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6 Ways to Find Joy in Your Day {Printable!}

6 Ways to bring joy to your day

6 Ways to Find Joy in Your Day {Printable!}

As a homeschooling mom, I’ve had kids at home for 32 years. This means noisy days, busy days, and these kids-are-giving-me-a-headache days.

I’ve been homeschooling for 28 years and still have another seven years to go! Does that seem overwhelming? It would have been if I hadn’t discovered something amazing: JOY!

Over the last year, God has spoken to my heart and encouraged me to find joy in everyday living.

Joy, even though the laundry is piled high.

Joy, even though the kids are cranky.

Joy when work deadlines are pressed.

Joy when I have a headache when my feet hurt, and when I just want a nap. (Which happens often!)

But how do you find joy in your day?

 

Here are 6 ways … and a Scripture verse for each!

1. Thank God for each new morning.

A thankful heart goes a long way. Daily when I wake God, instead of looking at everything I have to do, I thank him for who I am and what I have.

Thank you, God, that I’m your daughter, and I have a place in your eternal home.

Thank you, God, that I’m a wife and mother.

Thank you, God, for the pile of laundry and all the clothes you’ve provided for us.

Thank you, God, for the dishes still in the sink from last night. We went to bed with full bellies.

Printable Scriptures - TriciaGoyer.com

2. Turn on worship music.

I love listening to worship music as I read my Bible and journal in the morning. I put on popular Christian songs as we homeschool. I also listen to Christian music as I write. I love using apps like Spotify or Amazon Prime Music to help me find great music. I also sing along! Singing songs of joy helps sorrows (and frustrations) to disappear!

Printable Scriptures - TriciaGoyer.com3.  Ask God to remind me what His kingdom is all about.

In life, I want to be comfortable. I want my house to be Pinterest-worthy. I want my kids to shine. But when I think about God’s kingdom, He helps me understand Kingdom Work. Opening my door to neighbors. Sharing God’s truth with young moms. Calling a friend who’s going through a hard time. Playing a board game with my kids instead of putting away the laundry. The Kingdom is about people and hearts–not tasks!

Printable Scriptures - TriciaGoyer.com 4. Seek the Holy Spirit.

When did I ever start thinking that I have to handle life alone? God has given us His Holy Spirit to fill, work through, and give us peace. Stopping to pray and ask for God’s Holy Spirit to help me makes a huge difference. The Holy Spirit gives me joy when I have none.

The Holy Spirit gives me joy when I have none. @TriciaGoyer

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Printable Scriptures - TriciaGoyer.com

5. Join the kids in praising God.

The best thing about having three little kids is that they LOVE to praise God. We have “Jesus dance parties” often. We put on kids praise song, clap our hands and dance and sing. They love it, and seeing their joy makes me more joyful.

Printable Scriptures - TriciaGoyer.com

6. Thank God for troubles.

The honest truth is that without troubles, I wouldn’t need God. If everything went smoothly in life I wouldn’t pray or praise as often. When I thank God for troubles, I remind myself that He has everything in control. As the Scriptures say, troubles are an opportunity for joy!

Printable Scriptures - TriciaGoyer.com

I hope you print and use these Scriptures in your day. I’ve found them very helpful.

Download here.

How about you? What do you do to find joy in your day? What’s your favorite Scripture about joy?

Prayer

Dear Heavenly Father, today I pray for my friend. I pray that she may find joy in you. I pray that Your Word will draw her heart to you. I thank you for your Holy Spirit that can plant joy deep in our hearts, even when there are struggles all around.

More Resources

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111 Classic Movies to Share as a Family

Just the other day I was looking for a movie to watch with a friend’s kids. They love High School Musical and all the new movies, but they watch those over and over again. Remembering the movies I loved as a kid–and ones my older kids loved–I started making a list of movies I’d love to share with my young friends. I also asked my Facebook and Twitter friends for input. Enjoy these classic movies to share as a family.

Enjoy these classic movies to share as a family from Tricia Goyer- with a printable!
 

111 Classic Movies to Share as a Family! Yes Please! @TriciaGoyer

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Tricia’s Top Family Movie Picks:

Newsies–My daughter and I love watching it together. The music and dancing are great!

The Sound of Music–I didn’t watch this until I was an adult and now I watch it a few times a year. I’ve been to Austria and I know members of the von Trapp family, so that makes it extra special to me.

The Parent Trap–This was my favorite movie growing up. I didn’t know my biological father so I always dreamed I had a sister out there somewhere. Come to find out I had FOUR sisters!

Beauty and the Beast–This was the first movie I took my son Cory to. He sat through the whole movie, eyes wide.

Annie (1982 version)–I love the music and I love the story. Carol Burnett cracks me up.

The Princess Bride–This is a family favorite. If you are around the Goyers for any length of time you’ll hear us quoting it!

The Sandlot–This was Cory and Nathan’s favorite movie when they were small. Along with The Land Before Time I can sit there and quote the whole movie!

It’s a Wonderful Life–This is my favorite Christmas Movie. I’d always begged my kids to watch it with me. They were turned off by it being black and white but when they finally watched it they loved it too!
 

There are so many classic movies to share as a family!

 

 

 

Click here to download and print the list of 111 Classic Movies to share as a family.

 

Enjoy! And let me know if I missed any of your family’s favorites!

 
Even though this is mainly a list of classic films, I would be remiss if I didn’t at least mention Moms’ Night Out. If you just want some good clean hilarity, you have to see it!
Did you know that I actually wrote the book for Mom’s Night Out? You can actually read What I Learned From Writing Moms’ Night Out. 

 

Moms Night Out

Get the book here.

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A New Family Favorite (& Giveaway!)

A New Family Favorite (Plus a Giveaway!) - TriciaGoyer.com

A New Family Favorite

We have no less than a dozen Bible story books and our kids love to read them. Bella, Casey and Alyssa were excited when the Treasury of Bible Stories arrived. And they were even more excited when I started to read.Treasury Of Bible Stories - TriciaGoyer.com

Rhyming books are always fun. We love Dr. Suess and we love rhymes. What a joy to find a Bible Story book with fun rhymes that catch a child’s interest!Treasury Of Bible Stories - TriciaGoyer.com

There are twenty stories in the book, and when I asked my children which we should read first my four-year-old choose Jesus’ birth and Jesus baptism. This brought up wonderful conversation and the charming illustrations captured their attention too. There are Bible references to go with each story, which is perfect for families to read together–especially for older children who are enjoying the book with younger siblings.

1001141002_resizedThe stories are told in a whimsical way, which is a wonderful first introduction to the Bible for younger children. The meter changes between the stories (and sometimes within the story). It’s no Dr. Suess, but my children still enjoyed it all the same!

My kids LOVED this book. You will too. @TriciaGoyer

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I recommend Treasury of Bible Stories so much, I want to gift one of my readers a copy!

 

a Rafflecopter giveaway

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Don’t Miss Your Kids in All Your “God Projects”

Don't Miss Your Kids in All Your "God Projects" - TriciaGoyer.com



Don’t Miss Your Kids in All Your “God Projects”

 

I’m a project person. I like lists to check off and gold stars (even if they are imagined) placed on my jobs that are well done. As an author I like to type “The End”at the completion of my novels. As a Teen MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers) leader, I like getting into my car after a meeting and letting out a contented sigh, knowing the speaker’s message touched a great need.

The problem is that kids don’t like to be projects. And even if I’ve created the perfect “moment”as a mom, they’ll do something crazy like cut their American Girl doll’s hair off with no warning. (Just like two of my daughters did just last night!)

As a project person, I tend to gravitate toward things I can fix or manage. If faced with cleaning out the refrigerator or coloring with my three young kids, my natural tendency is to let the fridge win. After all, the fridge looks so shiny when it’s done … and the kids’ papers? Not so much, especially when they don’t color in the lines!

Even worse is when a “God Project” is involved. You know what I’m talking about. Doing a good thing for God, like planning a Sunday school lesson or writing an inspiring blog post (ahem). Those things draw me even more than the fridge, mostly because I don’t have to deal with moldy food, but also because I’m doing something for God. Didn’t He say to go into all the world and preach the gospel?

[Read the rest of this post on MomLifeToday.com]

Prayer

God, thank you for my children and the desire I have to serve you. Please open my eyes to see the moments I am missing with my children. Allow me to let go of whatever projects I’m doing that don’t serve my family in the long-run.

I’m a project person. Problem: kids don’t like projects. @TriciaGoyer

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More Resources

Whit’s End Mealtime Devotions: 90 Faith-Building Ideas Your Kids Will Eat Up! by Chrystal Bowman and Tricia Goyer

Lead Your Family Like Jesus by Ken Blanchard, Phil Hodges & Tricia Goyer

Women Living Well by Courtney Joseph

Anything: The Prayer That Unlocked My God & My Soul by Jennie Allen

To celebrate launch of The Lulu Tree Boutique, I’m doing a giveaway!

Ten winners will receive a copy of my book“Life Interrupted.” One grand prize winner will receive “Life Interrupted” and a Lulu Doll! Only those in the U.S. are eligible to win. Winners will receive an email and be announced next week! a Rafflecopter giveaway

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Family Volunteering: Tips & Tricks

Family Volunteering: Tips & Tricks - TriciaGoyer.com

 



Family Volunteering: Tips & Tricks

Give back. Together.

You know the old saying, “It is better to give than receive.” For many families the best gifts they can give is the gift of themselves … through volunteering.

Family volunteering has been an interest to homeschooling advocates for years. Raymond and Dorothy Moore recommend an hour a day of home or community service. Can you imagine how your family (homeschooling or not) could impact the community by volunteering an hour a day? Even an hour a week would add up in the long run! Here’s how to start:

Fit the Activity to the Child

Expose your children to various volunteering opportunities then ask them, ‘What would you like to do?’ Give them resources, then empower them to do it. If your daughter has a lot of energy, or your son enjoys cooking, suggest an activity to match like mowing a neighbors lawn or making cookies for the family next door.

Work as a Team

“Through volunteer work, families spend quality time together, help others, have fun, communicate and develop family self-esteem,” says Lori Goudreau, manager of the Family Service Program. “Parents can reinforce family values, and kids can share their time and talents, and even acquire new skills.”  A lot of what your kids can learn to do will take instruction time from you.  All of that is time well spent together.

“Kids are more likely to stick with an avenue of service if they volunteer beside a parent or grandparent,” my friend Jan Johnson reminded me. Volunteering within the context of their family gives kids the security they need to reach out to others.

Be Prepared

When preparing for a volunteer activity it’s important to know what to expect.

Here are some questions to ask:

  • Where do we need to go?
  • When do we need to be there?
  • Who will we report to?
  • What are we expected to bring?
  • and … Why is our role important?

Knowing what to expect ahead of time will help children approach their tasks with confidence.

Having expectations will help children approach their tasks with confidence. @TriciaGoyer

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Give Feedback

Kids love to know when they’ve done a good job. After volunteering, talk to your child about the experience. Let her know how it makes you feel to see her acting in such a mature and giving nature. It will be just the thing that will make your child want to do it again.

Value the Lessons They Learn

I have discovered with my own kids that volunteering helped them establish their identity. When my daughter Leslie was 10-years-old, she used to baby-sit at our local crisis pregnancy center. In return, she discovered that her caring attitude and helping heart was valuable to many young moms in need. It’s a discovery that has impacted her as she’s grown into a young adult.

“Beyond citizenship, kids can learn so many other life-lessons from charity,” adds Kathy Saulitis, director of Kids Care, a national volunteer organization designed specifically for children. “They learn cooperation, tolerance, problem-solving, communication, self-awareness, confidence, respect for life and loyalty.”

And what mom doesn’t want that for her kids?

The same spirit that inspired President Kennedy to create the Peace Corps on a national level can be a very real part of the lives of you and your children. Your family can be a blessing to those in your community, and you’ll benefit as well!

Prayer

God, thank you for my family. Give us opportunities to give back to our community together. Give us a common love for the people and place nearby. Help us to value the lessons we learn as a team.

 

More Resources

Doing Good Together was founded in 2004 on the belief that when parents engage with their children in community service, they pass along the spirit of giving and goodness to their sons and daughters, strengthen their families, and create a new generation of volunteers, philanthropists, and kind, caring adults.

The Intentional Family: Simple Rituals to Strengthen Family Ties by Willian J. Doherty

The Busy Family’s Guide to Volunteering: Do Good, Have Fun, Make a Difference as a Family! by Jenny Friedman

Wide-Open World: How Volunteering Around the Globe Changed One Family’s Lives Forever by John Marshall

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Surviving The Strong-Willed Child

Are you currently surviving a strong-willed child? I used to laugh when my mother-in-law, Darlyne, told me how my husband was a strong-willed child. That was until our daughter turned out to be exactly like her dad. Maybe some of the tools I used will help you in your parenting journey.

Surviving The Strong-Willed Child

I used to laugh when my mother-in-law, Darlyne, told me how my husband was a strong-willed child. That was until our daughter turned out to be exactly like her dad.

Darlyne used to tell stories about when John was a baby. She said he’d crawl to the nearest electrical outlet and want to stick his finger in it. Telling him no, she’d gently slap his hand, and pull him away. And yet, he’d return. She’d do that over and over, trying to hinder him. She’d turn his attention to something else, trying to distract him. Finally, she’d give up, and she’d have to cover the outlet.

“But I learned as he grew that his strong will benefited him in the long run,” Darlyne told me. I believed her.

I learned as he grew that his strong will benefited him in the long run. @TriciaGoyer

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A scrawny high schooler, John was told he’d never make it in the Marines. So he joined. He not only made it, but he graduated top of his class. In the military, he stayed true to God, even when alcohol and women were readily available to him. All through life, he has lived as a man of honor and excels in his work. His strong will has taken him far.

Hope for Surviving The Strong-Willed Child

This, of course, wasn’t comforting as I dealt with my own strong-willed child. Leslie was a sweet baby doll her first year of life, but things changed once she turned 2. She’d have tantrums if she didn’t get her way. She would hide behind me and refuse to talk when people approached her. If I gave her a blue cup, she wanted the red one. If I offered a cookie, she’d want a cracker and vice versa. Each day was a battle—my will against hers. There were days I loved my child but didn’t like her that much.

The parenting class Growing Kids God’s Way helped a lot. I can’t remember everything that was taught, but here are some things that I stuck to along the way.

I narrowed my daughter’s choices.

Instead of offering a blue cup and her demanding a green one, I’d offer both colors and let her pick from those two. Of course, she’d then want the red cup, but I didn’t give in. She had to pick between the two. This worked for clothes, snacks, and other things. I’d still give my daughter a choice, but I’d limit those choices. After a while, the battles stopped. She soon understood that I wouldn’t give in to her whines.

I prepared her for interaction.

If we were going to church, I’d explain possible things that could happen, such as people introducing themselves or commenting on her pretty dress. I’d role-play the correct response with her. And then I’d reward her when she responded correctly. I soon discovered that with some instruction, my daughter not only responded correctly, but she soon came out of her shell and became a chatterbox.

I stood by my word.

Even if my daughter disagreed or challenged me, I didn’t give in. I learned that giving in was showing her that a bad attitude would get her what she wanted—and that’s not what I wanted to reward. Once that no longer worked, she discovered that behaving well got her the best results.

I focused her strong will on positive things.

Academics, piano, and friendships – I gave her the tools to excel in things she was good at, using her will as a benefit. And when the going got tough, she dug in.

I focused on filling her love tank.

My daughter is a quality time and gifts person. She gets excited when I bring her a pack of gum or her favorite lip gloss from the store. She loves when I take her to coffee or when we go to lunch. As we spent time face-to-face, my daughter opened up about everything she was dealing with. She even confessed to some areas that she struggled with. I discovered that she wasn’t as strong as she liked everyone to believe. When I filled her love tank, her will weakened, and we built a bond that has remained for years.

Those are a few simple things that helped me.

As the months passed, my daughter’s attitude changed and I enjoyed her more and more. I also discovered her strong will did help her excel. At 22, she lives with two roommates in the Czech Republic, and she shares her faith with teens in a place where 90% of people are unchurched. When her peers are still in college, she already has her degree and moved on to mission work. Her will pushed her through four years of college by the time before she was twenty-one. Her will has helped her adjust to a new country and find ways to push through spiritual barriers in this former Communist land.

Looking back, I’m appreciative that God made her who she is for a reason. With a will like that, she’ll be able to do many things for God’s glory! I can’t wait to see what else God has in store!

 

Prayer:

God, THANK YOU for my strong-willed child! They have a valiant sense of strength. I’m honored to have the opportunity to instill valuable character traits in them. Guide my patience, my parenting tools, and my own sense of strength.

 

Download the pdf here!

Need Help Focusing Your Family on Gratitude?

The Goyer home—made up of two parents, eight kids, and one grandmother with dementia—is never without noise, mess, and, often, complaining. And it’s not just the kids grumbling. Adopting seven children in less than six years has been an adjustment, but it’s time to move out of survival-mode and into growth-mode. So the family decides to tackle the impossible: a grumble-free year. What could possibly go awry?

The Grumble-Free Year follows the Goyers as they go complaint-free and discover what it looks like to develop hearts of gratitude. They share their plans, successes, failures, and all the lessons learned along the way, offering not only a front-row seat to the action but also real-life steps for uncovering hearts that are truly thankful.

Read the first chapter of The Grumble Free Year HERE!

 

 

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Parenting: The Power of Teachable Moments

As a parent, it’s important to leverage The Power of Teachable Moments. But how we do that matters. Kindness, grace, and mercy can help when taking the stuff of everyday life and using it to lead our kid’s in wisdom. Here are some tips to guide you.

 

Parenting: The Power of Teachable Moments

It was an ordinary day.

I was leaving the doctor’s office with my three kids when the homeless man approached us. He was in a wheelchair and he was missing a leg. I’d just gotten the kids buckled into their car seats when he approached asking for food. I “just so happened” to have a packed lunch with me. I’d also been to the bakery, and I’d picked up some donuts as a treat for my grandma.

I gave the man the lunch and offered him the biggest donut. His eyes grew wide. “Is this cream-filled?” It turned out it was and the man’s face filled with joy. He ate it with pleasure.

It was only as I backed away that I realized my kids had been watching everything.

It was only as I backed away that I realized my kids had been watching everything. @TriciaGoyer

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Even though I never intended it to be, that was a teachable moment.

We talked about homelessness and caring for those God brings in our path. We talked about sharing what we had. About kindness. And that night—as the kids shared about the experience with their dad—we talked about it again.

How can you take advantage of the unexpected, teachable moments in life? Here are some ideas from experts (and expert moms).

Creative Conversation

“Learn the art of meandering conversation. When you’re working a puzzle with your kids or riding in the car together, talk about worries or other crisis times. As a way to get started, use something you heard about, something you saw on TV, or something that happened to you as a child.” —Ron Rose, Seven Things Kids Never Forget

I especially love the idea of sharing stories from my own childhood. There are lessons each of us have learned that can be passed on to our kids.

Be real

“When I fail, when I say something really stupid, I ask my children’s forgiveness.” —Maxine, mother of four children

Being real means owning up to our faults and exhibiting what it means to be humble and thoughtful. Seeing the way we respond will teach our children how to act.

 

 

Show you care

“When uncertainty clouds your children’s vision, lead them to their knees in prayer–pray with them often and about everything.” —John William Smith, Hugs for Mom

One day on the way to town we saw an accident and I told my kids we should pray for the drivers. Now every time they see an accident (or even someone pulled over!) my children want to pray. Whenever I see a concern or worry in their gazes over anything I know it’s time to pray.

Be available

“When my children ask me a question, I make a point to stop whatever I am doing to answer it right away. I want them to know I place priority on them and their questions.” —Tamela, mother of two

I’ve found that eye contact with my children makes a big difference. When I take time to focus on their faces a connection is made. If they’re coming to me I want my children to know I’m available and I care. If I don’t take time to listen to my children about the little things, they won’t come to me about the big issues of life.

 

 

Take advantage of all life’s situations

“I try to share words of wisdom during fun times, like when we’re enjoying popcorn and a movie or picking flowers outside. It’s then that they’re more likely to listen.” —Cindy, mother of five

Give your time

“It is clear to me that the time [my children and I] spent together in those formative years strengthened our relationships in their teenage years. Our time together bonded us to each other and laid a foundation of open communication, helping us establish mutual trust and loyalty that grew into a warm, lasting friendship.” —Donna J. Miller, Growing Little Women

I’ve found that bonds are built when I appreciate my children’s strengths. Making a list of those strengths, thanking God for them, and praising our children makes a difference in their hearts. And as they grow the connection grows!

Today’s Post is Printable!

Click here to download the .pdf of highlights, points to remember, and further questions to apply to your parenting.

 

 

How about you? How do you take advantage of teachable moments with your children? Here’s a prayer to help you bring God into all the moments that make up your day.

Prayer

God, show me the moments that I can use with my children. Allow us to take advantage of every second by creatively conversing and experiencing life together. Make me sensitive to the moments of life that will have a big impact on my child’s life.

 

In Him,

Tricia

 

More Resources

Growing Little Women by Donna J. Miller

 

Hugs for Mom by John William Smith

 

Seven Things Kids Never Forget by Ron Rose

 

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In the World, Not of It: The Christian Bubble

In The World, Not Of It - The Christian Bubble - TriciaGoyer.com



In the World, Not of It: The Christian Bubble

 

When we moved to Little Rock in 2010, I knew it would be easy to slip into the Bible Belt bubble. My husband’s job was with a Christian organization (FamilyLife), so surrounding ourselves with like-minded friends would be easy. Big, beautiful churches are within a few miles of our home, and I knew we could make great friends at church, too.

But is that all life is about—to be surrounding with fellow Christians and enjoy life? Deep inside I felt it wasn’t. How could I raise my child to believe the concept of “giving to the least of these” when I wasn’t making the effort to cross town and reach out?

Bubble-Breaking Church

We started by attending an inner-city church (mosaicchurch.net). We were surrounded by people who weren’t like us in many ways. I also began a support group for teenage mothers, and my town teens helped with it. My son Nathan was our door monitor, letting the young moms in. (Because of the area, we cannot leave the church doors unlocked). My daughter Leslie volunteered to babysit every week, and my toddler daughter, Alyssa, made quick friends with the other kids. Coming from Montana (and a church where most of the people were like us), we felt we were breaking out of the bubble big time . . . but was that enough?

Bubble-Breaking Neighborhood

When we go to church or the grocery store, we see homeless people and lower-income people on a daily basis. As we built relationships within the inner city, we realized it’s not about “us helping them”—we realized we’re all the same and Jesus loves us all. Making a point to spend time in the inner city has increased our compassion as we build friendships and discover that we can find amazing people no matter where we live.

Show children they can be the hands and feet of Jesus as you give, love, and serve together. @TriciaGoyer

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But isn’t Our Job as Parents to Help Our Kids Stay Innocent?

Right now our kids at home are twenty, seven, four, and almost four-years-old, but two are out of the nest and living amazing lives. My older kids have been volunteering to help with teenage moms since they were elementary-school age. I remember when my daughter first started helping to babysit; she was only eight years old and heard all types of things come out of the mouths of the teen moms, like who was sleeping with whom, who had what disease, etc. At first I was horrified . . . my poor, innocent girl! Yet her questions about what she heard opened up amazing conversations about sexual purity, life choices, the way people are raised, economic poverty, etc.

Because of those conversations, my daughter became passionate about purity—after all she saw the consequences of sex outside of marriage. Just today I was talking via Skype to Leslie, who is on a two-month mission trip to the Czech Republic, and she told me she was asked to speak to a church youth group about sexual purity. You’ll never know how God will use your kids and how He’ll prepare them.

That being said, I have three young kids and I do my best to protect them. We do need to protect those little ears at times, especially during the ages when we can’t sit and have a long conversation about what they just heard.

But the Thought of Exposing My Kids Makes Me Nervous

Yes, anxiety comes when we expose our children to the hard things of life. As a parent, we want to protect our children. We want to keep them as innocent as we can, as long as possible. Yet we also must “go yet into the world.” (Isn’t that what Jesus commanded?) Needy, hurting people who need Christ are everywhere. The greatest example we can give our children of obeying Jesus is to show them people (who sometimes make bad choices and live hard lives) are different than us but that those people need to know about Jesus, too. It’s our job to tell them about Him!

As Christian parents, we don’t need to show our kids smut for smut’s sake. Instead, we need to point out people in need and show them that Jesus can transform anyone. Show them we can be the hands and feet of Jesus as we give, love, and serve.

Prayer

Thank you for placing me in a world that needs your love. Bring me opportunities to break out of my normal pattern of living in order to show your love to the people that need it.

More Resources

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In the World, Not of It: Protecting Innocence

In the World, Not of It: Protecting Innocence - TriciaGoyer.com

In the World, Not of It: Protecting Innocence

 

“I will refuse to look at anything vile and vulgar. I hate all who deal crookedly; I will have nothing to do with them.” Psalm 101:3 (NLT)

I can remember the first horror film I watched was when I was in third or fourth grade. The plot line was about a man who moved into a haunted house and then uncovers all the horror that happened there. I’m scarred for life, seriously. Who let me watch that? (Sorry, Mom and Dad, but it’s true.) I thought about that movie many times over the years. It didn’t leave me. That movie (and others that followed) brought fears and dark thoughts.

I’m sure at the time I begged to watch it and other movies I also still remember—those with sex and violence and foul language. When I was a kid, MTV and HBO had just shown up on the scene. Television was no longer a “safe” place . . . and I was drawn to all the smut. What kid isn’t? I wanted to feel grown-up. I liked being scared and having my heart race at both romance and danger.

The thing is, as a kid, I didn’t know what to do with buds of the sinful desires that were also stirred up.

Sure, I’d watch Fraggle Rock during the day, but at night when my friends were staying over, we’d turn the TV down and watch movies I’m too embarrassed to name. Then there were the popular songs at the time. How many times could one sing “Like a Virgin” by Madonna without the words making an impact? (I’m sure glad that I didn’t grow up with the Internet; kids today have many more temptations!)

So where did that leave me? At thirteen when I got my first boyfriend, my innocence was already gone—or at least that’s what it felt like. So when I started dating a handsome, older boyfriend, getting caught up in the emotion was easy. After all that’s what those people on those movies did.

I don’t think I consciously made an effort to surrender my innocence.

It was never that simple. By the time my boyfriend gave me my first kiss my innocence had been stripped away one movie, one lusty song at a time. I didn’t have a sense of “Should I do this?” Instead, I thought “Finally.” After all those years of watching “romance,” I finally was experiencing a bit of it myself.

As a mom, I went to the extreme with protecting my kids, or so some people thought. My children couldn’t listen to secular music, and I monitored all their television. They couldn’t watch Jurassic Park until they were in junior high and Wizard of Oz was pretty much off limits until then.

I even homeschooled my kids so I could be the gatekeeper of what entered their lives. I’m thankful I did. My intention at the time may have been to protect my kids’ innocence, but the close relationships built during those years—and mostly their relationships with God—are our reward.

Turn to God for strength and wisdom in leading your kids toward all things pure. @TriciaGoyer

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We need to step out of our Christian circles and impact the world. I believe that.

There’s a difference between my daughter accidentally overhearing a conversation between two pregnant teens than me allowing a movie with sexually promiscuity into our home. If you’ve reached out to and are walking with others, in a dirty world you’re going to get messy at times. Though we should model grace and compassion for our kids, we should never risk their innocence for the sake of entertainment.

Did protecting my kids’ innocence work? No and yes.

In their growing-up years they still watched things they shouldn’t (when I didn’t know) and one of my children as a teen found a way to get around some of the safety protections we set up on the Internet and was drawn into places this teen should never have been. So I wasn’t able to protect my kids completely. But in many ways they were allowed to stay kids longer. Their minds weren’t filled with the smut, and it gave more room for God’s word and a relationship with Jesus to grow.

“And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.” Philippians 4:8 (NLT)

Protecting your child’s innocence may call you to higher standards for yourself.

You might even need to make sacrifices of money and time (especially if God calls you to homeschooling, too). But know that your effort will pay off. We only have a short season when we’re able to protect our children. Don’t let the world’s standards influence you. Instead turn to God for strength and wisdom for guidance in leading your kids toward all things pure.

Prayer

Lord, fix my thoughts on truth, honor, and purity. Give me heavenly standards. Show me ways I protect the innocence around me in my day.

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10 Ways to Get your Child’s Attention without Yelling | Guest Post by Jenny Herman

Family Playing in the Snow, Father Making Snow Angel

10 Ways to Get your Child’s Attention without Yelling

Parenting teaches you a lot about yourself, doesn’t it? You’ve probably been tempted to scream at your kids more times than you’d care to admit. You’re not alone.
Have you ever heard the “wah wah wah wah” of Charlie Brown’s teacher come out of your mouth? Have you ever wanted to jump on the table and yell to the rafters? Have you ever heard yourself say, “Why won’t you listen to me?” This list is for you.

Wondering why your child won’t listen to you? Get tips from @manyhatsmommyMI and @TriciaGoyer:

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Use these ideas to get your child’s attention without screaming. They’ve been tested by a mom of a child with high-functioning autism, a mom of two very energetic young boys—me!

  1. Turn off electronics: More than likely your child’s attention will improve greatly when you ask him to turn off the TV or video game while you ask him a question.
  2. Make noise: Clap a pattern or use a whistle or some other noisemaker.
  3. Whisper: Sometimes when I feel myself getting very angry I choose to whisper to calm myself and get my son’s attention at the same time. I bend down so I’m more on his level and whisper in his ear. It works!
  4. Use sing song tones: My son with Asperger’s syndrome sometimes tunes out the whole world. He also doesn’t prefer singing most days. I’ve learned when I use a sing song voice he often pays attention more quickly because he wants it to stop.
  5. Be silly: Being silly gets your child’s attention and also breaks up tension if it’s been a rough day.
  6. Get physical: In my home, boys have LOTS of energy and need to get it out. If you have the time, give your child something physical to do first, then have your discussion or give the directions. The physical activity will help him pay attention better afterward. It doesn’t have to be a lot—say twenty jumping jacks or run around the table five times.
  7. Speak in funny voices: Again, one way to break into your child’s ability to tune out the world is to sound different. Sometimes I cup my hands around my mouth and talk in a silly robotic-sounding voice.
  8. Incorporate sign language: When my boys were young they learned some sign language before they could talk. The sign for “no” has come in handy out in public and across a busy room. Instead of yelling or embarrassing my child by calling attention to an inappropriate behavior, I just catch his eye and sign “no”.
  9. Utilize a timer: Does your child get engrossed in a project and it’s hard to pull her out? Instead of repeating yourself five times and letting your blood pressure rise, let the timer be your police! Go over, tell your child, “In five minutes Mommy needs to talk to you.” Then set the timer and let the beeping or buzzing be an audio cue. Warning: The timer is for you, too. Don’t ignore it and put off your child. That sabotages the tool.
  10. Wait: If you’ve been talking to your child and you can tell she’s not listening, stop talking. Wait until she notices the silence and looks up to see why you stopped.
How to get your child’s attention WITHOUT yelling (via @manyhatsmommyMI @TriciaGoyer):

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Of course we all still have times when we lose it. Hopefully these ten tips will help you feel like Charlie Brown’s teacher less often and bring a bit of calm to your home. Do you have other things that have worked for you? I’d love to hear about them!

About Jenny

jennyAs the Public Relations manager for Home Educating Family, Jenny Herman enjoys interacting with homeschoolers through HEDUA’s social media and her special needs column in their magazine. She and her husband Greg are learning to view life through the eyes of their sons—one with an Autism Spectrum disorder and one with a propensity for pretending. You’ll find lots of interesting stories about finding grace in autism over at her blog, ManyHatsMommy.com.

by 4 Comments

10 Ways to Get your Child’s Attention without Yelling | Guest Post by Jenny Herman

Family Playing in the Snow, Father Making Snow Angel

10 Ways to Get your Child’s Attention without Yelling

Parenting teaches you a lot about yourself, doesn’t it? You’ve probably been tempted to scream at your kids more times than you’d care to admit. You’re not alone.

Have you ever heard the “wah wah wah wah” of Charlie Brown’s teacher come out of your mouth? Have you ever wanted to jump on the table and yell to the rafters? Have you ever heard yourself say, “Why won’t you listen to me?” This list is for you.

Wondering why your child won’t listen to you? Get tips from @manyhatsmommyMI and @TriciaGoyer:

Click To Tweet

Use these ideas to get your child’s attention without screaming. They’ve been tested by a mom of a child with high-functioning autism, a mom of two very energetic young boys—me!

  1. Turn off electronics: More than likely your child’s attention will improve greatly when you ask him to turn off the TV or video game while you ask him a question.
  2. Make noise: Clap a pattern or use a whistle or some other noisemaker.
  3. Whisper: Sometimes when I feel myself getting very angry I choose to whisper to calm myself and get my son’s attention at the same time. I bend down so I’m more on his level and whisper in his ear. It works!
  4. Use sing song tones: My son with Asperger’s syndrome sometimes tunes out the whole world. He also doesn’t prefer singing most days. I’ve learned when I use a sing song voice he often pays attention more quickly because he wants it to stop.
  5. Be silly: Being silly gets your child’s attention and also breaks up tension if it’s been a rough day.
  6. Get physical: In my home, boys have LOTS of energy and need to get it out. If you have the time, give your child something physical to do first, then have your discussion or give the directions. The physical activity will help him pay attention better afterward. It doesn’t have to be a lot—say twenty jumping jacks or run around the table five times.
  7. Speak in funny voices: Again, one way to break into your child’s ability to tune out the world is to sound different. Sometimes I cup my hands around my mouth and talk in a silly robotic-sounding voice.
  8. Incorporate sign language: When my boys were young they learned some sign language before they could talk. The sign for “no” has come in handy out in public and across a busy room. Instead of yelling or embarrassing my child by calling attention to an inappropriate behavior, I just catch his eye and sign “no”.
  9. Utilize a timer: Does your child get engrossed in a project and it’s hard to pull her out? Instead of repeating yourself five times and letting your blood pressure rise, let the timer be your police! Go over, tell your child, “In five minutes Mommy needs to talk to you.” Then set the timer and let the beeping or buzzing be an audio cue. Warning: The timer is for you, too. Don’t ignore it and put off your child. That sabotages the tool.
  10. Wait: If you’ve been talking to your child and you can tell she’s not listening, stop talking. Wait until she notices the silence and looks up to see why you stopped.
How to get your child’s attention WITHOUT yelling (via @manyhatsmommyMI @TriciaGoyer):

Click To Tweet

Of course we all still have times when we lose it. Hopefully these ten tips will help you feel like Charlie Brown’s teacher less often and bring a bit of calm to your home. Do you have other things that have worked for you? I’d love to hear about them!

About Jenny

jennyAs the Public Relations manager for Home Educating Family, Jenny Herman enjoys interacting with homeschoolers through HEDUA’s social media and her special needs column in their magazine. She and her husband Greg are learning to view life through the eyes of their sons—one with an Autism Spectrum disorder and one with a propensity for pretending. You’ll find lots of interesting stories about finding grace in autism over at her blog, ManyHatsMommy.com.

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