a book deadline, God called John and I to help a teen mom move her and her kids. She was blessed. We were blessed, too.

And what have I discovered?

More time? (Not really.)
More energy? (I wish!)

Instead, I’ve discovered that when I do God’s work He takes care of mine (the deadlines get met, the kids get cared for).

When I do God’s work, He take care of mine @TriciaGoyer

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Yes, the words for the books and blogs come when I’m too tired to think. And my children are trained on what following God looks like.

Something else happens, too. Lives are transformed. Children without a home find one. Young women who don’t know what being a mother means are mentored. Some of these young women in crisis even bow their heads and pray for salvation. (I’ve got to experience that recently!)

How do you know what God’s calling you to do?

(Notice I didn’t say IF He’s calling.) Here are 7 ways:

There’s a burden on your heart you can’t shake.
There is a specific person you know of who needs your help.
The Scripture passage that you read encourages you to have faith and step out.
When you pray you have a sense that God is asking you to act.
You don’t have time, but you have a seed of faith.
God brings someone into your life to encourage your calling (your spouse, your pastor, a godly friend.)
You feel as if you can’t do it alone.

Here are 7 ways to know what God is calling you to do! @TriciaGoyer

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There are many things that can occupy our time—there always will be. There are good things that we can devote our lives to, but the most important things are the God things.

When you do decide to step out your schedule won’t automatically clear, it never does. Instead, God will show up. He will give you extra wisdom, energy, resources and strength. But mostly He will give you Himself!

And when you have Him, you have everything.
And when you give others the knowledge of Him, they can have Him, too.
And when lives around you are transformed, all the stuff you were busy with doesn’t seem as important any more.

And God is glorified, because it’ll be clear to everyone that it’s Him doing the work!

How about you? What do you feel God calling you to? What are you doing about it?

Prayer

Father God, you have blessed me with so much. Thank you for the unique life you given me. Help me manage my time and resources wisely. Guide me as I look to what you are calling me to do and give me the strength and wisdom to fulfill my purpose.

More Resources:

Balanced by Tricia Goyer

Purpose Driven Life by Rick Warren

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January 7, 2015 by Tricia Goyer 3 Comments

Is It Time For A Clean Sweep?

Is It Time For a Clean Sweep?

I love the television show Clean Sweep. In the show the contents of a whole room are placed into a person’s driveway, and their things are sorted into piles: Keep, Maybe Keep, and Toss. One of the aspects I love about the show is the way junk is fretted over. Seriously, do you really want to keep those mismatched potholders, that torn and stained rug, or that Duran Duran cassette from 1987? If you have to ask, “What is this?” “Where does it go?” or “What does it do?” perhaps it should betossed.

The truth is, maybe we need to look at our lives and schedule the same way we look at the clutter around our house in little piles or big stacks.

Do you have things cluttering your mind, heart, or time that need to be cleaned out?

I remember one day when my husband encouraged me to do a clean sweep. A busy mom of two toddlers and one school-aged child, I was overwhelmed and exhausted by life. John could see it was taking a toll on me. When he asked me about my day, I muttered and moaned. I had a great husband, a budding career, and good kids . . . so why was I so frustrated? Because I was doing too many “important” things and I was exhausted.

John asked me to sit down with my schedule and list everything I was doing. It was a long list! I wrote down cleaning, caring for kids, cooking, schooling, dance class, sports activities, gardening, Bible study and writing—just to name a few. Then John asked me to use my common sense: “Is this something you love? Something you feel called to?”

As I went over my schedule I realized everything, everything, ranked as a priority. I had given it all equal weight. The things I didn’t like took up just as much time as the things I found joy in . . . and soon the joy had become lost in the clutter.

My wise husband urged me to think through a few questions:

What things was I doing because I couldn’t say no?
What things had worked for a season but no longer worked for our family?
What things could I hand off to someone else?

As I thought about my needs—and my kids’ needs—as I listened to my heart and my gut, I started making better decisions. Before I took on new responsibilities I considered whom I was most responsible for—my kids. My common sense grew, and I learned to think through why I wanted to do something and where it would fit. Once I started cutting things, I discovered I really cared about the things that were left!

What do you need to cut to make room for what matters? @Tricia Goyer

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What about you? Are you too busy doing too many things? Ask yourself these questions:

What things am I doing because I can’t say no?
What things worked for a season but no longer work for our family?
What things can I hand off to someone else?

Then start cutting away. It’ll be hard, but it’ll be worth it. Not only will your schedule feel freer, but your heart will too. Guaranteed!

Read this post and other great articles over at MomLifeToday.com!

Are you a work-at-home mom raising kids, juggling a career and taking care of family responsibilities with only 24-hour days? Working at home while raising kids and juggling a career and family responsibilities is no easy feat. That’s why I wrote Balanced: Finding Center as a Work-at-Home Mom. Balancing is a process and a journey, one that I have yet to perfect. But between writing more than forty books, raising and homeschooling six kids, being a wife, and being active in my community, I have amassed valuable tips that I shared in Balanced.

Download this FREE printable from Balanced to help you figure out what needs cutting in your calendar.

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