prayer

September 20, 2023 by Tricia Goyer Leave a Comment

How Prayer Changes the Future for Adoption

I’d like to think I’m an expert pray-er. I can clearly see how my prayers changed things. For example, I’ve had seven kids—not birthed from me—running around my house who are examples of that. Yet, the way that my prayers changed the future is different than you think.

God is not a genie in a bottle.

My prayers weren’t effective because I figured out the right words to make God do what I wanted to do. I used to think that. As a young Christian, I’d try all sorts of things:

praying in the morning
praying at night
praying on my knees
praying out loud
journaling my prayers

I wouldn’t admit it out loud, but I believed deep down if I said the right things, at the right time, in the right way, that God could be swayed.

What I’ve since discovered is God has good plans for my life. He has hopes for me and a future.

The number-one thing that changes when I pray . . . is me.

Prayer opens up the connection between me and God. Prayer softens my heart to His will.

My prayers change the future because as I connect with Him, I’m willing to submit my will to His. As I submit and walk in His ways . . . my future is different than the path I would have taken myself on in my own according. And the future is changed.

Prayer changes the future because:

I connect with God.
I submit my will to His.
I walk in His ways—not the ones I try to figure out.

I have dozens of examples of this, but I’ll quickly share one: adoption. Around 2000, I started praying for God to give me His heart. Soon I became interested in adopting. God tells us so many times to care for the widows and orphans.

My husband wasn’t on board, so I continued to pray (not nag). In 2007, John brought up the idea to me (yes!), and we filled out paperwork to adopt from China.

By the time we submitted our paperwork in 2008, the adoption Chinese program changed drastically, and the opportunity to adopt a healthy baby girl was no longer an option. By 2009, when I discovered I’d not have a Chinese baby anytime soon (or ever), I was crushed. I cried (I’ll admit it), but I also prayed for God’s will.

“Lord, give us the child YOU desire. I know you placed adoption on my heart for a reason.”

I’m telling the complete truth when I say that the very day I relinquished my will, I received a phone call about a birth mom looking for a home for her baby. March 2010, Alyssa joined our family—a nine-pound bundle of joy.

Even after bringing Alyssa home, I continued to pray for God’s will. (Lord, are there more children that you have for us?)

In 2012 Bella and Casey joined our home from the foster care system. Later on, God placed Lauren, Jordan, Maria, and Florentina into our lives. I love my children! I couldn’t imagine life without them. More than that, I know God placed adoption on my heart for a reason; it just didn’t look the way I thought.

Prayer changed the future because:

I connected with God, and I discovered His heart.
I submitted my will to His, and I relinquished myself to His path.
I walked in His ways, . . . and He led me where I never expected.

Today, consider changing your future forever.

God has good plans for your life. He knows you’ll only be willing to step out into the future when your heart is changed through prayer.

How Prayer Changes the Future for Adoption

As you submit yourself to His heart and His will, expect to walk down paths different than you ever expected. You’ll learn how prayer changes the future for adoption. Also, expect to have a partner in the journey. God—yes, the God of the universe!—will be stepping out in front of you along the way and leading you in His plans.

As we continued to pray God continued to lead. Today, we have ten beautiful children. We are so blessed. And it all began when we let God changed our future through prayer.

Are you new here? You might want to subscribe to my email updates, or follow me on Facebook, Pinterest, Google+, or Instagram.

Disclosure of Material Connection: Some of the links in the post above are “affiliate links.” This means if you click on the link and purchase the item, I will receive an affiliate commission. Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will add value to my readers. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”

September 18, 2023 by Tricia Goyer 2 Comments

3 Ways You’re a Leader- And How to Be a Better One

Many people are confused about the term “family leader.” As I’ve blogged about moms being leaders, I’ve had both men and women pipe up, “But wait, the man’s supposed to be the leader in the home, right?” Yes, but women are leaders, too, in many ways you may not realize.

1. In your role as spouse –
Yes, friends, I believe in the “S” word: submission. I believe God has called men to be the spiritual head of the home and the ones to care for and provide for his wife and family and lead the family unit. I believe wives come under their headship in willing submission . . . yet women are leaders, too.

Any time you strive to guide the thoughts, behavior, or direction of another person, you are leading! Or, as John Quincy Adams said, “If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more, and become more, you are a leader.”

Go ahead, read that again. Mom, you are a leader! Wife, you are a leader! Your thoughts and attitudes guide your closest relationships. Family leadership can be as intimate as offering words of guidance and encouragement to a discouraged loved one, or it can be as directive as issuing specific instructions on how to drive the family car.

2. In your community –
A man or a woman’s role in leadership also extends beyond the four walls of the home. Just think of your roles at your work, at your child’s school, and in your neighborhood. Influence can also be exhibited in your roles as church volunteers and community leaders. These are important roles in our everyday lives, especially since many couples today are often not well-connected with siblings and parents. Many families are spread out, living far from extended family members. This causes many couples to create their own “family units” with like-minded friends. These are the people they vacation with and spend free time with. Seeking God in these roles is important; it’s then that couples realize they can be a positive influence in their church and community outside of their own home.

3. In your extended family –
Sometimes this is the hardest place to be a leader. We can’t choose our relatives, and sometimes the relationships with parents, siblings, aunts, uncle, and cousins can be the hardest. Often people are put into “roles” within their family. Yet in your actions and reactions, you are showing leadership—whether you like it or not.

In each of these areas, you make an impact! As a leader you . . .

Build enduring relationships within the home that can have far-reaching impact beyond the home
Set the basic direction of life values, character development, and relational behavior
Involve seasons of personal sacrifice to promote the spiritual and physical well-being of others
Sustain love, loyalty, trust, mercy, forbearance, forgiveness, and sacrifice
Mature and grow
Foster values of love, compassion, trust, commitment, honesty, and grace within its members.

Think your role in leadership doesn’t matter? Think again. The number-one way you can be better in each of these areas is to pray.

Today take a few minutes to pray for your role as a leader.

Pray for your leadership in your family.
Pray for your leadership in your church.
Pray for your leadership in your neighborhood.
Pray for your leadership at work and school.
Pray that God will show you how to lead.
 Pray you will submit to His leadership in your life.

The impact we can have in the lives of people around us can’t be underestimated . . . and only prayer prepares us for the work ahead!

August 30, 2023 by Tricia Goyer Leave a Comment

Letting Your Husband Lead

I have to say it wasn’t always easy for me to let John lead. When he and I married in 1990, I was a single mom of a little boy. I was used to making all the rules, so allowing John to lead was really a struggle.

I wanted to set Cory’s bedtime. I wanted to set the rules for discipline. I thought I knew best; after all, I was the mom, and I read all the parenting magazines.

Over time, I realized Cory needed his dad to be a leader. (Otherwise, how would he know how to lead his own family someday?) So I stepped back, and John led the way. He was firmer than I was but also full of grace and compassion. He made our son toe the line, and amazingly Cory started acting better and obeying better, and all of our relationships grew!

It was harder, though, letting John lead me spiritually.

I was the one who listened to Christian music all day. I was the one who attended Bible study at church. I was the one who had shelves full of devotional books. I made suggestions of how we should do devotions, or pray at dinner, or have family worship time, but the louder I got with my suggestions, the more John pulled away. This frustrated me to no end!

I clearly remember one morning during my personal quiet time when I felt God’s whispers, telling me I was doing a horrible job at being John’s personal Holy Spirit. What?! I was just trying to help … wasn’t I?

I knew then I needed to pray—and to keep my mouth shut. So I did. And things got better. When I stepped back, John stepped forward. He didn’t do things my way, but he was leading and we were drawing closer to God and each other.

Even today, there is a struggle, but I’m working at it. These are things that allow me to help my husband lead on a daily basis:

Praying for God to give John wisdom and praying for my tender heart, so I’ll follow.
Instead of giving my opinion, asking John for his advice. He’s a very smart guy when I take time to listen!
Encouraging my husband when he’s making great choices. For example, when John suggested we read and pray together in the morning, I made sure I was ready and available to do that … even if kids were running around and dozens of other things needed to be done.
Providing courage. I’ve learned the men in our lives are often afraid of failing, so it’s easier for them to do nothing than step out of their comfort zone. I try to let John know I’m willing to stick by him and to cheer him on. I also ask what I can to do support him, and I try to follow through.

It’s also a great example to our kids as they see me giving preference to my husband, and they see John loving and providing as only he can.

P.S. That little boy? Well, he’s grown now, too. And he’s leading his wife and baby son, just like he saw his daddy do.

Are you looking to make praying together with your husband a priority in your marriage?

Give my book Praying Through the Bible in One Year a try! It’s a great resource for your own time alone with God or as a way to build a strong prayer foundation with your partner. God can bring real transformation into your heart and life when you daily commit to reading your Bible and praying through God’s Word. Praying through the Bible in One Year offers a guided reading plan and a daily prayer starter to help you make God’s Word applicable to your life. Discover the inspiration for real-life transformation. Get yours today here!

August 23, 2023 by Pamela Black Leave a Comment

6 Ways to Effectively Lead Young Children

What does it mean for a parent of a family to effectively lead young children?

The answer to that question has come to me through years of trial and error (mostly error). As a young mom, I didn’t give leadership much thought — I was just trying to get through the day. But as my kids grew beyond the toddler years, I realized something important: Kids do what they see. They believe in what is prioritized at home. That meant I was a leader. I had to lead young children whether I liked it or not.

My leadership grew right along with our three kids. Then, when those kids became teens and young adults, my husband, John, and I adopted seven children and started all over again. Seeing what worked — and what didn’t — the first time around made me more confident as a leader the second time. Also, seeing my older kids as adults confirmed what we did right.

6 Ways to Effectively Lead Young Children

Setting Family Priorities

The values and priorities you model in good times and bad are likely to become the values and priorities your kids adopt as adults. These are the things they will pass down to their kids, too. So we want to make sure they pick up the right things! Here are six ways I have found to effectively lead little ones:

1. Trust

Yes, it really does matter if you go out for ice cream after naptime if that’s what you promised. It’s easy to follow a leader we trust. Kids are quick to follow when they know you care about them, consistently meet their needs and keep your promises. The more instances where we do what we say, the more our children become willing to follow. Also, trust built in the early years forms a strong connection that will help kids to turn to you in the tumultuous teen years.

2. Belonging

What is your family all about? What makes you a special group of people? Let your kids know they are an important part of your family. Be sure to point out their best qualities, and let them see how you need them and they need you. Of course, words are not enough. Make your child a part of the team by giving them simple chores, such as setting the table, sorting the laundry, or pulling weeds in the yard. Point out how their small efforts benefit the family as a whole.

3. Focus

Where you place your focus will direct how your family spends their days. John and I worked together to determine what things were important for our children’s futures. Then we decided how to make those things important now. Because we want our children to have a relationship with God as teens and adults, we have a time of daily Bible reading and prayer with our kids now. We attend church and serve other Christians by volunteering in children’s church. We collect baby items for our local teen-mom support group to model helping those in need. These small but consistent acts demonstrate that we put God first as a family and build a strong foundation for our children’s future faith.

4. Flexibility

As children grow, priorities change. It’s important to set routines, but it’s also important to be flexible. Nobody enjoys being around a rigid leader. If something you did last year doesn’t work this year, be willing to try something new. Different strategies may work with different personalities of children, so be prepared to change things up.

5. Boundaries

Leadership isn’t just about where you go, but also what you protect. I’ve learned to say no to a lot of good things to protect the best things. For us, we value family dinners, evening togetherness, and reading together. To do these things, we’ve had to say no to a lot of outside activities. We believe that, at some point in the future, it will be more important for us to have a family bond than for each of our kids to be part of a different activity that fills up our evenings. There is plenty of time in our children’s future for them to pursue leisure activities, but these childhood years — with everyone together — are fleeting.

6. Perspective

Finally, as parents, it’s up to us to create a vision for the type of family we want to be. That’s why my husband and I explain to our kids that the things our family focuses on may look different from what other families are emphasizing. This also provides us with opportunities to talk to them about how the priorities of those who follow God should look different from those of people who don’t.

Maybe your focus is on debt-free living rather than extravagant vacations. Perhaps you choose to give to your church instead of buying brand-name clothes. Use these practices to talk to your children about the charge to believers found in Romans 12:2: “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.” Ask your children to join you in making these decisions, teaching them what God’s Word says.

Start Strong!

Being a family leader means choosing where you want to lead; once you make good choices, you’ve already done half the work. There are so many decisions we have to make on a daily basis as parents, but when you make solid decisions based on God’s Word while your children are young, it will be easier to lead well in the seasons to come.

2 Parents + 8 Kids + 1 Grandma = A house full of chaos, mess, and noise!

And between homeschooling, writing, and leading a Teen MOPS group — I definitely get frustrated and cranky at times.

But you know what bothered me the most? Hearing my kids complaining. It drove me crazy until I realized I could teach them something better.

I could teach them gratitude. We could learn to be a family that’s grateful and thankful. Together we could become Grumble Free.

Would a year be enough to teach us all to focus on God’s goodness through every opportunity?

We found out in our Grumble Free Year and now you can read about how we faced whining and complaining head-on and became a stronger family because of it!

www.thegrumblefreeyear.com

Download your free GFY Scripture Color Sheets!

August 2, 2023 by Tricia Goyer 2 Comments

Just Be Available to God

Just Be Available

If you want God to work in your life, then just be available! Be available AND believe He will move on your behalf. You have to believe this. If you don’t believe in a BIG God with BIG dreams there’s no use being available. When you learn to trust God completely and trust in His dreams, THEN you can also trust Him to lead you down the right path. Let me tell you how I know!

Fifty-two years ago, there was a woman about to give birth. She was young and didn’t know how she could afford a child without her parent’s help. She hadn’t talked to her former boyfriend in months–she didn’t even know how to reach him. How could she tell him she was having his child?

This young woman attended church some, yet her dialogue with God was stilted. How could God let this happen to her? What would her life be like now?

A baby girl was born, and upon holding her child this young lady knew things would be okay. Perhaps this baby was a gift, not a burden as she supposed. So this woman raised her daughter the best she could, and while she wanted to give her child more than she had…

History has a way of repeating itself.

When the daughter became a young woman she found herself in the same situation—living at home, pregnant, scared. The daughter knew she could raise this child. After all, her mom had done it. But what would her life be like? How could God let this happen to her?

If you haven’t guessed already – I was the daughter.

I was born to a single mom, becoming a single mom myself as a teenager. At age seventeen, God gave me a son. My boyfriend was out of the picture, and I faced raising a child alone with little education, no money, and – maybe, according to the world – little hope for my future.

Now if you take this story at face value, I am nothing more than a statistic.

According to government research, most daughters of young mothers go on to be teen mothers themselves. They face lives of hardship, living on welfare for the most part—becoming a burden rather than an asset to society.

Yet, I am not a statistic. And you know why I’m not a statistic? Because God doesn’t do statistics.

Did you hear that?

God doesn’t do statistics. In fact, He likes to blow them out of the water.

You see, God has a history of seeing something that no one else does. Like seeing a king in a shepherd boy named David, seeing an apostle in a young zealot named Paul, and seeing a mighty warrior in a frightened nobody named Gideon.

God has X-ray eyes that see right through any outward characteristics or any national statistics. His X-ray eyes scan down to the heart.

And what did God see? He must have seen something worthwhile. Because . . .

At age 52, I’m a multi-published author of magazine articles, Bible study notes, curriculum, and many books. My book for teenage mothers was nominated for a prestigious award. I’m a national speaker, traveling to share God’s good news.

While in my twenties I helped to launch a Crisis Pregnancy Center, helped start numerous abstinence programs, and launched support groups for Teen Moms.

Just Be Available

Now, if I were not a believer, all these would be things I could really tout. But honestly, I can say that it doesn’t have to do with me at all.

It’s about:

A BIG God with BIG dreams.
A God who has made an agreement with me that is eternal, final, and sealed.
A God who is constantly looking after my safety and success.
A God who is strong in my weakness.
A God who sees the future sees the past and has a perfect plan for me.

Well, I guess the whole truth is that I do have something to do with it. It’s only a little something, but I guess it makes a pretty big difference.

See, God can be all those things in my life, but only if I let Him.

There is one thing I must do . . . and that is Be Available. Of course, I didn’t just wake up one day and say, “Here I am, God – use me.” I didn’t just clear my schedule and wait for God to show up.

Rather, the steps toward my availability were a work in progress. They started on the day I was six months pregnant and accepted Jesus Christ as my personal Savior. I like to look at that as Day One.

In those 34 years from then to now, I’ve learned a lot.

Lesson #1: Sometimes being available means stepping away from the status quo.

For me, that meant moving 1,000 miles away. Seriously, 1,000 miles. You see after I gave my heart to the Lord, I birthed a beautiful son. Not too long later, God gave me an amazing, Christian husband and two more children. Then He asked us to move . . . (in a roundabout way.)

First, God put us into a community of like-minded people. Our friends longed for a simple life away from the hurry and worry in California.

Next, He placed a desire in our hearts to raise our children in a better place – a place called Montana. We’d talked about it with our friends, we’d dreamt about it, and hoped that many someday it would come true.

Then, we decided to pray. My husband and I got on our knees and prayed that IF it was God’s desire He would make it clear. John had just graduated from college, and I was raising three small children under the age of 5.

We knew we’d be leaving our families, leaving our friends, leaving everything we knew. We had no job in Montana, no money to move; in fact, we’d never even been there before! Still, we had a desire. One we couldn’t shake.

At the time, my husband sold computers on commission in a small store. He’d usually sell 1-2 a week. He went to work the next day after our joint-prayer, and sold 11 computers! Enough to pay off our current bills with enough left over to move and live on. It was the confirmation we’d been looking for.

So we did it. We packed up our three kids and moved. Our families thought we were crazy.

They were sure we were joining some commune or something. We saw Kalispell for the first time as we drove in with our stuff. Within the week, we were renting a house. Within three weeks, my husband had a far better job than he had in California. And within six months, we’d purchased our first house. In less than a year, we were plugged into an amazing church and ministering to children in ways we’d always dreamed of.

We serve a BIG God with BIG dreams.

You have to believe this. If you don’t believe in a BIG God with BIG dreams there’s no use being available. But when you trust that fact. Trust God completely. Trust His dreams, THEN you can also trust Him to lead you to the right path.

Seeing God at work and what He did with our lives when we were available made me hungry for more. I wanted to experience God at work like that again.

Henry and Mel Blackaby say, “Watching the activity of God from a distance can never compare with the thrill of being fully involved in the Spirit’s active work.”

You have to want God. Not just want to work for Him or learn about Him, but truly want Him. You have to want to experience Him at work in your life. You have to be hungry for what only He can give—a hope and a future.

Prayer

God, I want to trust you. I want to be available for the big plans you have for me. Lead me to the right path. I am hungry for a hope and a future.

What BIG DREAM is God whispering into your heart? Maybe, like me, you feel God pulling you towards words, towards writing and speaking and sharing His message. If that sounds familiar then maybe you need to join me in the Write That Book club!

Making your writing dreams become a reality is tough. You have ideas but you wonder if any of them are good. You have no idea how to connect with agents and editors, and what in the world is book proposal anyway?

I’m here to help, and I’ve invited some of my friends to help you, too. They are professional agents, editors, authors, and marketing and publicity team members. They’re the best of the best in the Christian publishing industry. Together, we want to help you reach your dreams.

To help you do this, I’ve created Write That Book. This premier group provides education, inspiration, and connection with other writers and experts. Learn all the tricks of the trade while getting your personal questions answered.

Over thirty experts will be available throughout the month to answer your questions. Their decades of experience will be at your fingertips. They not only want to help you, but they also want to get to know you better. After all, your words might just be the ones they’re looking for!

Learn more here:

July 17, 2023 by Tricia Goyer Leave a Comment

It’s Time to Get Creative, Mom.

As a writer, I know all about creativity. I know how essential it is to be creative. I know how fun it can be. I also know what it’s like to be at a loss for creativity. Even as a mom, creativity is important. Combine the needed creativity for being both a mom and a writer . . . well, it’s tough to come by.

When there are people and paperwork and piles to manage…
When I look around my house and see the walls that need to be painted and the cupboards that should be organized…
When my inbox is cluttered with notes I need to answer about work stuff and volunteer stuff…
When output is more than input…
…my creativity well often runs dry.

What can you do when you need an extra “spark” of inspiration?

Here are a few things I do.

Call a funny friend.

Sit outside. Breathe in fresh air.

Listen to birds sing. Watch busy ants.

Open a book of poetry or rent an audio book of poetry from the library. Absorb the symbolism and fresh word combinations.

Open a cookbook to a random page, then go shopping for the needed ingredients. (And then cook it!)

Go to YouTube.com and watch old dance numbers like this one.

Visit Etsy and take their taste test. This is one of my favorites. I love the fresh colors, textures, and ideas.

Play with Visuwords. Follow word trails and see where they lead you.

Have a visual feast on iStock Photo. (It’s also a great place for gathering inspiration for novel settings and characters or blog ideas.)

Pray and thank God for His creativity. Thank Him for your favorite places, people, tastes, and the beauty of nature.

Read your favorite Bible verses in a translation or paragraph you normally don’t read. Here is my favorite Bible verse in The Message (Zephaniah 3:17): “Don’t be afraid. Dear Zion, don’t despair. Your God is present among you, a strong Warrior there to save you. Happy to have you back, he’ll calm you with his love and delight you with his songs.”

Write a greeting card verse and e-mail it to a special person. Or better yet, browse creative sites (like MarthaStewart.com) for card ideas and make your own.

Sometimes what we need is simply a break in our day from the mundane tasks of life.

These tips are perfect for breaking up a routine. Who knows? You might end up inspired to finish writing that blog or to tackle that inbox.

Prayer

God, thank you for being the source of all creativity. Allow today to be inspired with fresh ideas and new creativity.

Looking for More Ways to Get Creative?

Check out my book Balanced: Finding Center as a Work-at-Home Mom!

More Resources

A More Beautiful Question: The Power of Inquiry to Spark Breakthrough Ideas by Warren Berger

Creativity by Matthew Fox

Creative Block: Get Unstuck, Discover New Ideas. Advice & Projects from 50 Successful Artists by Danielle Krysa

Creativity Workout: 62 Exercises to Unlock Your Most Creative Ideas by Edward De Bono

July 12, 2023 by Tricia Goyer 1 Comment

Your Prayers DO Impact Generations {And 5 Things to Pray}

Do your prayers matter—not just for today or this year—but for generations? Can the prayers you pray today and the faith steps you take this week impact your descendants 100 years from now? Yes, they can! Your prayers do impact GENERATIONS!

We all want to know our prayers matter, but sometimes our greatest prayers may not be answered until our life on earth is done. In fact, you may think you’re praying about one thing, but God might use those prayers greater in the lives of your descendants than your own. How do I know?

I have a few stories to share.

The first is about a woman named Corrie ten Boom. The second is my own.

Many may know Corrie’s story from the book The Hiding Place. (If you haven’t read The Hiding Place, run—don’t walk—to read it.) It’s one of my all-time favorite books.

Corrie was a single woman living with her family in The Netherlands during World War II. When the Nazis occupied Holland Corrie and her family hid hundreds of Jewish people in their home and helped them to safety. Because of their efforts, countless lives were saved.

I’d like to think that if I was in Corrie’s shoes I’d do the same. But would I? Putting oneself at risk to save others is unnatural. Corrie saved lives, but she also saw her own family lose their lives because of these actions. Corrie’s father died not long after his arrest. Corrie and her sister Betsy were placed into a concentration camp where Betsy lost her life. Only Corrie was released from the concentration camp due to a clerical error.

What does Corrie’s story have to do with us today? God has a plan for our families, and sometimes those plans take a generation of prayers for preparation. Here is more of the story I wrote in my book Prayers that Changed History:

Prayer came naturally to Corrie. Her parents made prayer an important part of her life. Her parents taught her to pray, and they lived an example of prayer. Corrie’s grandfather, Willem ten Boom, felt the need to pray for Jewish people after a movie worship service. The ten Boom family, along with friends and neighbors, started a weekly prayer meeting for Jewish people in 1844. Every week they specifically prayed for the peace of Jerusalem as talked about in Psalm 122:6. “Pray for the peace of Jerusalem: they shall prosper that love thee” (KJV). These meetings took place every week for one hundred years. They stopped on February 28, 1944, when Nazi soldiers came to the house to take the family away.

I get goosebumps when I read that! God knew what the ten Boom family would face in 1944, and he started preparing them in 1844! The strength this family exhibited during a crisis in their country is a direct result of generations of prayer.

I love this story because it’s reflective of my life, too. I was born to a single mom in 1971, and my mother and grandmother became Christians when I was in second grade. I didn’t know my biological father until I was 28 years old, and for most of my life I believed it was only in this century my family became God-followers. I was wrong.

When talking with my biological grandfather after I met him, I discovered an amazing Christian heritage. On my paternal side my great-grandparents were missionaries and church planters, as they had been for GENERATIONS. My great-great-great-great-great grandfather FCD Wyneken was a pastor and missionary who helped found Concordia Theological Seminary.

And according to Wikipedia, “The Wyneken family had an established Lutheran heritage long before Friedrich arrived in America. Heinrich Wyneken’s father, grandfather, and one brother were pastors in Hanover. Two of Friedrich Wyneken’s older brothers also became pastors. Significant numbers of more distant relatives and in-laws were also Lutheran clergy members.”

I’d like to think that somewhere in that long line of pastors and missionaries, someone was praying for future generations. I am a direct result of those prayers, as are my kids. And who knows how MY prayers will impact generations to come.

Knowing this about the ten Boom family and my own makes me want to become more proactive about praying for my descendants. I’ll never know how my prayers will impact history. Or how yours will, too.

If you’re interested in praying for your descendants, here are some prayers to start:

Praying for Descendants

Pray for their Salvation. (Romans 10:9-10)
Pray for them to follow God’s call on their lives. (Romans 11:29)
Pray for them to be witnesses for Christ in all the world (Acts 1:8)
Pray they will live for God and turn from the draw of this world (Romans 12:2)
Pray they will be able to stand strong in their faith no matter what they face in their generation (1 Corinthians 16:13)

Print this list (click on the image below for a printable PDF) and pray these prayers often. You never know who they will impact or how!

Download the printable to remember how to pray for your family!

June 19, 2023 by Tricia Goyer 3 Comments

In My Dreams: The Struggle with Comparing Ourselves to Others

As believers, we all know we are special creations, unique and precious to God. Yet why do we struggle with comparing our lives, our bodies, our kids, and our talents (or lack of talents) with others? In reality, we need to look past who we “dream” to be and consider God’s dreams instead.

In God’s word, we read: “God-of-the-Angel-Armies speaks: ‘Exactly as I planned, it will happen. Following my blueprints, it will take shape,” says Isaiah 14:24 (The Message).

The word “planned” here is translated as “compare.” [i] It’s as if God has weighed the different possibilities, looked at them from all angles, and then chose the best way. He makes the blueprints . . . then He constructs them into our reality.

This is the life the Lord has constructed for us. Not the life, body, health, or circumstances we wished we’d had. Or the perfect life we can never attain. But the blueprints and the form He is forming into reality.

“Remember your history, your long and rich history. I am God, the only God you’ve had or ever will have—from the beginning telling you what the ending will be, all along letting you in on what is going to happen, amazing you,” we read in Isaiah 46:10-11. “I’m in this for the long haul, I’ll do exactly what I set out to do.” (The Message)

It’s okay to have longings.

But even before we worry about what we desire for our lives, the first step is to not let our dreams motivate us, but instead let His.

God has longings for us even greater than we imagine, and He’s willing to tell us these things as we seek Him out.

All of us have a problem with comparing. How do we deal with it? (Revised from Tricia’s book Generation NeXt Parenting.)

1. Discover your passion . . . and be okay with it.

“Be sure to do what you should, for then you will enjoy the personal satisfaction of having done your work well,” says Galatians 6:4, “and you won’t need to compare yourself to anyone else. For we are each responsible for our own conduct” (NLT).

As long as I can stand before my Maker and see pleasure in His eyes, why do I wonder about what others think . . . or worry I don’t measure up? When I seek God, do what He asks, find joy where my passion lies, and feel His pleasure, then comparisons won’t matter.

2. Cultivate a Quiet, Happy Heart.

“God, I’m not trying to rule the roost, I don’t want to be king of the mountain. I haven’t meddled where I have no business or fantasized grandiose plans,” says Psalm 131:1-2. “I’ve kept my feet on the ground, I’ve cultivated a quiet heart. Like a baby content in its mother’s arms, my soul is a baby content.” (The Message)

God’s arms are open to us, and He wants nothing more than for us to be content there. We don’t need to be king of the mountain, queen of the slim and beautiful, prince of the popular, or princess of grandiose plans. Through prayer and focus on God, our quiet hearts will remind us He is enough.

3. Conform to Christ.

“Conforming to the image of God is a long and steady process of internal change as we abide in Christ. People simply do not change overnight, nor can they be forced to do so,” write Neil Anderson and Robert Saucy, authors of The Common Made Holy. “Abiding in Christ is being yoked to the gentle Jesus (Matthew 11:29).” [ii][ii]

If we are connected with Jesus, have a quiet heart, and focused on our passions … what is there to compare? God has us just where He wants us … in His hands.

What can be better than that?

Additional Resources

Want to learn more about soul care and having a Happy Heart? Heart Happy: Staying Centered in God’s Love through Chaotic Circumstances will inspire you to stay tethered to the Lover of your soul. By taking time to make your heart happy in the Lord, you’ll grow closer to the Heavenly Father, fostering true transformation from the inside out. Peace and joy can be yours—no matter what life dishes up.

Have you ever wondered what can be gained by cheering each other on? On this episode of The Tricia Goyer Show, I chat about my book with Todd and Brooke Tilghman (Every Little Win), and how we can all use our gifts and talents to support each other. From homeschooling parent to homeschooling parent, I reached out to the Tilghmans and helped them by writing their book. But all throughout my life, I’ve benefited greatly by not comparing myself to others (I have a GREAT story about when I did, though). We can each use our gifts and talents to support each other! You’ll want to be sure to listen to the end of the episode because there is a fun surprise waiting! I know you are going to enjoy this episode.

June 14, 2023 by Tricia Goyer 1 Comment

Live Your Life’s Dream… Inspired by God

No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love him. 1 Corinthians 2:9 (NIV)

As a speaker, one of my favorite things to do is encourage the audience to “dream big.” Too many times we put God in a box.

We’re afraid to step out of our comfort zones. We forget that God created the universe and can surely He can help us with our small dreams. There are many dreams God has helped me fulfill: starting a crisis pregnancy center, leading a mission team to Europe, and writing books for a living, to name a few.

Since I’ve seen dreams come true in my own life, I like to encourage others to dream big. Yet, lately I’ve been adding a P.S. to my message. Why? Because in my good intentions, I may have led people to become discouraged instead.

One of the problems with the message “dream big” is that we let our human minds measure what “big” is. We think it has to be fame or success or a huge blog. We think it has to involve starting a ministry or sharing Christ in an atheistic country.

This doesn’t always have to be the case. What is “big” to God? The “big” thing to God is obeying what He asks you to do. You could become famous, make it big, and become well-known—and it would amount to nothing. Or you can ask God what big is to Him – you might just be surprised.

Many years ago, my husband and I felt God telling us to walk away from some of our ministry opportunities in order to adopt several children from the foster care system. I will not become famous leading family Bible studies, watching my kids play soccer, or carting kids to homeschool co-ops. But after seven adoptions, I realize that to God, these are big things.

What dream is big to God in your life?

It’s a question you need to ask. It’s wonderful to dream big… just as long as you are sure you know that the direction of your dream was inspired by your loving heavenly Father.

Faith step: Take a minute and think about the dreams God has been speaking to your heart. Write them down, even though they may not seem big to the world’s eyes. Now, what is one step you can take toward them? Write that down too.

Are you new here? You might want to subscribe to my email updates, or follow me on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Google+, or Instagram.

May 1, 2023 by Tricia Goyer 12 Comments

6 Ways to Find Joy in Your Day {Printable!}

6 Ways to Find Joy in Your Day {Printable!}

As a homeschooling mom, I’ve had kids at home for 32 years. This means noisy days, busy days, and these kids-are-giving-me-a-headache days.

I’ve been homeschooling for 28 years and still have another seven years to go! Does that seem overwhelming? It would have been if I hadn’t discovered something amazing: JOY!

Over the last year, God has spoken to my heart and encouraged me to find joy in everyday living.

Joy, even though the laundry is piled high.

Joy, even though the kids are cranky.

Joy when work deadlines are pressed.

Joy when I have a headache when my feet hurt, and when I just want a nap. (Which happens often!)

But how do you find joy in your day?

Here are 6 ways … and a Scripture verse for each!

1. Thank God for each new morning.

A thankful heart goes a long way. Daily when I wake God, instead of looking at everything I have to do, I thank him for who I am and what I have.

Thank you, God, that I’m your daughter, and I have a place in your eternal home.

Thank you, God, that I’m a wife and mother.

Thank you, God, for the pile of laundry and all the clothes you’ve provided for us.

Thank you, God, for the dishes still in the sink from last night. We went to bed with full bellies.

2. Turn on worship music.

I love listening to worship music as I read my Bible and journal in the morning. I put on popular Christian songs as we homeschool. I also listen to Christian music as I write. I love using apps like Spotify or Amazon Prime Music to help me find great music. I also sing along! Singing songs of joy helps sorrows (and frustrations) to disappear!

3. Ask God to remind me what His kingdom is all about.

In life, I want to be comfortable. I want my house to be Pinterest-worthy. I want my kids to shine. But when I think about God’s kingdom, He helps me understand Kingdom Work. Opening my door to neighbors. Sharing God’s truth with young moms. Calling a friend who’s going through a hard time. Playing a board game with my kids instead of putting away the laundry. The Kingdom is about people and hearts–not tasks!

4. Seek the Holy Spirit.

When did I ever start thinking that I have to handle life alone? God has given us His Holy Spirit to fill, work through, and give us peace. Stopping to pray and ask for God’s Holy Spirit to help me makes a huge difference. The Holy Spirit gives me joy when I have none.

The Holy Spirit gives me joy when I have none. @TriciaGoyer

Click To Tweet

5. Join the kids in praising God.

The best thing about having three little kids is that they LOVE to praise God. We have “Jesus dance parties” often. We put on kids praise song, clap our hands and dance and sing. They love it, and seeing their joy makes me more joyful.

6. Thank God for troubles.

The honest truth is that without troubles, I wouldn’t need God. If everything went smoothly in life I wouldn’t pray or praise as often. When I thank God for troubles, I remind myself that He has everything in control. As the Scriptures say, troubles are an opportunity for joy!

I hope you print and use these Scriptures in your day. I’ve found them very helpful.

Download here.

How about you? What do you do to find joy in your day? What’s your favorite Scripture about joy?

Prayer

Dear Heavenly Father, today I pray for my friend. I pray that she may find joy in you. I pray that Your Word will draw her heart to you. I thank you for your Holy Spirit that can plant joy deep in our hearts, even when there are struggles all around.

More Resources

14 Ways to Create a Joyful Family
How to Joyfully Share a Life
3 Ways to Lose Guilt and Find Joy
Heart Happy by Tricia Goyer
When I Don’t Desire God: How to Fight for Joy by John Piper
A Faith That Will Not Fail by Dan Lord

May 4, 2021 by Tricia Goyer Leave a Comment

How to Pray at All Times

Today, I want to share how I’ve learned to pray at all times. It’s taken me a while to feel that I understand prayer and to consider myself a praying person. But now that I do, I’m excited to share what that’s done in my life. I hope this helps you draw closer to God in prayer.

Pray at All Times

As a child, I had a misconception. For some reason, I believed that prayer was an event. I felt it was something I needed to remember to tack on at the end of my day, just like brushing my teeth before bed. It was a time when I needed to be still and come before Jesus. There are times when I do that. I love quiet mornings on my couch. Sometimes I even get on my knees before him, but I’ve grown to discover prayer is not an event; it’s a continual conversation.

Every year, I pray when I start homeschooling–seven children at one time. (I pray we all learn and get along!) This morning I prayed as I watched my son drive away in the rain. (I prayed for his protection and for a bubble to surround his car from crazy drivers.) Last night I prayed for a friend when she shared a need on Facebook. I didn’t wait until the next morning‘s quiet time to pray. As I sat in front of my computer, I closed my eyes for a moment and I asked Jesus to be with her and to give her peace.

Pray at All Times

We don’t need to wait for a certain time of day to pray; instead, we can go to Jesus anytime. Longer prayer times are important — to listen as well as to make requests to Him – but Jesus’s ear is always attuned to even our smallest request. Susanna Wesley is a good example of someone who would pray at all times. She had many struggles in her life which lead her to pray. Between raising animals for food and finances, running a household in the days when everything was done by hand, and caring for five small children while teaching two others six hours a day, she had little time to pray (but lots of reasons to!) Even though she couldn’t get away to pray alone, she would tell her children that if they saw her with her apron over her head that meant she was praying and shouldn’t be disturbed.

“Look to the Lord and His strength; seek His face always.” 1 Chronicles 16:11

Each of us can be a praying person, and today is a wonderful day to start. Whenever you hear of prayer needs during the day, pause and lift your request to Jesus. Then set a time to pray for a longer period, taking care to listen for Jesus’s whispers to your heart.

Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God‘s will for you in Christ Jesus. First Thessalonians five16–18 NIV.

How can I pray for you today friend? Reply to this email and let me know!

Warmly,

Tricia

Prayers That Changed History

For the last 2000 years, men and women who love Jesus have gladly served Him. They have gone out into their neighborhoods, towns, and the world, and Jesus has been with them. He hasn’t physically walked by their side. Instead, His Holy Spirit has been with them, leading and guiding them. We can do the same. Each of us has a special connection with the Holy Spirit when we go before God in prayer. Through prayer, we can make a difference in the world we live in too.

In Prayers That Changed History, the stories of twenty-five notable people are presented along with how prayer changed their lives and changed history. Following each historical example is a biblical story that ties to that person’s life and actions, as well as ways you can use the power of prayer in your life as well. Because God isn’t done changing the world yet, and he would love to use you to make history.

Get your copy here to learn about how ordinary people did extraordinary things through the power of God in prayer: Prayers That Changed History.