Tricia Goyer HomepageTricia Goyer

Living God’s Word One Step at a Time

You are here: Home / Archives for balanced

balanced

by 2 Comments

How to Breathe God-Messages and Find Inspiration

 

How to Breathe God-Messages and Find Inspiration

How to Breathe God-Messages

Where do you go for inspiration? Sometimes I sit down with my journal. Other times I take a walk or take a bath. Today I found inspiration from Facebook and hymns. Honestly!

Facebook is always interesting, but when I read through my feed today I noticed a few things:

Death, loss, and moms struggling with anxiety. I saw needs . . . lots of needs. I saw friends and acquaintances who need a fresh dose of encouragement and hope.

Inspiration means “breath of God.” Sometimes when inspiration hits I’m able to do fun work. I’m able to write a moving chapter in my novel or pen a short story for a magazine. But sometimes God’s breath takes me to harder places where I feel others’ hurt deep in my chest.

Inspiration isn’t always light and fluffy. (Don’t we wish it was!) And sometimes creativity comes so that we can offer just the right words, messages, or images to hurting friends.

Here are 5 ways to breathe God-messages:

  1. Start with God’s Word. God’s Word is truth and is where all creativity comes from. Read meaningful passages and delve into the creativity of God’s Word. I love the poetry of Psalms. The word images always inspire me!
  2. Pray for God’s inspiration. “The Sovereign LORD has given me a well-instructed tongue, to know the word that sustains the weary. He wakens me morning by morning, wakens my ear to listen like one being instructed,” Isaiah 50:4 (NIV). Pray that God will give you a well-instructed tongue to inspire and bless someone else.
  3. Fill yourself up first. Before I even opened Facebook I spent time with God. I read numerous chapters from the book of John. I marveled at the compassion Jesus had for those who dared to trust Him. My heart grew thankful over His compassion for me, and soon my full heart was ready to spill out.
  4. Pray for words, messages, or images that can be a gift to others. “A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in a setting of silver,” we read in Proverbs 25:11. Those “words” can be shared in numerous ways!
  5. Find creative ways to share God’s truth. This morning my heart was drawn to creating a visual message for so hurting friends. This is what I came up with:

childofGod

I don’t know who is going to see this graphic. I don’t know how these words will speak to hurting hearts. All I know is that God inspired me this morning, and creativity flowed. From the stirring that I feel deep within, I imagine it’ll keep flowing. That’s how creativity works, isn’t it? Once you prime the pump, it’s amazing what comes out!

What about you? How do you get inspired? How many God-messages has He given you lately to share?

Steps You can Take

  1. Spend time with God, praying for God’s inspiration.
  2. Do something to feed your creative soul.
  3. Let the creativity spill out through words, through music, through art.
  4. Share your message (God’s message through you) with others.

Daily Prayer

Dear Lord,

Thank you for the creativity and inspiration you give us. I pray that you would continue to inspire me daily so that I can breathe your messages to those around me in need. 

In Jesus name, amen.

Resources You Might Like:

The Creative Life
A Million Little Ways

 

by Leave a Comment

How to Budget for Back-to-School Expenses

 

How to Budget for Back-to-School Expenses

Budgeting for Back-to-School Expenses

I hate to say it, but back-to-school expenses are coming. Summer has been flying by and, depending on where you are, the school year is quickly creeping up on us. Here in Georgia, school started the first week of August!

I know for me, last year was hard. Maybe that was because it was the first school year for our family of five–I wasn’t exactly sure how to budget for it. Or maybe it was because there really are so many various and unexpected school-related expenses that happen during the year.

That’s why I believe it’s important to make sure you have at least $100 of wiggle room in your budget each month for the school year and especially back-to-school expenses. I know that sounds like a lot of money (and it definitely is.) However, chances are, when you look back over last year’s budget, you’ll notice that you come very close if not over the $100 a month for all those last-minute purchases.

How to Find Extra Cash for Back-to-School Expenses

Here are just a few ways that can hopefully help you figure out how to find an extra $100 (or more!) in your monthly budget for back-to-school expenses:

1. Cell Phones

Regardless if it’s just you and your spouse or the whole family on your phone plan, paying for cell service can be a little crazy. That’s why if you haven’t already, I highly suggest you switch over to a company like Republic Wireless (who I personally use) or Ting (several of my friends use them and love them).

You still get to have an awesome smartphone but without the high cell phone bill (mine is only $25/mo with data!).

2. Insurance

Yeah, I know, you don’t want to talk about this subject because it’s one of those “necessary evils.” However, if you haven’t called around lately to gather new quotes for your different insurance needs, I highly suggest you do. You could save yourself hundreds of dollars a year just from a simple phone call.

3. Subscription Services

It’s happened to me before. I completely forget that I have a subscription service deducting money from my bank account. It’s like I put it on autopilot and fail to evaluate if it’s a necessary expense or not.

The next thing to do is check for any recurring subscriptions, maybe now is the time to evaluate if they are still necessary. Spend a little time going through and canceling the unnecessary ones. This should add a little more wiggle room to your budget for those back-to-school expenses.

4. Be Inconvenienced

I’m a firm believer in the fact that sometimes, we are just paying way too much for convenience. It’s possible that if we allow ourselves to be inconvenienced, we could save $1,000’s of dollars a year!

One of my favorite ways to be inconvenienced is by not using paper towels. A few years ago, we switched from using paper towels regularly to using bar mop cloths. That one small change has resulted in saving us hundreds over the years! We only have to buy one roll of paper towels twice a year (for draining meats like bacon or ground beef.) Honestly, it has affected us very little.

So, look around your home and find little ways that you could save money by simply being “inconvenienced.” You could end up adding a whole lot more to your school budget than just a $100 a month!

What to Do with Your Savings

Those are just a few ways that you can cut your expenses before the start of the school year. But the key to not going broke this school year is to remember that once you add that wiggle room to your budget, as a result, you must make sure that you add a line item accounting for that.

For instance, let’s say you cut your cell phone bill from $100 to $30 a month (yes, that’s totally possible with Republic Wireless or Ting.) Now you have $70 of wiggle room in your budget that must be accounted for.

Now you’d want to add a line item like “School Miscellaneous” or something with $70 as the total.

Example:

  • Mortgage: $1,000
  • Utilities: $200
  • Car Payment: $400
  • Insurance: $150
  • Cell Phone: $30
  • Groceries: $500
  • School Miscellaneous: $70

Then whenever those random, “Hey we need each child to bring in a snack for our upcoming event on Thursday” happens, you’ll have the money ready to go in your budget. Just make sure that you account for that expense and deduct the total from your category for back-to-school expenses.

Hopefully, this helps you if you’re getting geared up for the back-to-school season. Even if this isn’t a stage of life you’re currently dealing with, send this onto a friend that is in this season to give them a boost!

What is a piece of advice that you could offer someone else for not going broke during the school year?

{More about Jessi Fearon}

10714251_730966356979424_3359439497490871642_oJessi Fearon is the founder of the popular personal finance blog, Real Life on a Budget, where she shares her family’s real-life on a budget in order to inspire others to learn how to manage their money better. Jessi’s work has been featured on Buzzfeed, Rockstar Finance, TIME/Motto Magazine, Money Saving Mom, and The Penny Hoarder. Jessi resides in the foothills of the Blue Ridge Mountains of North Georgia with her husband Pat and their three children Conner, Collin, and Charlotte and a rescue dog named Belle.

 

 

Additional Resources

How to Avoid Going Broke This School Year
Saving Money with Groupon Coupons
7 Tips for Living on $7 a Day
Restoring the Art of the Piggy Bank Savings
30 Cheap & Fun Date Night Ideas

by Leave a Comment

Simple Organization Tips for Working From Home

Over the years I’ve put a lot of thought, sacrifice, and even money into figuring how to make working from home run smoothly. Just yesterday I was telling a friend, “How amazing is it that I get to do what I love [write] while also getting to spend a large portion of my day with my children?” Here are some details of how I practically manage with Simple Organization Tips for Working From Home.

Tricia Goyer shares Organizational Tips for Working From Home

Simple Organization Tips for Working From Home

I love working from home. I love being here for my kids.

I’m here when my kids wake up in the morning. I’m the first person they see when they come downstairs. I take them for walks. We homeschool and play board games. I fold their jeans and T-shirts from the dryer and set dinner before them every night. I tuck them in bed.

This doesn’t come without challenges. though. My kids at home now are ages 9, 10, 12, 15, 17, and 17. That’s a lot! A lot of noise and a lot of mess. It’s sometimes hard to concentrate. One of my organization tips for working from home has been, I’ve resorted to hiring outside help. Specifically,

  • I hire a housekeeper to come once a week.

  • I hire a “Manny” (My older son) to come many times a week, during the day to keep an eye on everyone while I work.

  • I use assistants to be my extra hands and feet. They upload my blogs, manage my website, book guests for my radio show, etc.

None of this has happened overnight. I’ve sought out help in small ways, and I’ve built up over time. I’ve taken each step once my income has been able to sustain it. And the truth is knowing that I have others counting on me paying them has helped me be diligent about my work, too. I can’t play around on Facebook or computer games all day. I need money coming in to support those who make it possible for me to do what I do.

Simple Organization Tips for Working From Home

Another organization tip for working from home is, I depend on my handy-dandy calendars!

Digitally I use Google Calendar and Calendly to keep track of where I need to be when. I don’t schedule anything unless I consult with my calendars first. I set up blocks when I know help will be there. or when my wonderful husband will be available for the kids, and then I schedule my work into those slots.

Things don’t always go as planned, but at least I have a plan that propels me in the right direction!

Simple Organization Tips for Working From Home

But, it’s not just having a calendar that makes the difference.  My 3rd organizational tip for working from home is to plan to fill your calendar wisely.

Here are a few important things about my calendar:

  • Not every slot is full. There is time to homeschool, to cook, to clean, to play outside. There is also white space to nap, read, or paint.
  • I schedule in time with friends- mostly virtually these days.
  • I focus on a few important things. My life revolves around my kids, my writing, friends/church, and mentoring teen moms. That’s enough. I say no to a lot of things so I can say yes to the things that God has called me to. Those things are most important to me.

I also like to use a physical planner, as well, to help keep me on track of where I should be. I am currently using my friend Ruth Chou Simon’s Planner. It’s beautiful and functional:

Gracelaced is the planner that Tricia Goyer uses

There is one more key part to managing my schedule…

Whenever I start feeling anxious or worried, I go back to this verse.

Tricia Goyer shares this very in her post Organizational Tips for Working From Home

 

Ecclesiastes 4:6, “Better one handful with tranquillity than two handfuls with toil and chasing after the wind.”

Yes, there are many additional ways I can give and serve, but one handful is enough, thank you very much.

How about you? Do you have a calendar that helps you keep track of your life and goals? Do you have any organization tips for working from home to add? I’d love to hear about it! 

You might also enjoy Balancing Working From Home with Schooling From Home. Download the free printable for more work from home tips.

Balancing Work From Home with Schooling from Home

by Leave a Comment

How to Enjoy Motherhood Without the Mom Guilt

Enjoy Motherhood Without the Mom Guilt

How to Enjoy Motherhood Without the Mom Guilt

Recently I had the opportunity to chat with Jennifer Blossom of Blossoming Mom & Baby about how to enjoy motherhood without the mom guilt. It was a great conversation full of help and hope for moms in the trenches.

Blossoming Mom and Baby is all about supporting moms through the journey of motherhood.

Their belief is that you were created to THRIVE in your motherhood journey and not just going through the motions or mundane. No more complaining your way through motherhood. And no more fueling your body and mind with things that have zero (or negative) value. They believe it’s time to get on the right path for your life and motherhood. AND it’s never (EVER!) too late to start. They’re there right now with a fresh cup of coffee and a welcoming hand to invite you into the most supportive motherhood community in the world.

Jennifer and her team want you to remember, the way you show up and care for yourself MATTERS. When you learn how to take care of yourself mentally, physically, spiritually, emotionally, and within your home~ your life (and the life of those around you) will forever change.

Listen in here:

https://www.blossomingmommyandbaby.com/podcast/2019/8/12/416-motherhood-without-the-mom-guilt-with-tricia-goyer

Are you new here? Follow me on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Google+, or Instagram. And make sure you are subscribed to my newsletter.

Disclosure of Material Connection: Some of the links in the post above are “affiliate links.” This means if you click on the link and purchase the item, I will receive an affiliate commission. Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will add value to my readers. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.” Read full privacy policy here.

by Leave a Comment

25 Ways to Breathe Life Into Your Day

25 Ways to Breathe Life in your day

25 Ways to Breathe Life Into Your Day

Do you go through your day drained and exhausted? As a mom of ten kids, I understand. There is always so much to do, it’s hard to slow down … let alone stop to catch a breath. But as moms we need that. We need refreshment. We need joy. We need to find ways to breathe life into our days.

Here are ways to do that:

Recharge 

Recharging is taking our focus off of all the tasks and doing something that we enjoy. It’s filling up after being poured out. It’s engaging our bodies, our minds and our senses. Here are some ways to recharge:

1. Take a walk

2. Enjoy a cup of tea

3. Listen to your favorite soundtrack

4. Tend your garden

6. Take a nap

7. Listen to an inspiring podcast

8. Listen to a Psalm on the Bible App

Want to read more? Follow me over to The Better Mom to read 25 Ways to Breathe Life Into Your Day~

Are you new here? You might want to subscribe to my email updates, or follow me on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Google+, or Instagram.

by 5 Comments

7 Prayers to Say for Your Children

These 7 prayers to say for your children can help be a springboard for your prayer life. Do you need new words to guide your heart as you seek God for your family? Let these prayers guide you.

So many times I find myself praying for the same things for my children. Can you relate? Here are 7 prayers to pray for your children to help be a springboard for your prayer life. 

7 Prayers to Say for Your Children

I often pray for my children…

That they are healthy.

That they are safe.

Oh, that they are obedient.

The other day I was reading the Bible, and I came upon Philippians 1:9-11:

I pray that your love will overflow more and more,
and that you will keep on growing in knowledge and understanding.
For I want you to understand what really matters,
so that you may live pure and blameless lives until the day of Christ’s return.
May you always be filled with the fruit of your salvation—
the righteous character produced in your life by Jesus Christ—
for this will bring much glory and praise to God. (NLT)

As I read it I thought: This is a perfect Scripture to pray for my kids. And they are perfect prayers to say for your children.

I’ve broken this prayer into seven days, and I found other Scriptures to pray too. Won’t you join me?

Sunday: Pray for love that overflows

Lord, may the love of _______ increase and overflow for those in our family and for everyone else. (1 Thessalonians 3:12)

Monday: Pray for growth in knowledge

Lord, may _______ grow to love your Word. May the heart of _______ trust your commands. May _______ seek good judgment. Fill _______ with the knowledge of your will through all the wisdom and understanding that the Spirit gives. (Psalm 119:66, Colossians 1:9)

Tuesday: Pray for understanding of what really matters

Lord, may _______ know your will and understand what is right because of your law. May _______ not copy the behavior and customs of this world, but be transformed into a new person through changed thoughts and through knowing your perfect and pleasing will. (Romans 2:18, Romans 12:2)

Wednesday: Pray for a pure and blameless life

Lord, may _______ keep firm in faith, staying pure and blameless, until the end. May the good work you started in _______ carry on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus. May _______ hold firmly to the word of life, so life’s labor will not be in vain. (1 Corinthians 1:8, Philippians 1:6, Philippians 2:6)

Thursday: Pray for the fruit of salvation

Lord, may _______ be like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither. May _______ delight in the law of the Lord, meditating on it day and night. And because of your word planted deep, may whatever _______ do prosper. (Psalm 1:2-3)

Friday: Pray for righteous character and for a life in Jesus

Lord, may _____ be a peacemaker who sows in peace and reaps a harvest of righteousness. Lord, may your name be honored because of the life of _______. I know this is only possible because of your grace. May love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control flow out of the life of _______ because of your spirit within. (James 3:18 2 Thessalonians 1:12, Galatians 5:22-23)

Saturday: Pray for glory and praise to God

Lord, may _______ produce much fruit so that you may be glorified. May the life of _______ be for your praise and glory, because of hope put in you. (John 15:8, Ephesians 1:14)

7 Prayers to Say for Your Children

As parents, it’s important to pray for our kids, and I’m so thankful that God has given us His Word as a foundation to do just that! He has given you prayers to say for your children!

TriciaGoyer breaks down Philippians 1 into 7 prayers to say for your kids!

Click To Tweet

prayingforyourchildren-618×800

Enjoy this free printable 7 Prayers to Say for Your Children:

prayingforyourchildren

I hope these prayers to say for your children are as helpful to you as they have been for me!  Do you have any that you would like to add?  Let me know!

~Tricia

More Resources from Tricia Goyer:

7 Prayers to Say for Your Children

Prayers the Changed History (pre-order today!)

7 Prayers to Say for Your Children

Praying for Your Future Husband (for teens girls)

7 Prayers to Say for Your Children

Whit’s End Mealtime Devotions (for families)

Balanced (for busy moms)

by 1 Comment

End of Summer (or anytime) Cookie Recipe

During the summer my kids are like little mice–always in the kitchen scurrying around to find a snack. They especially love a sweet summer treat. Of course, chocolate chip cookies are a favorite for us so I thought I’d share a cookie recipe guest post from Lathe Weymouth. Now that we are ending summer, your little mice will still love this as a school snack.  Or really, who doesn’t love these ANYTIME!?

Be sure to give it a try and let me know what you think!

Tricia Goyer shares a great end of summer cookie recipe

Everyone’s Favorite Chocolate Chip Cookie Recipe

In my family, there is one recipe book to end all recipe books. It is the last word on cookery. This wonderful book contains numerous recipes requiring bathtub-size mixing bowls and is the only place where I’ve ever found the instructions necessary to make both Butter Soup (what???), Head Cheese, and Pickled Pigs Feet.

cookie recipe

 

The cookbook is called The Mennonite Treasury of Recipes (A Canadian Best-Seller), and today I’m here to share with you my family’s favorite treat as featured in the Treasury. Don’t worry, it’s not Head Cheese. It’s a recipe for Oatmeal Chocolate Chip Cookies which I’ve made countless times. They’re by far my husband’s favorite baked good, and I’ve never met anyone who didn’t like these cookies. I generally make them in batches of 5 dozen, and they’re gone within one or two days. Without further ado, here is the recipe for Everyone’s Favorite Chocolate Chip Cookies. As you can see, it’s what we call a “scratch and sniff” cookie recipe around here.

Everyones Favorite Chocolate Chip Cookie Recipe Tricia Goyer

Print The Recipe

Everyone’s Favorite Chocolate Chip Cookie Recipe

Author: Mrs. Eleanor Neustaedter
From “The Mennonite Treasury of Recipes”
Ingredients
  • 1 cup shortening (I use butter)
  • ⅔ cup white sugar
  • ⅔ cup brown sugar
  • 2 eggs
  • 1 tsp vanilla extract
  • 1 ½ cups flour
  • 1 tsp salt
  • 1 tsp baking soda
  • 1 package chocolate chips
  • ½ cup chopped nuts or shredded coconut if desired
  • 2 cups oatmeal
Instructions
  1. Cream shortening/butter.
  2. Add sugars gradually.
  3. Add eggs and vanilla and beat well.
  4. Sift flour, salt and soda and add to creamed mixture.
  5. Add nuts, chocolate chips and oatmeal last.
  6. Drop by spoonfuls onto greased cookie sheets and bake in a 350-degree oven for 12 minutes.
This cookie recipe, as printed in the Mennonite Treasury, makes about 2.5 dozen cookies. If you want to make 5 like I do, you’ll have to double the recipe. To add a copy of the Mennonite Treasury to your cookbook library, you can purchase a copy here. It’s somewhat pricy, as it’s hard to find but well worth the money if you ask me. All the recipes are tried and true, submitted by Mennonite homemakers. Credit for this chocolate chip cookie recipe goes to Mrs. Eleanor Neustaedter in Steinbach, Manitoba.
Want to save the recipe in your Pinterest? You can find it here on my Pinterest board for Delish Desserts! 

~Tricia

You might also like:

Made With Love Tricia Goyer

 

by Leave a Comment

Praying God’s Word For Yourself and Your Child

Praying God’s Word

praying for your child

Through the years I’ve seen how important it is to pray God’s word over and for my children. I’ve also watched how God moved in my kid’s hearts and lives when I shared the scriptures with them. That’s why I’ve made it a priority to read through the Bible each year and journal what God speaks to my heart through His word.

“I will both lie down and sleep in peace, for you alone, Lord, make me live in safety.” Psalm 4:8

Lord, I am so thankful that you always watch over my child, even when she lies down in sleep. May my child always sleep peacefully with knowledge of your care.

Is it your goal to read through the Bible in 2019? More than that, do you want to apply God’s will to your life and the life of your child? I’ve created some resources for that!

Daily Bread

First, my book Praying Through The Bible in One Year allows you to do both!

Praying Through the Bible in One Year is a Scripture Reading Plan and Guided Journal to help you read and apply God’s Word to your life.

My desire is for this journal to guide you as you seek God and His truth. It’s divided into three parts.

Praying Through the Bible in One Year interior pages.

1. A Scripture Reading Plan. This plan takes you from Genesis to Revelation. Reading four or five chapters a day, you’ll read through the whole Bible in one year! Each week has five days of reading, leaving the weekends for catch-up.

2. A Daily Scripture. Pause on these verses, read them closely, and consider how they can impact your prayers for your kids.

3. A Prayer Prompt. Through these prompts, you’ll focus on ways you can pray for your kids. Blank space is provided for you to continue the prayer or to write down other meaningful Scriptures that you read during the day’s reading.

Leave a Legacy

Second, I created a free course to help you master the skill of journaling through the Bible to create a Legacy Bible for your own children.

Join me as I guide you in sharing God’s Word with your children or grandchildren through the pages of your own journaling Bible. Through this free, 6-week course you’ll discover how to share your own personal reflections through the pages of God’s Word.

It’s such a meaningful way to pass on heartfelt prayers alongside your favorite Scripture passages, leaving a heritage of faith. Each journal entry will be a treasured gift to future generations.

Find Community

There’s no doubt about it, we need each other. God created us for community. That’s why I started a group for us to connect and share how He is moving in our lives through His word. Every morning we post the daily verses  (except weekends!) and talk about how the Spirit spoke to us regarding that passage.

Join the Facebook group–and join me–in praying for your child through the year:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/walkitoutscripturejourney/

praying god's word

Worth The Effort

Finally, I want to encourage you not to give up. The journal isn’t dated because I know how much pressure that can bring. Life happens. If you get off track one week, just pick up again the next week. God is more concerned with your desire to read His Word and connect with His heart than He is with your ability to complete a weekly task. This is your journal concerning your prayers for your kids. If it takes you two years to read through the Bible, that will be wonderful! Know your efforts, whether over one year or two or more, will be worth it.

Pick up a copy for yourself and share with friends! May God’s Word transform each of us this year!

Order Praying Through The Bible in a Year here:https://amzn.to/2D6tBm5

Are you new here? Follow me on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Google+, or Instagram.

Disclosure of Material Connection: Some of the links in the post above are “affiliate links.” This means if you click on the link and purchase the item, I will receive an affiliate commission. Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will add value to my readers. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.” Read full privacy policy here.

by Leave a Comment

How to Balance a Busy Writing Schedule and a Busy Life

How to Balance a Busy Writing Schedule and a Busy Life is something I’ve had to master. And, believe me, that isn’t always easy. But I have implemented practices that make it easier to maintain the schedule I need to be a writer, wife, mom, caregiver, and all the other hats I wear on a daily basis. Let me share what has worked for me. I hope it can give you some ideas for streamlining your life for productivity.

How to Balance a Busy Writing Schedule and a Busy Life

I’m a wife, homeschooling mom to ten kids (yes 10!), and best-selling author. I’ve had almost 80 books published, and I lead a Teen Mom support group in inner-city Little Rock. The number one thing I’m asked by others is, “How do you do it all?”

If you were to see the piles on my desk and the piles of laundry you’d realize I don’t DO it all. Everything does get done, but not on the same day.

Those seventy-something books have happened over almost thirty years, and I didn’t birth all of our ten kids. I totally cheated and adopted some as teens. (Not that it makes parenting any easier!)

But there is some mindfulness to the madness. Over the years I’ve had to make choices. I don’t watch TV, miss most movies, and (up until very recently) I haven’t had any hobbies except reading. Cutting back on my speaking schedule has allowed me to be home more. I’ve also developed some habits to make my life work better. Here are some things that have worked for me, and maybe some things you might want to try.

How to Balance a Busy Writing Schedule and a Busy Life

  1. I’ve created a rhythm to our day: Daily rhythms are a biggie for me. I have quiet time and write before anyone wakes up. We start homeschool around the same time every day. We have dinner around the table together and nightly bedtime routines. Schedules give our children a sense of order. We all know what to expect in the day, and I make the most of the quiet moments I have in front of my computer, knowing that time is all I’ll probably get.
  2. I pick two to three important things to get done in each day. There are days I need to write 2,000 words. There are days I need to get caught up on laundry. These two things cannot happen on the same day. When I choose what things to focus on, I’m also choosing other things to ignore. This is important. There will never be enough time to do it all in one day. Ever. Making choices relieves stress. I’m able to push nagging thoughts out of my mind, knowing I’ll get to those things all in time.
  3. I set aside times for fun and play. I give attention to my little ones when they first wake up. Then, I try to do the same in the afternoons with their big sisters. Sometimes I color with my kids, and I play a board or card game with them nearly every day. When my kids know they’ll have dedicated time, they don’t have to fight for time (or act up to try to get it) throughout the day.
  4. I seek help. I’ve managed my workload and budget so I can have a woman come in four hours a week to clean. I have an assistant who helps with my blogs and other online help. I have a babysitter/nanny who takes kids to therapy appointments or watches kids a few hours in the afternoon so I can write.

Ten years ago, I was not at this place, but I’ve worked to find people who I can help financially and who can help me.

While you may not be at the place to hire someone, ask yourself if there is someone you can trade with. For years I traded homeschool days with another mom so I’d have a free day. Also, when you see someone who is seemingly “doing it all,” know that person probably has help, too. No one can do it all and balance everything well. No one.

How to Balance a Busy Writing Schedule and a Busy Life

  1. I say NO. My kids aren’t in many activities outside the home. I pick a few things, like the teen mom support group, to volunteer in and I leave it at that. When I think about adding something I then consider what I have to give up. I used to be the worst at overcommitting, but I’ve learned to only say YES to the things I really want to do and that I have time and space for.
  2. I turn to God. God has the answers for my day. His Spirit guides me to what’s most important and how to balance it. God has good plans for me and my family. I’ve learned to take my eyes off the schedule and put them on Him. One way I stay close to God is by reading through the Bible every year. I’ve created a journal and a Facebook group to help you do this too!

There are times I’ve pushed aside writing for a kid who needs one-on-one attention. There are other times when all the kids have played together happily and I’ve been able to sit and work. When I feel a nudge in my spirit, I pause to listen to what God is speaking to me. Even on days when I push writing to the side, God shows me that He can redeem those moments.

Balancing a busy writing schedule and a large family isn’t easy, but it is possible. As I walk out this writing life in front of my kids I’m also displaying what it means to work hard to serve God and people. My kids know I take my work and my service seriously. They also see how God shows up. Life in our era will always be busy … but the good news is we get to choose what to be busy about.

 

 

How to balance is a process and a journey, one that I’ve yet to perfect. But what I’ve learned through trial and error, I share in my book Balanced – Finding Center as a Work-at-Home Mom.

 

(This article first appeared on The Steve Laube Agency https://stevelaube.com/balance-busy-writing-schedule-busy-life/)

 

 

by Leave a Comment

Sleep as a Benefit of Homeschooling

Sleep as a Benefit of Homeschooling

I’d been a homeschooling mom for twenty years when I was forced to have kids in the public school system. I say “forced” because we had kids in foster care and DHS would not let me homeschool them. So for the first time ever I filled out paperwork and had to figure out the schedules of three different schools.

During this time I was homeschooling three children at home. And our new daughters were between the ages of 11 and 15-years-old. Suddenly, I had kids in homeschool, elementary school, junior high, and high school. There were many challenges. I had to figure out how to help kids with homework and how to communicate with various teachers. We had to figure out school lunches and schedules, but

by far the hardest thing to deal with was my kids’ lack of sleep.

You see, on most days my kids wake up around 8:00 a.m., and we start school around 9:00 a.m. This is a far cry from what we’d experienced when they went to public school. I usually had to wake them up around 6:15 a.m. and had to get them to school by 7:40. The mornings were chaos with everyone getting dressed, making lunches, and fighting. There was a lot of fighting because it was a big hassle to get everyone out of bed.

My kids were extremely tired because they often came home with homework. Sometimes we stayed up late finishing it. And on days when they finished homework before 8:00 p.m. we tried to squeeze in family time by hanging out. After all, we hadn’t seen our kids all day.

Sleep as a Benefit of Homeschooling

Because my homeschooling kids finish all their schoolwork during the day there is no homework at night. We have dinner together and participate in taekwondo. Then we hang out and everyone goes to bed at a decent hour. And then, they get to sleep in. With this schedule, my kids get 9-10 hours a night, which is what they need.

Years ago, I was interviewing a doctor, and she told me that most of the problems that parents have with tweens and teens have to do with lack of sleep. Teens are staying up too late and waking up too early. Because they are growing so much, tweens and teens actually need the same amount of sleep as toddlers. And when they don’t get it, they’re like a whole bunch of BIG cranky toddlers running around. I’ve found this to be true.

There are many benefits to homeschooling, and sleep is one of them.

By the time we start school at 9:00 a.m. my kids are awake and ready to learn. We sit down with our Bible Study and our Sonlight Curriculum. There is no rushing out the door. There are no cranky kids … well, if they are it usually isn’t because of lack of sleep. And for that I am thankful.

 

Are you ready to learn how to have True Homeschool Success?

Let me show you what has worked for our family for over two and a half decades. I want to share what’s given us the power so you too can lead your family through home education. Learn more here: True Homeschool Success

 

 

 

by Leave a Comment

How to Stop Your Child’s Angry Cycle

Today we’re talking about how to stop your child’s angry cycle. Once a child is angry, it’s easy for him to stay in a cycle of thoughts, emotions, and physical responses that feed his rage. Here’s what the angry cycle looks like and to stop the spiral.

How to Stop Your Child’s Angry Cycle

The flash of anger in my tween daughter’s eyes surprised me. We’d been camping, and Maddie’s 6-year-old sister, Aly, had just burned her finger on hot ash. As I treat the wound, Maddie strode up. “I hurt myself, too,” she said, with attitude. “Last night when we were making S’mores.”

“Hold on,” I said. As Aly screamed beside me, I tried not to show my frustration. “I need to help your sister first.” This was the first I’d heard of Maddie’s burn.

Maddie’s anger flared. “You always help her first! You don’t care for me at all!” She rushed back to our cabin as I finished bandaging Aly’s hand.

I walked back to the cabin, dreading the confrontation ahead. I could see how the next few minutes would play out: pleas and demands from me, mounting anger and accusations from her. There had to be a better way to manage these cycles of anger. It was making all of us weary, especially Maddie.

What Is An Angry Cycle?

Once a child is angry, it’s easy for him to stay in a cycle of thoughts, emotions and physical responses that feed his rage. Here’s what the angry cycle looks like:

  1. An event creates pain or distress that sets off the child’s anger. This event can be something another person says or does, or an unmet expectation.
  2. The pain triggers thoughts or memories that focus the child’s angry response on another person. For example, he may think you don’t understand his life or that you care more about a sibling.
  3. These “trigger thoughts” lead to a negative emotional response. Your child feels frustrated, rejected, fearful or enraged.
  4. These emotions cause a physical response, such as a flushed face, tense jaw, pounding heart and clenched fists. As anger takes control, a child finds it difficult to think rationally.
  5. Finally, a behavioral response occurs. The trigger thoughts, emotions, and physical reaction evoke a fight, flight or freeze response.

Stopping the Angry Cycle

We often try to lecture our children or teach them a lesson in the midst of their angry cycle — right when they cannot think rationally. Our best efforts at correction will likely not get through when our child is in this highly emotional state; harsh discipline often makes things worse.

This is true of kids of all ages: An emotional, angry teen can’t be any more rational than an emotional, angry toddler.

When one of my children is angry, I know I have to first stop the angry cycle before anything else can happen. I use some of these phrases instead of escalating the interaction:

  • “I see you’re angry.”
  • “I am sorry that happened to you. I’ll be here to talk about it when you’re ready.”
  • “I get angry, too. How can I help?”
  • “When you’re ready, I can tell you how I handle things when I get mad.”
  • “It’s OK to be angry, but think about how you act next. Make good choices.”
  • “I understand you’re angry. But can you try to understand my point?”

When I acknowledge my children’s anger, they see that I’m paying attention. And when I make myself available, my kids can turn to me for help. They do want to make good choices; they just need extra guidance, and they are often grateful for my offer to help instead of simply sending them to their rooms or giving them consequences.

Being available and attentive always works better than simply telling a child to calm down. And choosing the right words in the midst of your child’s angry cycle can defuse the situation and lead to healthy resolution.

Training Kids to Recognize and Stop their own Angry Cycles

When a child gets angry, multiple physical reactions are occurring inside her body. According to one public health organization, “The adrenal glands flood the body with stress hormones, such as adrenaline and cortisol. The brain shunts blood away from the gut and towards the muscles, in preparation for physical exertion. Heart rate, blood pressure and respiration increase.”

We can help our kids understand what’s happening inside their minds and bodies when negative thoughts are triggered so that they don’t get caught up in the angry cycle, which can become a habit….(to read the rest of this article please visit Focus On The Family by clicking on the image below.)

 

How to Stop Your Child’s Angry Cycle with Calming Angry Kids

Calming Angry Kids by Tricia Goyer

 

If you have a child who struggles with anger, or if you know a family that does, be sure to order Calming Angry Kids today. Each of us needs to wake up with hope and lay down in peace—you do, your kids do. Each of us needs to discover that with the right tools, overcoming anger is possible.

There is help. There is hope. There can be calm.

“I felt as though Tricia was sitting next to me sharing her personal stories and giving me help, guidance, and encouragement for my own parenting journey. If you have a child who struggles with anger, sit with Tricia and let her encourage you as well.”

Jamie Ivey
Bestselling author of If You Only Knew, host of the podcast The Happy Hour with Jamie Ivey 

 

Verified by MonsterInsights