pregnant Archives - Tricia Goyer

I remember the day I found out I was pregnant. I was 17-years-old and a senior in high school. The news was BAD in every way. My boyfriend dumped me when I didn’t have an abortion. I dropped out of school because I was so embarrassed of being pregnant. Yet that dark day turned into something beautiful.

When I was six months pregnant I dedicated my heart to God. I told Him that I wanted to live His way and not my own. My future started looking bright! I then started praying for my future husband, and God brought me an amazing, godly guy. We were married when my son Cory was 9 months old.

“Well that’s good for you,” you might be thinking. “But that doesn’t happen every day. That can’t happen to me. God can’t help me—won’t help me like that.”

Friend, I think He might. He wants you to turn to Him. He wants to provide a good life for you and your child. And he might even bring you an amazing, godly husband. How do I know? I’m not the only one He’s done it for. Below is a story from my friend Kelly. I met her at one of my speaking events. Here’s her story in her words:

“You are probably my only friend who will never get married or have kids,” said my friend just one week before I found out I was pregnant and just ten months before I met my future husband. Life can change in an instant. I realized my life’s course had drastically changed direction on what is known on my calendar as Black Monday.

Black Monday was the catalyst that propelled me away from eating movie-theater butter popcorn and a bottle wine for dinner to healthy home cooked meals. From repeatedly getting into superficial relationships revolving around sex to a committed marriage revolving around God (with sex as a perk <smile>.) From avoiding God because I feared Him to facing fears with God as my deepest and safest confidant. I still experience times of exercising faith without “feeling” it and overwhelming sense of fear, but they are less and less all the time. I am still convinced God is good, He is for me and not against me, He is faithful to me. Period. Black Monday was the start of my path in believing these things.

Several weeks before Black Monday my mom and asked if I thought I could be pregnant because of some recent gut issues. Adamant and defensive, I assured her that was not possible. Her mom wiles were sharp that night, and she told me how my younger sister found condoms in my apartment. Busted. This was God’s grace, showing me the truth in love. But I wasn’t ready to face the fact that my lifestyle needed healing.

After weeks of denial and bad gas, I was at a lunch date with girlfriends. One of them shared tons of strange symptoms that I totally identified with. The culmination of stories about her GI track irritations came to a roaring crescendo… she was pregnant! Fear seized my mind. I had to get out of there, find Planned Parenthood and “flush out whatever is in there.” God totally intervened. My girlfriend followed me out, all the while trying to talk me out of a panic and an abortion. She grabbed my shoulders and said, “Kelly! You are not thinking clearly.” Miraculously I just biked home. God saved Toby’s life.

As soon as I got home I took a test. The reality of being pregnant was so harsh I went outside for fresh air to help me stop hyperventilating. As soon as I got outside (to really drive the point home), I witnessed two ducks mating right before my crying eyes. The Lord. Is. Hilarious.

Shortly after finding out I was pregnant, I heard Tricia give her testimony. My heart was softened and that night I made a list of values I wanted in a husband and began praying for him every day until I met him 4 weeks after Toby was born. Five months after we met, we were married and Toby was adopted.

God is a god of miracles.

I love Kelly’s story. I love how her bad news was turned into a blessing! I’ve heard similar stories from so many young women who dared to take these steps of faith:

Turn your life over to God. You’ve been trying to do things on your own and you’ve messed up. Admit that to Him. (Don’t worry, He won’t be surprised.) Ask God to forgive you and give you a good future.
Start praying for your future husband. Consider reading Praying for Your Future Husband and praying along with the book. Think of all the positive, godly qualities you want in a husband and pray for those things.
Pray for your baby and dedicate him/her to God. You never know how God will use your child! Even if the world may say that your child is a mistake or accident, that’s not the truth. God created your child in your womb and has good plans for your child’s life!
Open your heart to those who want what’s best for you. It may be a parent or a friend. Surround yourself with people who love God and want His best for you. The road won’t be easy, but good friends help you on your walk.
Consider reading Teen Mom. This book was written just for YOU. Know that other teen moms have gone on to lead amazing, beautiful lives … and you can, too!

Click here for more resources for teen moms!

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Pro-life for Kids: Ideas for Teaching the Sanctity of Life

The little feet pin glinted on the woman’s lapel. The feet and toes were tiny. It was as if a fairy had landed upon her blouse, left gold footprints, and fluttered away. I pointed to the pin. “That’s so cute.”

The older woman smiled. “Those are the size of the feet of a 12-week-old fetus.”

A fist of pain hit my gut, and I looked away before she saw the agony in my face. Why hadn’t anyone told me?

I was 16 at the time, and a year prior I’d had an abortion. The lady at the clinic told me there was “just a blob of tissue” inside me.

Lies. All lies.

Sanctity of Pre-born Life — It’s never to early to teach children the sanctity of pre-born life.

When I had my own children I wanted them to know the truth about the development and sanctity of unborn babies. I checked out books at the library on fetal development. I let my children hold a tiny model of a developing baby at a display at the fair. I wanted them to make better decisions than I had, to be a voice for life, and be able to counsel friends facing tough decisions—such as whether to carry a child when facing an unplanned pregnancy.

It’s never too early to teach our children. Here are numerous ideas for parents on how to teach children at each stage of development about the sanctity of pre-born life. <click to tweet>

Starting from infancy, build a foundation of truth.

Parents are a child’s first teachers, and the messages we share with them from an early age impacts how they see and experience life. My friend Wendy painted each of her children’s names on their bedroom walls, followed by, “Before you were born I knew you. Jeremiah 1:5.”

“This saying was the first thing my youngest daughter looked at as she lay on her changing table getting her diaper changed,” says Wendy. “Now she looks at this saying above her desk as she colors in her coloring books or practices writing her name. To help her, I point to her name on the wall, ‘Alexa, A-L-E-X-A, before you were born God knew you.’”

Training toddlers opens up their eyes to God’s creation.

Parents guide toddlers in understanding the world. They are awed by nature, animals, and newborn babies. It’s our job to foster this awe, and teach that it is God who created everything.

Read a child’s Bible story of creation and teach your toddler that all life comes from God.
Sing, “He’s got the whole world in His hands,” and name people in your family from the youngest to the oldest. Describe how God cared for each of these people from the first moment in their mommy’s tummy.
Next time you are at a clothing store, show your toddler the different sizes of baby clothes. Teach how a baby starts so small that we can’t see it, to being big enough to fit into those clothes.
If you have a pregnant friend or family member, ask her to share a photo of an ultrasound. If you have an ultrasound photo of your child, share that and rejoice over the different parts they see.
Have your child draw a picture of their room and discuss that inside their mommy’s tummy was their first room. Have the toddler draw a picture of what he or she might have looked like inside mommy’s tummy.

Elementary school is an age of discovery.

In elementary school children begin to understand that the way they view the world is often different from how others view it. Teach your children that you follow what God says in the Bible, even when others don’t agree.

Read Before You Were Born, by Joan Lowery Nixon. The first line says, “Long before the rocks shook and pushed upward to become mountains, God dreamed of you.” Teach that even though others believe that man was formed from nothing, the truth is the we were first formed in God’s mind…even before our bodies were formed in our Mommy’s uterus.
Have a Korean birthday party. To believe in the sanctity of life is to affirm that life begins at conception, and many cultures (including Korea) celebrate this in a special way. “My daughter has a Korean boy in her class who just had a birthday,” says Loring, a missionary mom in Uganda. “She learned in Korea they count the nine months in utero as the beginning of their age. So her friend just turned nine years old and nine months.”Remind your child of their “true” age on their birthday … or acknowledge the special day nine months prior to their next birthday.
Work with your child to memorize Psalm 139:14: “Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it.” Then discuss all the parts of our body and how they work. (Eat a cookie, listen to the noises outside the front door, touch various surfaces around your house.) Then look at The Human Body Book and DVD.) Fetal development is described in detail. Relate how the parts of our body were already being formed even before our mommies knew about us.
Write your a list of interesting facts about babies within the womb such as: By week eight every organ is in place and growing, and at week twelve an embryo has fingernails.
Read Horton Hears a Who, by Dr. Seuss. The story is about an elephant named Horton who hears a noise and discovers there’s a colony of “Who’s” living in a dust speck. He rescues them and receives mocking from a kangaroo who thinks Horton is a fool for trying to save something that doesn’t exist. One great line from this book says:

“Should I put this speck down? … If I do, these small persons may come to great harm.I can’t put it down. And I won’t! After allA person’s a person. No matter how small.”

Have your child describe how this is true for preborn babies, too.

Read the rest of this post over at MomLife Today!

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