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May 1, 2023 by Tricia Goyer 12 Comments

6 Ways to Find Joy in Your Day {Printable!}

6 Ways to Find Joy in Your Day {Printable!}

As a homeschooling mom, I’ve had kids at home for 32 years. This means noisy days, busy days, and these kids-are-giving-me-a-headache days.

I’ve been homeschooling for 28 years and still have another seven years to go! Does that seem overwhelming? It would have been if I hadn’t discovered something amazing: JOY!

Over the last year, God has spoken to my heart and encouraged me to find joy in everyday living.

Joy, even though the laundry is piled high.

Joy, even though the kids are cranky.

Joy when work deadlines are pressed.

Joy when I have a headache when my feet hurt, and when I just want a nap. (Which happens often!)

But how do you find joy in your day?

Here are 6 ways … and a Scripture verse for each!

1. Thank God for each new morning.

A thankful heart goes a long way. Daily when I wake God, instead of looking at everything I have to do, I thank him for who I am and what I have.

Thank you, God, that I’m your daughter, and I have a place in your eternal home.

Thank you, God, that I’m a wife and mother.

Thank you, God, for the pile of laundry and all the clothes you’ve provided for us.

Thank you, God, for the dishes still in the sink from last night. We went to bed with full bellies.

2. Turn on worship music.

I love listening to worship music as I read my Bible and journal in the morning. I put on popular Christian songs as we homeschool. I also listen to Christian music as I write. I love using apps like Spotify or Amazon Prime Music to help me find great music. I also sing along! Singing songs of joy helps sorrows (and frustrations) to disappear!

3. Ask God to remind me what His kingdom is all about.

In life, I want to be comfortable. I want my house to be Pinterest-worthy. I want my kids to shine. But when I think about God’s kingdom, He helps me understand Kingdom Work. Opening my door to neighbors. Sharing God’s truth with young moms. Calling a friend who’s going through a hard time. Playing a board game with my kids instead of putting away the laundry. The Kingdom is about people and hearts–not tasks!

4. Seek the Holy Spirit.

When did I ever start thinking that I have to handle life alone? God has given us His Holy Spirit to fill, work through, and give us peace. Stopping to pray and ask for God’s Holy Spirit to help me makes a huge difference. The Holy Spirit gives me joy when I have none.

The Holy Spirit gives me joy when I have none. @TriciaGoyer

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5. Join the kids in praising God.

The best thing about having three little kids is that they LOVE to praise God. We have “Jesus dance parties” often. We put on kids praise song, clap our hands and dance and sing. They love it, and seeing their joy makes me more joyful.

6. Thank God for troubles.

The honest truth is that without troubles, I wouldn’t need God. If everything went smoothly in life I wouldn’t pray or praise as often. When I thank God for troubles, I remind myself that He has everything in control. As the Scriptures say, troubles are an opportunity for joy!

I hope you print and use these Scriptures in your day. I’ve found them very helpful.

Download here.

How about you? What do you do to find joy in your day? What’s your favorite Scripture about joy?

Prayer

Dear Heavenly Father, today I pray for my friend. I pray that she may find joy in you. I pray that Your Word will draw her heart to you. I thank you for your Holy Spirit that can plant joy deep in our hearts, even when there are struggles all around.

More Resources

14 Ways to Create a Joyful Family
How to Joyfully Share a Life
3 Ways to Lose Guilt and Find Joy
Heart Happy by Tricia Goyer
When I Don’t Desire God: How to Fight for Joy by John Piper
A Faith That Will Not Fail by Dan Lord

September 18, 2019 by Christen Krumm Leave a Comment

Little Foxes (and One Big One) that Can Destroy a Marriage | Sharon Jaynes

Little Foxes (and One Big One) that Can Destroy a Marriage

I was going through a drawer at my mom’s house, looking for a scratch pad, when I came across a small vinyl record. It was in a cardboard sleeve dated 1950. My dad made the record for my mom when he was in the Korean War—the first year they were married.

He talked about how much he loved her, couldn’t wait to be with her again, and how much he missed her. There was so much emotion in his voice, I could hear it crack. I listened to the scratchy recording slack-jawed. How in the world did this happen? I thought. How did this couple who obviously loved each other in the beginning, end up having such a terrible relationship filled with violent arguing and months of silent passive aggression?

From my earliest remembrance, I didn’t think my parents liked each other, much less loved each other. I spent many nights hiding in a closet with my hands over my ears to shut out the yelling. But apparently, they didn’t start out that way.

How did that happen?

How does that happen?

In the Song of Solomon, Solomon prayed that he and his Shulammite would watch out for the “little foxes” that could sneak in and sabotage the blooming vineyard of their love. (Song 2:15). But just as those foxes can sneak in and ruin a blooming relationship, they can also sneak in and wreck a mature marriage.

Little foxes are anything or anyone that can creep in and weaken a marriage. If they aren’t dealt with, little foxes become big foxes with fangs of disappoint and claws of resentment.

The list of little foxes is extensive

Yet, it can be different for every couple. One that is common for all of us is the tendency toward apathy and indifference. What the Song of Solomon shows us that indifference can happen, it did happen, and it can be avoided.

In the first two chapters of the Song of Solomon, the Shulammite, or female character, is head over heels with her man and can’t wait until they’re married. The book even begins with her saying, “Kiss me and kiss me again!” (1:2)

However, after their passionate honeymoon (which we are privy to read about), she begins to grow a bit apathetic. One night Solomon comes knocking. She’s not interested. Even though she had given him the key to her “garden,” it’s locked up and he can’t find that key.

“Not now, honey,” she says. “I’m tired. I’ve already washed my face, brushed my teeth, and put on my pj’s. Besides, I’m halfway asleep already.” (That’s my modern-day translations—not that I would know.)

We’ve all been there

Go ahead. Admit it.

The Shulammite learned an important lesson after their little spat. She made a decision to take action so the little fox of indifference wouldn’t sneak in and destroy the fruit of their marriage. Toward the end of the book, she shows us one way to prevent it. I envision her in the next stanza sauntering up to her husband as he’s overseeing the fields. She whispered in his ear, and her warm breath teased his neck. Tempting him. Flirting with him still.

Come, my beloved, let us go to the countryside,

let us spend the night in the villages.

Let us go early to the vineyards

to see if the vines have budded,

if their blossoms have opened,

and if the pomegranates are in bloom—

there I will give you my love.

The mandrakes send out their fragrance,

and at our door is every delicacy,

both new and old,

that I have stored up for you, my beloved. (Song 7:11–13)

Whoa, that might not be what you’d expect from your daily Bible reading, but God made sure it was in the Bible for a reason. I don’t think it took Solomon long to pack his bags.

How to keep passion alive

It’s up to us to recognize when the low tides of intimacy threaten to ground the boat on the sandbar of apathy. Here’s what we can learn from the Shulammite about how to keep passion alive. How to keep the Little Foxes (and One Big One) that Can Destroy a Marriage from getting in.

Be intentional. Left on its own, a fire or a marriage won’t flourish but turn to ash. It takes intentionality and ingenuity to make lifelong intimacy a reality.
Have fun together. It takes creativity and memory-making activity to weave commonalities into a life that is intertwined beyond unraveling.
Take time away from the monotony of matrimony to spend quality time together as lovers. (No kids allowed.)
Go back and do the things you did at the beginning of your relationship. As God told the Ephesians who’s love had grown cold in Revelation 2:4-5…Remember and Return.
Don’t be afraid to try something new in the bedroom. “Both new and old I have stored up for you” is a pretty good idea.
Let your spouse know that you still desire him/her.
Never stop flirting.

Lovestruck

Sharon Jaynes is a conference speaker and best-selling author of 23 books. Her latest is Lovestruck: Discovering God’s Design for Romance, Marriage, and Sexual Intimacy. To learn more about Lovestruck, visit www.lovestruckbook.com. To learn more about Sharon’s ministry and other resources, visit www.sharonjaynes.com.

About Lovestruck: Discovering God’s Design for Romance, Marriage, and Sexual Intimacy

In our sex-saturated culture, we are constantly bombarded by destructive, unrealistic depictions of romance and intimacy. But is the real problem that we focus on sex too much—or that we value sex too little? Do we really understand, let alone practice, the wondrous gift of intimacy between a husband and a wife?

In Lovestruck, bestselling author and Bible teacher Sharon Jaynes takes us back to the Bible’s beautiful picture of romantic love, a picture that is explicit but not illicit, sensual but not sordid, daring but not dirty. With the words of the Song of Solomon as a backdrop, Jaynes argues that sexual intimacy is so much more than a physical act while exploring the concepts of giving and receiving affection, pleasure; restoring romance in the mundane; avoiding the dangers of growing indifference; and committing to a covenant forever kind of love. By pursuing the sacred blessings of sexual intimacy in marriage and understanding God’s original intent, we find the freedom to enjoy and experience one of the Father’s most magnificent gifts.

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September 16, 2019 by Tricia Goyer Leave a Comment

How to Enjoy Motherhood Without the Mom Guilt

Recently I had the opportunity to chat with Jennifer Blossom of Blossoming Mom & Baby about how to enjoy motherhood without the mom guilt. It was a great conversation full of help and hope for moms in the trenches.

Blossoming Mom and Baby is all about supporting moms through the journey of motherhood.

Their belief is that you were created to THRIVE in your motherhood journey and not just going through the motions or mundane. No more complaining your way through motherhood. And no more fueling your body and mind with things that have zero (or negative) value. They believe it’s time to get on the right path for your life and motherhood. AND it’s never (EVER!) too late to start. They’re there right now with a fresh cup of coffee and a welcoming hand to invite you into the most supportive motherhood community in the world.

Jennifer and her team want you to remember, the way you show up and care for yourself MATTERS. When you learn how to take care of yourself mentally, physically, spiritually, emotionally, and within your home~ your life (and the life of those around you) will forever change.

Listen in here:

https://www.blossomingmommyandbaby.com/podcast/2019/8/12/416-motherhood-without-the-mom-guilt-with-tricia-goyer

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August 13, 2019 by Tricia Goyer 1 Comment

Cultivate A Redesigned Life {A Guest Post}

Today on the blog we welcome Tracy Steel, author of A Redesigned Life.

Enter below for a chance to win a copy of A Redesigned Life! Winner will be e-mailed. Note: This post contains affiliate links.

All of us are living a life we did not design, but one that God is redesigning for us. Like a human interior designer or artist uses a set of design principles to help them create, God uses his own set of codes to create a couture life for each of us. Recognizing what these are is key to uncovering the purposes of God when life doesn’t go as planned.

In her new book, A Redesigned Life, author Tracy Steel considers six principles of design and how God also uses the principles of movement, emphasis, pattern, contrast, balance, and space to redesign our lives. Each of these principles enable us to uncover something spectacular about the purposes of our creative God. The following excerpt from her new book focuses on the principle of emphasis and how it helps us to see the no’s of God differently.

Pops of color and the no’s of God

Emphasis creates a focal point in a design which brings attention to the element or area that is most important. . . .

If everything is emphasized (all the text is large and bold, all the images are animated, everything is in bright colors) nothing will stand out, and grab the viewer’s attention. If everything is emphasized, nothing is.[i]

I love simple and elegant design. We’ve all seen pictures of a living room with its crisp white walls and cream sofa. Imagine a coffee table in the middle of that living room. On top of the table sits a glass vase filled with a bouquet of orange tulips or powder blue hydrangeas. Or perhaps there is a turquoise-and-white paisley pattern rug under the coffee table. Maybe there is a large abstract oil painting hanging on the wall composed of green, blue, and purple horizontal stripes. Our eyes are drawn to the flowers, to the rug, or to the oil painting because of the pop of color they provide among all the white. This is the essence of emphasis as a design principle. Emphasis makes us stop, helping us focus. A designer uses shapes, texture, or color to create emphasis.

Imagine the same living room but now everything in it is red—from the couch to the walls to the flowers to the rug. I don’t want to linger or enjoy the space because it’s overwhelming and nothing grabs my attention. There’s too much red. Nothing is emphasized.

White Space

In the same way, our world is pressing us to be like an all-red room. We must be all things to all people all the time, it seems. Good at everything. Involved in everything. Know everyone. I’m tired of the pressure, of all the striving, competition, and backbiting. Give me some white space, please. I need God to give me emphasis and so do you.

God is not asking us to be all things to all people all the time. He’s the one who is capable of doing and being this. He’s the one who is all-knowing. God alone is our ever-present help and shield. We’re only to add our little pop of color into the corner of the world in which he places us. We do this through the emphasis that God has designed for each of us. The beautiful thing is, all our emphases or callings will look different. However different they may be, our little pops of color should cause others to rest the eyes of their hearts and minds upon God. And if we are doing too many things, we will be way too red or stressed out and no one will want to linger around us either.

When God Says No

But what if we really feel like we found our calling or purpose, and then it doesn’t happen? Sometimes the emphasis we wish for or desire in our hearts will not come to pass because God will say no and not allow it to happen. We may assume this is because God is not good or fair. Or maybe we believe we are not good enough for God to use us, or that God doesn’t care about the dreams or passions that we feel inside us. But this isn’t true.

Look at God’s no from a different perspective. God, because he is good and is in the process of sanctifying us, could be saying no to our good desires simply because they are not in line with the emphasis he has designed for our overall life. And God’s no enables our pop of color to be a beneficial and beautiful one. Here it is in a nutshell:

God’s no = not our emphasis.

God’s no = the revealing of his emphasis for us.

God’s no = his protection, preventing us from becoming an all-red room.

And when God says no, that means we will have the opportunity to say yes to something that he has decided is better for us, because in his providence he knows and has already designed what is to come. So if you ever thought that by now you’d be living in the city or home of your dreams and making one million dollars and, well . . . you aren’t, it’s okay to admit your disappointment or feelings of failure to yourself and to your God. Ask him to heal you of those feelings. Realize that you’re beautifully gifted to do something else with your life and that God is redesigning you so you can bless the lives of others and bring glory to him.

Don’t be all things, just be you-things.

Your emphasis matters in God’s eyes. May this encourage you whenever your life doesn’t go as planned.

Enter here to win a copy of A Redesigned Life!

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Tracy Steel graduated from Kansas State University with a BS in interior design in 1998 and has a master’s degree in biblical and theological studies from Phoenix Seminary. As a project designer, Tracy created and coordinated the design and space planning of commercial spaces for clients such as Bank One, Wells Fargo, Express Scripts, DHS, and Lockheed Martin. Moving from one type of interior design to another, Tracy then worked in full-time youth ministry, serving as the director of female students at Scottsdale Bible Church. God’s true design for Tracy now involves improving the interior space of the hearts and minds of women around her. Currently stationed in Washington, DC, this military wife and mother of two enjoys linking up with other bloggers, leading Bible studies at her local church, and speaking at various moms’ groups and women’s ministries events nationwide. She is also the author of Images of His Beauty, a 10-week Bible study for young women that focuses on identity, overcoming and healing through Christ, and bearing the image of Christ.

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Chapter 3 Living Out Your Pop of Color for God [i] Donna Tersiisky, “The ABCs of Visual Design: Emphasis,” accessed June 23, 2018▲, http://www.tersiiska.com/design/principles/.

August 6, 2019 by Tricia Goyer Leave a Comment

How to Budget for Back-to-School Expenses

Budgeting for Back-to-School Expenses

I hate to say it, but back-to-school expenses are coming. Summer has been flying by and, depending on where you are, the school year is quickly creeping up on us. Here in Georgia, school started the first week of August!

I know for me, last year was hard. Maybe that was because it was the first school year for our family of five–I wasn’t exactly sure how to budget for it. Or maybe it was because there really are so many various and unexpected school-related expenses that happen during the year.

That’s why I believe it’s important to make sure you have at least a $100 of wiggle room in your budget each month for the school year and especially back-to-school expenses. I know that sounds like a lot of money (and it definitely is.) However, chances are, when you look back over last year’s budget, you’ll notice that you come very close if not over the $100 a month for all those last-minute purchases.

How to Find Extra Cash for Back-to-School Expenses

Here are just a few ways that can hopefully help you figure out how to find an extra $100 (or more!) in your monthly budget for back-to-school expenses:

1. Cell Phones

Regardless if it’s just you and your spouse or the whole family on your phone plan, paying for cell service can be a little crazy. That’s why if you haven’t already, I highly suggest you switch over to a company like Republic Wireless (who I personally use) or Ting (several of my friends use them and love them).

You still get to have an awesome smartphone (I have the Moto G) but without the high cell phone bill (mine is only $25/mo with data!).

2. Insurance

Yeah, I know, you don’t want to talk about this subject because it’s one of those “necessary evils.” However, if you haven’t called around lately to gather new quotes for your different insurance needs, I highly suggest you do. You could save yourself hundreds of dollars a year just from a simple phone call.

3. Subscription Services

It’s happened to me before. I completely forget that I have a subscription service deducting money from my bank account. It’s like I put it on autopilot and fail to evaluate if it’s a necessary expense or not.

The next thing to do is check for any recurring subscriptions, maybe now is the time to evaluate if they are still necessary. Spend a little time going through and canceling the unnecessary ones. This should add a little more wiggle room to your budget for those back-to-school expenses.

4. Be Inconvenienced

I’m a firm believer in the fact that sometimes, we are just paying way too much for convenience. It’s possible that if we allow ourselves to be inconvenienced, we could save $1,000’s of dollars a year!

One of my favorite ways to be inconvenienced is by not using paper towels. A few years ago, we switched from using paper towels regularly to using bar mop cloths. That one small change has resulted in saving us hundreds over the years! We only have to buy one roll of paper towels twice a year (for draining meats like bacon or ground beef.) Honestly, it has affected us very little.

So, look around your home and find little ways that you could save money by simply being “inconvenienced.” You could end up adding a whole lot more to your school budget than just a $100 a month!

Don’t let this school year empty your wallet. @thebudgetmama shares 5 ways to save $$$

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What to Do with Your Savings

Those are just a few ways that you can cut your expenses before the start of the school year. But the key to not going broke this school year is to remember that once you add that wiggle room to your budget, as a result, you must make sure that you add a line item accounting for that.

For instance, let’s say you cut your cell phone bill from $100 to $30 a month (yes, that’s totally possible with Republic Wireless or Ting.) Now you have $70 of wiggle room in your budget that must be accounted for.

Now you’d want to add a line item like “School Miscellaneous” or something with $70 as the total.

Example:

Mortgage: $1,000
Utilities: $200
Car Payment: $400
Insurance: $150
Cell Phone: $30
Groceries: $500
School Miscellaneous: $70

Then whenever those random, “Hey we need each child to bring in a snack for our upcoming event on Thursday” happens, you’ll have the money ready to go in your budget. Just make sure that you account for that expense and deduct the total from your category for back-to-school expenses.

Hopefully, this helps you if you’re getting geared up for the back-to-school season. Even if this isn’t a stage of life you’re currently dealing with, send this onto a friend that is in this season to give them a boost!

What is a piece of advice that you could offer someone else for not going broke during the school year?

{More about Jessi Fearon}

Jessi Fearon is the founder of the popular personal finance blog, TheBudgetMama.com, where she shares her family’s real-life on a budget in order to inspire others to learn how to manage their money better. Jessi’s work has been featured on Buzzfeed, Rockstar Finance, TIME/Motto Magazine, Money Saving Mom, and The Penny Hoarder. Jessi resides in the foothills of the Blue Ridge Mountains of North Georgia with her husband Pat and their three children Conner, Collin, and Charlotte and a crazy Bluetick Coonhound named Blue.

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July 21, 2019 by Tricia Goyer Leave a Comment

25 Ways to Breathe Life Into Your Day

Do you go through your day drained and exhausted? As a mom of ten kids, I understand. There is always so much to do, it’s hard to slow down … let alone stop to catch a breath. But as moms we need that. We need refreshment. We need joy. We need to find ways to breathe life into our days.

Here are ways to do that:

Recharge

Recharging is taking our focus off of all the tasks and doing something that we enjoy. It’s filling up after being poured out. It’s engaging our bodies, our minds and our senses. Here are some ways to recharge:

1. Take a walk

2. Enjoy a cup of tea

3. Listen to your favorite soundtrack

4. Tend your garden

6. Take a nap

7. Listen to an inspiring podcast

8. Listen to a Psalm on the Bible App

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April 29, 2019 by Tricia Goyer Leave a Comment

How to Invite Others Into Your Healing through Transparency

Years ago, in 2005, I faced one of the hardest struggles of my life. I thought I was doing so well—as a writer, as a mom, and as a wife. One November, I pondered my family and my work, and I thought things couldn’t get any better. I even prayed Psalm 139:23-24:

Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. Point out anything in me that offends you, and lead me along the path of everlasting life.

God did some searching, and I didn’t like what He found! God showed me areas of my life that needed healing.

It started with an email from an old boyfriend, and my heartbeat jumped to my throat. I’d thought about Steven* from time to time but that moment all the 14-year-old emotions came rushing back. I felt like that young teen again who’d found her “first love.” And as I thought about him I became dissatisfied by my current life. (How horrible is that?!)

Even though I broke off all communication with Steven,* in the coming months I still struggled with my emotions. What I realized is that even though Jesus had given me a new life I was still wrapped up in the old graveclothes. My good friend, Joanna Weaver, gives us a good picture of those graveclothes in her book,

Lazarus Awakening: Finding Your Place in the Heart of God:

I can’t imagine what it must have been like to see Lazarus shuffle out of the darkness of the tomb, wrapped in thin strips of linen according to the custom of the day. His arms and legs were probably wrapped individually, which allowed some movement. But to say the man was restricted would be an understatement.

The stench of death surely lingered around him. Depending on the original sickness, bloody patches may have marked the burial garment here and there, interspersed with yellow-crusted infection. Though a welcome sight to those who loved him, the resurrected Lazarus might also have been a bit frightening to behold.

I wonder what Mary and Martha thought when Jesus said, “Loose him, and let him go” (John 11:44, nkjv). As happy as I’d be to see my brother alive, I wouldn’t want to touch the strips of linen that had clung to his rotting flesh. After all, who knew what lay beneath the bandages? Just how resurrected was he?

Unwinding graveclothes. It’s a dirty job. But someone has to do it. [Tweet that!]

Someone has to do it. And that’s one of the factors of Lazarus’ story that shocks me most. For while Jesus Christ did what only He could do—bring a dead man back to life—He invited those who stood around watching to help with the process.

“Loose him, and let him go.” It’s the same command Christ gives the church today.

Help In Healing

Don’t you love that? Jesus invited others to help Him with the process of healing! In a past post I shared hints for helping others who need healing It’s a great resource for helping others find the healing they need. But now, I want to speak to YOU. Do you have areas in your life where you need healing? Are you tired to the odor of death and stench that seem to cling to you? Do you wonder why the pain and the shame from the past still can cling to you, even though you’re a new creation in Christ? If so, keep reading. And be willing to ask others for help.

Joanna’s words are powerful to me because she was one of the friends who helped me remove my graveclothes. But in order for her to do that, I had to be transparent and show her my mess. I had to confess Steven’s* email and the emotions that I thought were long gone. It wasn’t possible for me to do this in my own strength. I needed help. Here are three ways I invited Joanna—and other friends—in:

3 Ways To Invite Others Into Your Healing

I asked for prayer. Are you struggling? Ask your friend(s) to pray. Find people who you can trust. Let them know your struggles, and count on their prayers to hold you up.
I asked for Scripture passages. After I asked for prayers, I also asked my friends for their favorite Scripture passages. I spend time reading them, meditating on them and praying them myself. My friends pointed me to verses I’d forgotten. And, as I read, God’s word healed me.
I listened to their advice. This was the hardest part, but I listened to the advice of my friends. They shared how they overcame their own struggles in their own lives. They spoke with love, but they didn’t sugarcoat the situation. Sometimes it was hard to be transparent with my struggles and to listen, but my godly friends steered me in the right direction. I’m so thankful for that.

What are you struggling with? Open up and let your friends know. Be transparent and invite others into your healing. And be willing to help those around you to remove their grave clothes and find healing. That’s the way God has designed things. We need each other in so many ways.

Today, spend time praying about the parts of your life that you need to be healed from.

I’m also excited to be an upcoming guest on Joanna Weaver’s new podcast, THE LIVING ROOM! This podcast will be such a blessing and to kick things off, she’s doing a Podcast Launch Giveaway!
(ENDS APRIL 30th @ midnight!)

To find out more and enter visit here:https://joannaweaverbooks.com/TLRgiveaway/

Find healing today. @TriciaGoyer shares 3 ways to invite others into your healing here:

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March 7, 2019 by Tricia Goyer Leave a Comment

3 Ways Children Teach Us To Pray – Kari Patterson

Do you want to pray more childlike? There is much we can learn from the prayers of a child. Kari Patterson shares 3 key characteristics to enrich our prayers

As I type these words, my daughter is snuggled up next to me with her head resting on my stomach. She’s been mostly quiet, but throughout the past few minutes she’s softly spoken a thought: “I loved seeing the ducks today.” A question: “When am I going to Madison’s house?” A praise: “I love you, Mommy. You’re the best mommy in the world.”

In just minutes she has shared her heart, sought clarity about the future, and expressed authentic praise—sounds like a pretty solid understanding of prayer to me. No wonder Jesus told us we must change to become childlike (Matt. 18:3). He wasn’t just being cute. He was giving us an important spiritual secret!

So . . . what is a childlike? Three key characteristics come to mind that would enrich our communion with God:

First, children are completely self-absorbed.

When my son bursts into my bedroom each morning, he’s already in midsentence, all his thoughts about dinosaurs and the ice age and Beethoven’s fifth symphony spilling out into space.

He doesn’t stop and think, “Wait, I can only talk to her about adult things, not these silly things on my mind.” Of course not. I want to hear what’s on his mind. Those things will probably change as he matures, but the only way to build a relationship is to begin where we are now.

The future-you cannot approach God. Only the you who you are today can.

To pray genuinely, to connect with the heart of our Father, we must simply begin with where we are now. The biggest obstacle to intimacy is waiting until we feel prayerful or spiritual or trying to get our thoughts neat and tidy before we begin. In Paul Miller’s life-giving and supremely practical book, A Praying Life, he explains, “If you don’t begin with where you are, then where you are will sneak in the back door. Your mind will wander to where you are weary.” [Paul Miller, A Praying Life: Connecting with God in a Distracting World (Colorado Springs: NavPress, 2009), 33.]

Isn’t this true? If your mind wanders to your son’s struggles in school, start there! If your mind drifts to financial anxieties, start there! There is really no sense in trying to pretend with God. He already knows all our thoughts, so any attempts to mask our fears or selfishness are silly and sort of offensive, if you think about it. Who are we to think we can fool Him? Jesus calls this hypocrisy. Instead, let’s come to Him like a child approaches her loving father.

Second, children express all their thoughts out loud.

Anyone with children is familiar with the common scenario of having a small (or not so small) child blurt out some embarrassing comment in public: “Why does that lady have such a big tummy?” “Mommy, my bottom itches!” As we mature, we learn to keep these thoughts to ourselves, but praying out loud definitely helps us cultivate a childlike attitude in prayer in several ways.

For one, praying aloud encourages us to express our innermost selves to God freely, which cultivates intimacy. While we’re wise to filter our words for people, the one place we’re encouraged to “pour out our hearts” is with God. It’s foolish to vent our feelings to others, but it’s godly to vent them to God. He’s the only one who is never tainted by our mixed bag of emotions. It’s not gossip when you’re talking to God!

We’re wise to go to the throne before we go to the phone.

Praying out loud also keeps our mind from wandering (as much). Let’s face it: We’re praying one minute and making a mental grocery list the next. We’re hopelessly distractible. It’s much easier to focus when audible words are coming out of our mouths. It also helps give perspective to what we’re praying. Some things seem one way in our minds, but when they’re spoken into the air, we can see them more clearly. This is especially true concerning confession.

It’s easy to think a confessional thought about something we’ve done; it’s quite another thing to say it out loud.

Children are frank about their faults.

That is, kids call spades, spades; they haven’t learned the deceptive art of dressing up difficult situations with sophisticated words. A critical component of childlike prayer is confession, and the English word confess is a translation of the Greek word homologeo, which literally means “to say the same.” That is, we agree to say the same about something that God says about it. In other words, I’ll call it what He calls it.

This is powerful in prayer! Often in our adult sophistication we become brilliant wordsmiths and create clever names for our sin. We love to rename it to make it sound better. For example: an affair. An affair is a special event I attend with my spouse. The correct word for having sex with someone else’s spouse is adultery.

God our Father has names for things. He is clear. When I say, “I’m just struggling with feeling like no one appreciates all the hard work I do. I really deserve some recognition,” that is called pride. When I say, “I’m just struggling because she has this big beautiful house while we’re just barely making ends meet,” that is called envy.

Why is this critical? Because until we name it, we can’t ditch it! We can’t repent of a “struggle.” We can only repent of sin. As long as we dress it up in flowery language, we’ll never be rid of it. God doesn’t command us to call sin, sin because He wants to rub our faces in it. He has no interest in humiliating us; He wants to free us.

He knows that as long as we call it something lovely, such as an “affair,” we won’t understand the seriousness of sin—that it takes us far, far away from Him. Remember, this isn’t a game. Sin isn’t cute.

I don’t want to cuddle up with what Christ died to free me from. Sin only leads to death. It only leads to destruction, bondage, grief. He wants me, His child, to be free.

We deal frankly, confess openly, speak honestly, refusing to go through religious motions or hide our true selves. We come just as we are, runny-nosed, self-absorbed children in need of the Father’s love and care. Let’s learn from those littles all around us and come to God with candor, as His kids.

Excerpted from Sacred Mundane: How to Find Freedom, Purpose, and Joy (Kregel Publications) ©2017.

3 Ways Children Teach Us How to Pray from @KariPatterson on @TriciaGoyer #parenting #prayer

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More about Sacred Mundane:

What if the key to changing your life—and yourself—is already in your hand?

What if breakthrough and extraordinary growth are waiting for you within the ordinary days you’re living right now?

In Sacred Mundane, Kari Patterson pulls open the dusty blinds to let the light of truth shine in. Even the most unremarkable life is an opportunity to see, know, love, and be utterly transformed by a God who knows no bounds and who upsets every expectation. He eagerly awaits your invitation to fill your world with mundane miracles and holy habits.

Through her entertaining narrative, candid real-life stories, Bible study, and practical instruction, Kari will take you by the hand to discover the beautiful sacredness in the life you already lead.

If you long to grow in God and make a real difference in your world—no matter how small—Sacred Mundane contains everything you need to glean the truth hidden within your everyday existence. Dive in, and learn how to find freedom, purpose, and joy.

Purchase a copy here:
Amazon | Barnes and Noble | CBD

Kari Patterson author of The Sacred Mundane

Kari Patterson shows readers the truth: in each unremarkable life lies an opportunity to see, know, love, and be utterly transformed by a God who meets everyone right where they are. Instead of stepping away from real life to find God, Patterson equips women with a six-step practice to move further in and meet Him in the humdrum moments of everyday existence.

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Just as we learn to come like a child to the Lord in prayer, we can also teach our children to pray in earnest to their heavenly father. I’m excited to share with you my Mommy & Me prayer journal!

It’s available HERE on Amazon. This journal is for little kids to write their prayers … or draw them! There is also a place for Moms to add their prayers, too. It makes a lovely keepsake! Here are the cover and sample pages:

Inside pages from new book *Mommy & Me Prayers: a Keepsake Journal*

My greatest joy would be for mothers and their children to spend time praying together. You can also grab Daddy & Me Prayers, and in the next few weeks I’ll be releasing, Grandma & Me Prayers, and Grandpa & Me Prayers, too. I’ll keep you posted!

May you and your children be blessed as you pray together!

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August 31, 2017 by Tricia Goyer Leave a Comment

Hope For Women … you’re capable of wonderful things

Here’s Hope For Women… you’re capable of wonderful things. My friend Angelia White shares with us today how you can (and why you should!) chase your dreams today. Let’s learn from her wisdom.

Hope For Women … You’re Capable of Wonderful Things

Life is not always easy—that’s a truth I’ve come to know far too well.

As a young girl and into adulthood, I haven’t always had ideal situations occur. I’ve faced instances of abandonment and sexual abuse, leading to brokenness, depression and having to start from scratch. I felt completely alone during my darkest points, and I wasn’t sure where to turn.

I never had sisters growing up, but I certainly wished for them. Thankfully, the Lord provided me with the most amazing women in my life who have shown me what it means to be strong and what it takes to be brave. They’ve proven how much they believe in me and reminded me that it’s even more important for me to believe in myself.

Because, in order to be truly successful, you must believe you’re capable of wonderful things.

” In order to be truly successful, you must believe you’re capable of wonderful things.” Read more from @angelialwhite on @TriciaGoyer

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In realizing this, I’ve come to love being able to share my story with other women and to inspire them to have hope for making dreams come true in their lives, as well. It’s for all women from all walks of life that I created Hope for Women magazine—because I know in my heart that we can all do the amazing feats God calls us to do.

Hope For Women … You’re Capable of Wonderful Things

Dreaming Big with Courage

Dreaming big definitely isn’t easy. In fact, it can be downright scary. You can either let that dream sit in your heart and never be released, or you can muster up all of the courage you have to pursue it passionately with all of your might until it finally becomes a reality. And let’s be honest—it’s going to take a lot of patience because those big and fabulous dreams certainly don’t just appear overnight. They take time, they take dedication, and they take a lot of you falling down and getting back up.

If you’re still holding on to your heart’s desires, don’t be afraid. You can achieve your dreams. How?

Believe In Yourself

When you wake up every morning, remind yourself that you are created to love and to serve the Lord. He won’t call you to do something you can’t do. Trust Him, and believe that you were chosen for a reason, and you can accomplish what you’ve set out to accomplish. You are enough in Him—don’t ever forget that.

Surround Yourself with the Right People

I wouldn’t be where I am today without the help and encouragement of some of the most amazing women I’ve ever known. Some of them I haven’t even met but have corresponded with and received support and inspiration from over the years. It’s essential to make sure you have uplifting women in your life who will remind you every day that what you’re doing is worth it. These are the ones who will offer you their hands when you stumble and fall and will provide shoulders and some tissue when you need to cry.

Act Now

You’re not going to find the “perfect” time for anything. Life always gets in the way of our plans. It doesn’t make sense to keep putting things off for “someday” in the future. If not now, then when? Go for your dreams now. Life is shorter than we often think, and we only have such a limited amount of time here on earth to live the lives we’ve imagined. Don’t hesitate—take a leap of faith, and start running toward those dreams now!

I know I don’t want to look back years from now and wonder why I didn’t do the things I was afraid to do. I want to cast those fears to the side and be brave. And, most importantly, I always want to have hope that great things are on the horizon.

Hope For Women … You’re Capable of Wonderful Things

Dear Woman, You can achieve your dreams. @angelialwhite @TriciaGoyer #DreamBig

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Angelia White decided to step out on faith with her dream of creating a lifestyle magazine for today’s inspiring woman. One thing is certain: she is illuminated by her passion for life, encouraging change and inspiring women to live, dream and inspire their ways to greatness!

Hope for Women Magazine | Twitter

August 24, 2017 by Tricia Goyer 1 Comment

4 Ways to be Overwhelmed by God, In the Midst of An Overwhelming World | Hayley DiMarco

For the woman overwhelmed, rest is a fantasy that we imagine would be amazing, but never a possibility. Before I began to seek God for my overwhelmed life, I didn’t even believe in rest. Maybe that’s because I didn’t seem to have enough time for it, but frankly I wouldn’t even have known what to do if I had.

It has happened before. There have been times when I have found myself with no deadlines, no pressing responsibilities, and a thought of wanting to take a little R and R. Then I remembered something else that needed to be done, so I abandoned the silly notion I could sit still for a while and do nothing “constructive” and got back to work.

Truthfully, sometimes I even resented people who rested, especially while I was working. I mean, shouldn’t they have been doing as much work as me?

“Do I have to do all the work around here?” I would complain as they played.

Yeah, I’ve always seemed to have too much to do and not enough time to do it. Welcome to my world—now let’s get to work! Seriously, though, it has always been hard for me to allow myself to rest—which isn’t helped by the fact I actually like to work. I like writing. I like teaching. I like cleaning. I like running errands. I even like doing laundry. It’s just when there is more to do than there is of me to do it, I get overwhelmed. That’s when I start to think, “Man, I could use a little rest.” But instead of resting, often I just determine to move a little faster, because if I hurry, maybe then I can get it all done.

Rest doesn’t come naturally to the busy woman, and I’m a busy woman. I’m going to bet that you are too. But you and I both know not resting isn’t healthy or faithful, so we have to remind ourselves rest isn’t giving up and it isn’t slacking. It’s taking the time to reprioritize and to ponder the deeper things of God.

When the world overwhelms us, our thoughts on God get shrouded in to-do-lists and activities, and the only way out of that constant state of overwhelmedness is to consider ourselves in the light of the Father. So here are four things to consider the next time you are feeling overwhelmed by the world and would rather be overwhelmed by God:

Consider your thoughts on God. What comes to mind when you think about God is the single most important source of your overwhelmedness. That’s because your thoughts on God will define your actions, emotions and reactions to the world around and within you. If you doubt God is constantly at work in your life, making you more like Christ and drawing you to Him, then the world will be more overwhelming than God. However, if you remind yourself daily He is constantly at work (even in the trials and tribulations of your life), then you can rest in the knowledge His complete power, constant presence, and all-knowing nature has you where He wants you. He has plans to prosper you and not to harm you—plans to give you hope and a future.
Accept God’s to-do-through-you list. Your to do list is long and exhausting, but His is short and wonderful. There is only one thing on God’s to-do-through-you-list and that is to love (see Matthew 22:36-37). When His list is placed over your life like an Instagram filter coloring everything you do or say, life has a way of not being so overwhelming.
Exam Your Day. God is constantly at work in your life, but sometimes you are too busy to notice. Each night, consider taking some time to review your day. Don’t look at what you have done or failed to do, but look at what God has been doing in you since you rose in the morning. The more you recognize the hand of God on your life, the more overwhelmed you will be by His constant and unfailing love for you.
Thank God. The woman overwhelmed spends most of her time in complaint mode, the mode where she rehearses all that she has to do and reminds herself of all she can’t. But God isn’t concerned with how much you do. He wants you to be more concerned with how much He has done. So each day, the woman overwhelmed by God takes the time to be thankful for the presence, power and wisdom of God in her life.

As we set our thoughts more firmly on the unfailing love and power of God, what used to overwhelm us pales in comparison. When you are overwhelmed with your lack of control, your sense of comparison or your discontentment with the way things are, set your mind on the way God is and know He works all things together for the good of those who love Him and have been called according to His purpose. What is that purpose you ask? It is to be overwhelmed by God. I pray today you will consider how overwhelming His love for you truly is and that you will find freedom from this overwhelming world.

See the 4 Ways to be Overwhelmed by God, In the Midst of An Overwhelming World from @hayleydimarco on @TriciaGoyer’s blog

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More about A Woman Overwhelmed: Finding God in the Messes of Life

“A Woman Overwhelmed” is a phrase with which many women can relate.

But what would happen if we could see the insanity in our pace and embrace our overwhelming God?

There is a reason they say that a woman’s work is never done— because it isn’t! As women, we often are overwhelmed by the demands and circumstances of life, resulting in stress, fear, worry, impatience, fatigue, frustration, and even depression. The truth is that we were created to be overwhelmed . . . not by life but by God! When we learn to be overwhelmed by God, the fruit in our lives goes from rotten to fragrant—filling our days with peace, hope, love, and joy.

In A Woman Overwhelmed, best-selling author Hayley DiMarco shares biblical insights and personal stories to offer a glimpse at the comedy of an overwhelmed life while encouraging us to discover the depths and heights of God’s love and power.

Be empowered to find freedom in becoming overwhelmed with who God is—by learning to focus on what we know about God so that we can hold onto faith even when it seems that all is lost. For it is when an overwhelmed woman gives up the mission of me and exchanges it for the mission of God that being overwhelmed becomes a good thing.

Choose to bask in the abundance of the Father instead of the abundance of life as his unfathomable depths can surely replace our fathomable messes.

Purchase a copy here:
Amazon | Barnes and Noble | CBD | HayleyDiMarco.com

Hayley DiMarco is the best-selling author of more than 40 books, including her latest release is A Woman Overwhelmed: Finding God in the Messes of Life (Abingdon Press) and its companion Bible study. As the founder of Hungry Planet, DiMarco speaks regularly for women’s groups and events. Hayley, her pastor husband, Michael, and their daughter live outside Nashville.

To learn more about DiMarco, visit her online home www.HayleyDiMarco.com. She can also be found on Facebook (hayley.dimarco) and Twitter (@hayleydimarco).

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August 17, 2017 by Tricia Goyer 5 Comments

The Great Cover Up | Chrystal Evans Hurst

Guest writer Chrystal Evans Hurst has some powerful words to share. We have become masters of illusion, spending time, energy, and resources to present a misrepresentation of our true self- we are part of the great cover-up.

Selfies. Most of us have taken them. Some of us have taken them seriously. If you’ve ever posted a selfie on social media, you can appreciate the work it takes to get a good one. The lighting has to be right. The angle has to be right. And of course, the filter has to be right, too.

Selfies are a serious business.

I’m embarrassed to say there have been times it took thirty snaps to get the one photo I felt was actually representative of what I wanted others to see. Cause what others see is important to us. Too important sometimes!

That is why we have become masters of illusion, spending time, energy, and resources to present a misrepresentation of our true self. We’ve become more concerned with protecting our image than we are with getting help for our problems. In fact, we can do such a good job of hiding our true self from others that, in the process, we do a good job of hiding it from ourselves. This leaves us with embarrassment, guilt, shame, or self-consciousness, and the more we hide, the more there is to keep hiding.

Why do we go through so much painstaking effort to cover up?

It’s simple, FEAR.

Fear of judgment from others and fear of harm to our reputation.

I know about this fear because I too have been a participant of the great cover up and, as a result, spent many years masked in the dark.

But, I also know that we have to make up our minds to live in the light. We have to find a safe place, and take off the mask.

I am asking you to join me in doing the unthinkable — Don’t persist in the cover-up. Reject the disguise, and be willing to be known.

I always love writers who challenge me to do the unthinkable — to better connect to the girl that I long to be in life. But I often pause and wonder, “Wait…Have you experienced the unthinkable? Did you take off the mask? How did that work for you?”

So since I am encouraging you to put down your mask, let me go first. Brace yourself girl, because this is me a bit unfiltered.

“I am a girl who has struggled with insecurity, battled with promiscuity, experienced pregnancy outside of marriage, fought regularly with the fat demon, and wrestled with a sense of shame and insignificance as a result of it all”

Whew… that felt liberating!

I can be honest with you about my faults and failures because I know that shame can be short-lived and give way for something much more valuable and enduring…FREEDOM.

Take off the mask—the one you’ve been hiding behind for a long time—and know when you do, it can hurt. The light burns, and the sensitivity to fresh air feels uncomfortable. Living in full acknowledgment of your tears leaves you open to the criticisms of others and the judgments of those who have no idea what it means to walk in your shoes.

But in the process, you open yourself up to freedom. Here are a few practical ways to start unmasking your true self.

The next time you are shrinking on the inside, but you feel compelled to wear a smile to convince everyone you’re okay…be vulnerable and tell someone you trust how you really feel.

When you’re lonely and are longing to be known, don’t cover it up with pictures on social media showing how satisfying your life is…be vulnerable and call a sister to come over and spend time with you.

Instead of covering up the fact that you aren’t good with God by being good at religion, join a small group where you can share your issues without judgment.

Don’t cover up the end of your streak of sobriety, seek professional or Christian counsel about your pattern of overindulging.

Don’t cover up that you’re struggling with purity, backing yourself into a corner of shame, self-condemnation, and guilt, which only keeps you sleeping around. Tell a trusted friend who has a spiritual compass to help navigate you back on track.

When you reject the great cover-up, you also reject a weight that’s kept you burdened and bound to a lie you don’t have to continue living with.

When you take off the mask, acknowledge your tears, and reject the cover-up, you will be able to breathe.

You will live in the light…and live free.

More about She’s Still There:

What’s a woman to do if her life is not taking shape the way that she thought that it would? What happens when she looks at herself in the mirror, lingering a little longer than usual, and realizes that she no longer recognizes the person staring back at her? What does she do when she sees that, somehow, her life has drifted away from all her original hopes, dreams, or plans?

I have been that woman. I wrote this book because I, too, know what it is to wander from the life that I was meant to live. But I’ve learned some things about how to find my way back — and I want to encourage you. Sometimes we simply need someone to hold our hand, cheer us on, and believe we are still capable of being who we intended to be.

In She’s Still There, I authentically share, from one girlfriend to another, the importance of the personal process and the beauty of that path. It’s a book of “me toos,” reminders of the hoped for, and challenges for the path ahead—to find direction, purpose, and true satisfaction.

Chrystal Evans Hurst co-authored the bestselling Kingdom Woman with her father, author, and pastor Tony Evans. She reaches a wide audience of women speaking at conferences, sharing on her blog, “Chrystal’s Chronicles,” writing for Proverbs 31 Ministries, and teaching and leading women in her home church. Chrystal also cultivates hearts and commands chaos as the chief operating officer of the Hurst household. She and her husband Jessie adore their three very hungry boys, two adult girls, one son-in-love and their one gorgeous granddaughter.

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women

6 Ways to Find Joy in Your Day {Printable!}

But how do you find joy in your day?

Here are 6 ways … and a Scripture verse for each!

1. Thank God for each new morning.

2. Turn on worship music.

5. Join the kids in praising God.

6. Thank God for troubles.

How about you? What do you do to find joy in your day? What’s your favorite Scripture about joy?

Prayer

More Resources

How did that happen?

The list of little foxes is extensive

We’ve all been there

How to keep passion alive

Lovestruck

About Lovestruck: Discovering God’s Design for Romance, Marriage, and Sexual Intimacy

Blossoming Mom and Baby is all about supporting moms through the journey of motherhood.

Listen in here:

Pops of color and the no’s of God

White Space

When God Says No

Enter here to win a copy of A Redesigned Life!

Chapter 3 Living Out Your Pop of Color for God [i] Donna Tersiisky, “The ABCs of Visual Design: Emphasis,” accessed June 23, 2018▲, http://www.tersiiska.com/design/principles/.

Budgeting for Back-to-School Expenses

How to Find Extra Cash for Back-to-School Expenses

1. Cell Phones

2. Insurance

3. Subscription Services

4. Be Inconvenienced

What to Do with Your Savings

{More about Jessi Fearon}

25 Ways to Breathe Life Into Your Day

God did some searching, and I didn’t like what He found! God showed me areas of my life that needed healing.

Unwinding graveclothes. It’s a dirty job. But someone has to do it. [Tweet that!]

Help In Healing

3 Ways To Invite Others Into Your Healing

Excerpted from Sacred Mundane: How to Find Freedom, Purpose, and Joy (Kregel Publications) ©2017.

Hope For Women … You’re Capable of Wonderful Things

Hope For Women … You’re Capable of Wonderful Things

Dreaming Big with Courage

Believe In Yourself

Surround Yourself with the Right People

Act Now

Hope For Women … You’re Capable of Wonderful Things

<img data-lazy-fallback="1" decoding="async" loading="lazy" class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-17590" src="https://triciagoyer.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/08/A-Woman-Overwhelmed-sm-194x300.jpg" alt="" width="194" height="300" />More about A Woman Overwhelmed: Finding God in the Messes of Life

More about She’s Still There:

More about A Woman Overwhelmed: Finding God in the Messes of Life