family

September 8, 2006 by Tricia Goyer 10 Comments

7 Questions for Tricia Goyer

Okay, a while ago I asked my blog readers to ask ME some of the questions I’ve been asking my writer friends. Here are my answers . . .

1. Letica: If you could be in any time period past, present or future which one would it be? And why?

Tricia: Well, first I thought World War II. I could get some great research . . . but I don’t know if I’m tough enough! Then I thought it would be great if I could go to the future far enough where travel is even faster and cheaper, then I could meet my friends, who live across the country, for lunch!

2. Cara: Tricia, you write fiction, books for youth, AND nonfiction. Out of the three, do you find any of them easier to write?

Tricia: Non-fiction is easier. I really, really love my fiction novels once I’m about 1/2 way through the book and know my characters and where the story is going, BUT the first 1/2 is murder. I question everything and research far too much.

With non-fiction I break it into sections, and can tackle a piece at a time. It’s harder to do that with fiction where everything flows.

3. Cara: Tricia, how has your family influenced your writing?

Tricia: If I didn’t have my family, I could hide away and write for hours . . . but I’m sure my writing would be flat and lifeless. My family reminds me of the color added to The Wizard of Oz. They bring joy, frustration, laughter, tears, and fun. They color my life and my writing.

4. Cara: Lake breezes or mountain vistas?

Tricia: My dream is to buy a house on the lake some day. My friend has a house like that, and I could sit there all day and soak it in. BUT I do have mountain vistas. As I’m sitting here looking out my office window, I have a perfect view of the Rocky Mountains which is about five miles away as the crow flies. I know many people fly from around the world for this view and I’m thankful.

5. Cara: As someone who does the same, tell me how YOU balance homeschooling and writing?

Tricia: Good question 🙂 I have a small office that has a desk wrapping around three walls. I have my corner and each of my kids have their own section with their computers. In the morning, they filter in and get started on their schoolwork. Now that they are older, a lot of their curriculum is computer-based. They work on their school work, and I work on my work.

I’m not sure if I was made this way, or God has helped me develop this ability, but I can stop and start my writing as needed. I can be in the middle of an emotional scene, stop and help with a multiplication project, then jump back into the writing.

I also think of homeschooling as a lifestyle, and I don’t simply focus on homework. We go on walks together, exercise together, do chores together, go to the library, watch educational movies, do devotions together, etc.

Actually, I’m not a scheduled homeschooler, but everything gets done during the day. Since they’ve been homeschooled their whole lives, the kids know what is expected of them such as work has to be done before play. I think this is important because for the rest of their lives in the real world they’ll have to be self-teaching and self-motivated to succeed in life. And I’d like to think I’ve imparted that to my kids.

6. Cara: If you could jump in the car with enough gas money to take you anywhere, where would you drive?

Tricia: I’d load up my family and go to Washington, D.C. We’d check out the country on the way there . . . and then fill up on museums and historical sites when we got there!

7. Cara: Honesty, wisdom, or humor, which do cherish most in a friend?

Tricia: Honesty. I have wise friends. I have funny friends. But the friends I cherish most are those I turn to who I know will encourage me when I want to be encouraged AND rebuke me when I need to be rebuked. They tell me what I NEED to hear, not just what I want to hear. And I know they do it because they love me.

August 31, 2006 by Tricia Goyer Leave a Comment

Homestudy

Well, I’m happy to report that homestudy went extremely well. It was painless, actually! And the more we talked with the social worker, the more excited I became. We will have another daughter, it’s just a matter of a little more paperwork and a lot of time waiting. (We’re looking at 1 1/2 years still!)

One cool thing is how this adoption process has helped us understand God even better. Every night, we have a time of Bible Study with our kids. We’re currently studying the first chapters of Ephesians. These chapters talk about God’s plan to adopt us as His own. About Him preparing a heavenly place for us. About our seat in the heavenly places.

Likewise, we have this child in our hearts . . . and she’s most likely not even born. We pray for her. We have a name for her. She is a part of our family. It’s a message that resonates in our hearts.

Thank you for your continued prayers. Next week I’ll be plunging in to the remaining paperwork, and then it’s time to start my next book project. At least I’m not twiddling my thumbs as I wait for our girl! Instead I’m diligently working at what God lays before me . . . trusting Him.

August 29, 2006 by Tricia Goyer 4 Comments

This Is My Life

Today, I don’t have time for a long post because in a few hours the social worker will be arriving to start the homestudy concerning about adoption.

For those of you who don’t know, my husband and I are in the process of adopting a baby girl from China. And this homestudy is another step closer in bringing her home.

Of course, I have to admit that this homestudy has unnerved me more than I thought it would. The 13-pages of questions was difficult enough, but the idea of a person coming into to study our home and life . . . well, it’s hard to put it into words.

So I’ve thrown myself into the only thing I could tangibly do–my house got a total cleaning. Every closet and drawer has been touched. My office, for the first time in months, actually looks like someplace where books could be written.

I know, you don’t have to tell me. Our approval for this adoption will not hinge on whether the clothes in my closet are organized by color and season (although they now are). In fact, as a friend told me last week, “If your life isn’t acceptable now, a week won’t make the difference.” She was right.

Still, what else could I do? John and I have put sixteen years into our life, our kids, our home. We’ve loved lots and we’ve attempted to follow Jesus. In the end that is all we can do. In the end that has to be enough. And my hope is that by focusing on our heavenly home, our earthly one will be up to par.

And either way, even the hamsters now have clean cages. And, I think I have a few more minutes to tackle the goldfish bowl . . .

April 26, 2006 by Tricia Goyer 5 Comments

Random Thoughts about Family and Writing

Keeping “Family First” is tough when it comes to writing. The hardest part is not getting frustrated trying to do it all! Sometimes I get impatient with my family when I have a deadline. Other times, I’m sluggish because I have to work when I want to be having fun with my family. It’s a tough balancing act.

Of course, my dedication to writing isn’t all bad. When I first wrote, I did it while my kids were napping or after they went to bed. It was “my time” away from the cooking, cleaning, and diapers.

Once the kids got older they had to learn that “mom had work too.” I wasn’t always there to entertain them. This actually turned out to be a good thing. As the kids got older, they knew how to entertain themselves. And since all three of them were home together every day, they were always busy creating forts or producing skits. They became best pals!

Having kids who know how to keep themselves occupied is huge. I have a lot of friends whose kids need to be entertained. They have to have mom there, providing them with things to do or shuffling them from one activity to another. So in the end, my writing time has become a great benefit to my family.

I also feel it’s beneficial for my kids to see Mom doing big things. It gives them confidence in their own interests. If mom can think up an idea, work hard, and produce a book . . . why can’t they follow their dreams?

My writing also expands my kids’ vision. For instance, my kids hear me talk about my travels and/or the people I interview. Expanding our horizons and connecting with others become common place.

Then again, there is another person effected by my writing. My husband John has always been my biggest cheerleader. He believed in me long before anyone else. Even today he listens to my ideas and gives me great feedback. He’s put up with my trips (to writing conferences, speaking events, book conventions), and he understands when I sometimes get too carried away at the bookstore ($$$!). Also, as I grow as a writer, I also grow in all areas of my life. I honestly feel I’m a better wife due to the lessons I’ve learned on this writing path.

And personally, I feel I’m also a stronger person because of my path to publication. Writing has opened new doors for me, and it has helped me become more confident. Writing makes me happy . . . and a happy wife is a good wife and mom.

Also, I feel this career is in line with the Proverbs 31 woman. (Who can forget her?) Whether she was reality, or a mere symbol, who this woman was in Christ made the difference in all areas of her life. The Proverbs 31 woman not only focused on her family, she also used her creative talents for God’s glory . . . and her husband and children rose to call her blessed!

Also, as children of God, we NEED to feel like what we do fulfills our God-given dreams. These dreams matter. In my opinion, too many women pour so much into their families that they no longer feel there is any of “them” left. Even taking one small step, followed by another, helps us to feel like we’re making progress in following God’s dreams.

Of course, balance is everything. I’ve really had to learn when to stop for the day. I usually keep my writing to afternoons. My kids get my mornings (through homeschool) and my husband and family get my evenings. Once my husband’s home for the day, I’m around. I cook dinner and spend time in the evenings with him. I’m sure I could get a lot more accomplishing (writing-wise) if I turned everything over to him and ran upstairs for free writing time, but my marriage is too important for that.

I’ve also had to come up with “management tips” for life.

1. I plan all my errands for one or two days. Running to the store, post office, etc. everyday would be a BIG time killer.

2. I’ve trained my kids to take part in household chores. My oldest son does all the floors and trash removal. My youngest son sets and clears the table and puts the food away. He also cares for our pets and gathers all the dirty laundry. My daughter does all the dishes and keeps the kitchen clean. It’s great training and a big help for mom!

3. I hire someone to come in a clean for four or five hours every few weeks. It’s been so worth the cost—both for writing time and my peace of mind.

Balancing family and writing is never easy, but I try to keep my priorities straight. They old saying goes, “You’ll never get to the end of your life and say, I wish I would have worked more.”

Finally, my writing benefits from these priorities too. When it comes to putting words on the page, I just do it. Since I have kids I have to sit down and produce. There’s no letting my mind wander, no playing around on the computer. And I actually think that because of this I get a lot more done than others I know who have all day to write.

My family is also my inspiration. They have shown me how to love, how to cry, how to rejoice. My writing would be flat and lifeless without those I love most.