Grab the Moment! (read part 1 here!)
Don’t limit your service to home. Take your caring attitude wherever you go. Hold the door open for strangers, offer your seat on a crowded bus or help the church nursery teacher clean her room. Whenever possible, encourage your children to do these things as well. Point out how nice it feels to help someone. Later in the day, remind your child how kind it was of him to hold that door or give up that seat. You can even talk about the experience with others, Dad, Grandma, Aunt Cathy, to further reinforce your child’s kindness.
To help turn these experiences into true character development, you’ll need to spend some time talking about what your child is discovering through his acts of cheerful service. In 7 Things Kids Never Forget (Multnomah), Ron Rose says, “Work with your children on a service project, any kind that helps other people. Take pictures during the project. Then use the pictures to review the time. Ask what questions such as, What was happening here?’ and What were the people feeling?’ The goal is to focus on a shared experience of caring for other people.”
While your child might find plenty of opportunities for showing kindness to people in your community, even the most caring child can struggle to be kind at home. Help your child understand that serving others includes family. Find projects you can do together to help other family members. Have her help you pull weeds in the garden, take out the trash or bake cookies for a special treat. Talk about how special it is to be part of a family and how working together and helping each other make a family stronger. Reward your child with hugs and praise for a job well done.
The Impact of Encouragement
When your kids do show evidence of kindness in their actions toward others, you can reinforce these characteristics through encouragement. In his book Hugs for Mom (Howard Publishing), John William Smith illustrates the importance of encouragement. He says, “Watch your children’s backs straighten, their eyes brighten, their work improve, their lives change and their love deepen all because you have imparted courage to them by your words.”
Let your children know their efforts also please God. Look up Colossians 3:23 and read it with them: “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men.” Explain that when we do something kind for others, it makes God glad and shows him how much we love him.
Remember, kind and loving behavior does not come naturally. Be patient with your children as they learn to see the needs of others. Help them learn to serve with a cheerful heart through your own loving attitude. Whether you’re ironing shirts or making peanut butter sandwiches, let your children see that your actions are based on love. And before long, you’ll see them putting their love into action, too.
Amen! All parents should teach their kids this. This world is so angry and so questioning. You can’t take a step outside your front door without encountering an angry person. It just seems so discouraging to see how kindness is a rare species.