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You are here: Home / faith / Revolutionary Parenting | A Q&A with Tricia Goyer and Phil Hodges

March 22, 2013 by Tricia Goyer Leave a Comment

Revolutionary Parenting | A Q&A with Tricia Goyer and Phil Hodges

Over the next few weeks leading up to the release of Lead Your Family Like Jesus, Phil Hodges, one of my co-authors, and I are going to be answering questions that my amazing launch team queried us with. I hope you can learn from some of our answers. Parenting is a constant learning process, and I hope you’ll be encouraged in what you read.

Oh, and on April 16, join me and my friend Tracey Eyster for a LIVE webcast! We’ll be talking about being moms and leading like Jesus! RSVP by setting a reminder.

 

What has been the most revolutionary concept, experience, or lesson you’ve learned through parenting? And what changed because of it?  

 

Phil: What it feels like to love unconditionally and to be loved in the same way.

 

Tricia: I understand God’s love for me more, as I love my children. Wow!

 

How do you encourage families that do not have a dad present or a father who is not as spiritual mature or does not lead?  
 
Phil: God will honor the prayers and witness of those who seek to walk closer to Him. One thing we can cling to with all confidence is that we have a Father in heaven who loves us beyond anything we can imagine, who will never leave us or forsake us, who desires to hear and answer our prayers in the best way possible. Love those around you as Jesus would and let the Holy Spirit work on their hearts.

 

Tricia: God is the Father to the fatherless. I grew up in a home like this, but God has drawn me to Him and transformed my life. Yes, I long for what I didn’t have, but I’m thankful for God even more!

 

Sometimes it feels like everyone has it all together . . . except me. How do you encourage people to lead their families in these moments of doubt?

 

Phil: Comparative parenting is a high-risk way of assessing your parenting and family life. It is easy to fall into pride and fear-driven complacency or anxiety based on false information. The fact is you and your family are unique and special in God’s eyes. When you start putting yourself down based on what you think is going on in other families, you will always be acting on inaccurate information. You will never know what internal price being paid by others for any external success you might see or know if it is worth it. A safe standard to use is one that love provides: Am I loving the best I can in the choices I make and helping my children learn to do the same?


Tricia: When we compare our weaknesses to others’ strengths, we feel defeated and worthless. Yet when we compare our strengths to others’ weaknesses, then pride slips in. The best thing is don’t compare! I’ve come to a place where I’m able to appreciate the ways other families excel without having to feel bad about myself or my family.

As I talk about in Lead Your Family Like Jesus, when our family discovered what we were “about”—what our label was—then we focused on excelling in those things, and not trying to keep up with those around us. For example, one of the things we’re about is family meals. I might serve canned vegetables and grilled cheese one night, but it’s the experience. No one’s life is like a Pinterest board. We all have “sharable” moments, but we’re all a work in progress.

*Photo credit: Image courtesy of Vlado / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Filed Under: faith, family, Tots to Teens


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