Laundry is certainly a daily challenge when you have four children, but one particular load stands out in my mom memory.
I’d just gotten back from a weeklong summer course hours away over mountain roads to fulfill requirements for my teaching credential and was picking up the Hansel and Gretel trail of clothes on my kids’ bedroom floors when I discovered the problem. In my son’s jeans’ pocket was a small, plastic container – the type you put matches in when you camp. Except that this container didn’t hold matches; it had a single cigarette.
Ugh, he’s experimenting. I’ll talk with him tonight when he gets home work on the ranch.
My rancher husband Craig works 15-hour days during the summer, so I knew I would see our son Justin first.
He and his older sister Rebekah burst through the front door about an hour later as I was sitting on the living room floor sorting socks. Justin is six feet three with a die-for shade of red hair, a friendly sprinkle of freckles, and quick wit. Rebekah is an athletic five feet seven with long, dark brown hair and electric blue eyes that light up a room when she enters.
They were teasing each other and laughing when I said, “Take a seat” and held up the plastic container and cigarette.
“It’s okay, Mom,” Rebekah said. “He’s quit.”
Quit? “Quit” meant he’d been smoking for some time. “Quit” meant he’d been addicted. “Quit” meant I’d really been clueless for quite a while.
We had a long talk while we all folded laundry together there on the living room floor. It was sort of a coming of age moment for me as the parent of the first two of our four kids…a time when I realized the best strategy for me as a parent was prayer.
A short time later I began prayerwalking, taking my worries and to-do lists and mom wishes to the Lord on a daily basis as I walked up and down the streets in my little town in the Sierra Valley. Many tears have been shed on those avenues – certainly for my own children but also for others. Shortly after I began prayerwalking, I realized my own concerns often paled as I walked by others’ homes and businesses and thought about the needs behind those doors.
Twelve years later I am still walking and praying for my family and for others in my community. Today I will take our fourth child off to college for the first time – to UC Berkeley. Her sister and two brothers have already finished their college education and are serving God in the communities where He has planted them.
And I still keep that little plastic container to remind me that prayer is the best strategy as I parent…because I’m seeking the Problem Solver, who knows what is best for my children.
Janet Holm McHenry is a national speaker and the author of 19 books, including Prayer Changes Teens: How to Parent From Your Knees and PrayerWalk: Becoming a Woman of Prayer, Strength, and Discipline. For more about Janet, see her website at www.janetmchenry.com or her blog Up2Me, http://janetmchenry.wordpress.com.
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