Does your schedule seem too full? Are you wondering how you’re going to survive the upcoming school year? That’s me. This year, I have three school-aged kids still at home, but I’ve had as many as eight at one time and I’m trying to figure out what we can add. I’m also re-evaluating what needs to be cut. God has given each of us 24 hours, and if things are too crazy-busy, it’s a sign something needs to change. And we’re the only ones who can do it.
So before the school year starts, here are four things you need to cut from your schedule.
(Also, use these four tips to gauge any activity before you clear a space for it on your calendar!)
1. Cut out anything you said YES to because of guilt…
or because you didn’t want to say no. You know what I’m talking about. You signed up to help at the church . . . because all the other ladies were. You signed up to help with that walk-a-thon because no one else did. Guilt should not be your motivator. God’s directives are usually a still and quiet leading in your heart.
2. Cut out anything that doesn’t work for the season you’re in.
Are there activities or events you used to look forward to but that now seem to be just time-wasters? People grow and change. Kids grow and change. Go through your schedule and interview each activity. Ask, “Why do you need to stay there for THIS season of my life?”
3. Cut out anything your kids aren’t enjoying.
Yes, we often believe all children NEED to play t-ball or take dance lessons, but if they aren’t enjoying it, then why do it? Follow their lead and explore their natural gifts and talents instead.
4. Cut out anything God asks you to.
Sometimes the things we’re asked to cut don’t make sense, yet God knows the future. One year I felt God tell me to cut out a lot of my writing and blogging commitments. It turns out that next year we brought four new girls into our home. Seek God. Ask Him to evaluate your schedule. Listen to His still, small voice, and obey.
What about you? How do you decide what to cut or add to your schedule?
Hope and Refreshment for Homeschooling Parents
Need more ideas and advice on homeschooling? Pick up a copy of Homeschool Basics. Receive tried-and-true homeschool advice from veteran homeschooling moms Tricia Goyer and Kristi Clover. We dish out practical help on getting started and staying the course. Homeschool Basics will remind you that the best homeschooling starts with the heart. Packed with ideas to help you push aside your fears and raise kids who will grow to be life-long learners.
Kristi and I believe that homeschooling can transform your life, your home, and your family. Mostly, we believe homeschooling can truly prepare your children for the life God’s called them to live.
Do you feel as if you’re spinning your wheels in life? Does it feel as if you’re working too hard and not getting anywhere? Or maybe you have a hard time getting started, and you’re not making the kind of progress you want. This can be progress with your kids, homeschooling, work, following your dreams, or a million other things.
We often find ourselves spinning our wheels because we’re stuck in the mud of our emotions.
We work hard, but instead of focusing on the progress, we focus on the too-long to-do list. We see where we are falling short instead of where we’re succeeding. Yeah, I have a bad habit of doing that, too!
There are so many things we don’t even start because we’re so sure we’re just going to fail. We judge ourselves or our work before we even give ourselves a chance. How fair is that? It’s not!
So many of our struggles stem from the root of fear. The emotion of fear bogs us down. The whispers of fear stop us short. The fears of failures cause us to give up before even starting. Yet the good news is we can do things differently. We can believe, try, and then succeed!
Any success comes from when we start with our hearts and minds first. The reason you’re spinning your wheels is you’re likely doing the same things over and over. Yes, they may seem safe, but they don’t work!
Today, my friend Dr. Magdalena Battles and I discuss time-saving tips to help you succeed, and we start our conversation with this question: “Are your decisions based on your personal values?”
Your Life, Your Priorities
Once we understand our personal values, we know what we want. We also have a motivation to take steps toward success, because these steps are birthed from deep in our hearts.
In my book Balanced, I encourage readers to list EVERYTHING they do in a week, and then to number their priorities between 1-4 … AND to delete the fours. Why? Because those fours are often based on fears. Fears of saying no. Fears of missing out. Fears of rejection. Fears of being left behind. Saying “no” actually frees us up to do more of the things we WANT to say yes to.
Today, my guest and I will do a deep dive as we talk through our values and choices. Questions Dr. Battles encourages us to answer are:
Where would you like to spend most of your time during the week?
What is most important to you?
What do you value most in the world?
From there, we talk about time-saving tips that really work. Why do they work? Because they’re based on our values.
Listen in. I know you’re going to enjoy this episode!
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Scripture to ponder
Better to have one handful with quietness than two handfuls with hard work and chasing the wind. Ecclesiastes 4:6
If you are enjoying the show, I have a quick favor to ask! If you haven’t yet hit the subscribe button and left a rating and a review on iTunes, please take a moment and do so! I love reading your reviews and it keeps the algorithms happy so new listeners can find the podcast as well!
Dr. Magdalena Battles has a Ph.D. in psychology, a master’s degree in professional counseling, and a Bachelor of Science degree in child psychology. Her post-graduate studies were completed at Harvard. She is a writer and conference speaker who specializes in parenting, child development, family relationships, domestic violence, and sexual assault. She shares her real-life experiences and professional insights on this website (Living Joy Daily) and on LifeHack.org, where she was named one of their top writers. She and her family enjoy camping in the RV and have visited 32 national parks so far. Magdalena is involved in her church and local community through Bible studies, book club, cheer coaching, and after-school programs. She and her husband reside in Texas where they are raising their three young children, a dog named Max, and a handful of silkie chickens. Hat obsessed, fascinator loving, and passionate about dressing nice without spending a fortune are some things you will find out about her on this blog. All of her blog postings are cross-posted in her very active Facebook group called Dr. Magdalena Battles; Living Joy Daily. Magdalena is the author of Let Them Play and 6 Hidden Behaviors that Destroy Families.
A few Sundays ago, I had a dilemma. We were a few minutes late for church, and we took a seat behind the children. In our church, pre-K through sixth-grade kids sit in the sanctuary during worship and then are released after worship to go to their children’s program. We were barely seated when one of the sixth-grade girls jumped from her seat and rushed to John. “Would you be our teacher today? Our teacher isn’t here.”
It turns out there was a miscommunication between the children’s director and the teacher, but that still meant someone was needed to help with the sixth-grade boys and girls. My husband was quick to respond and another woman was too. And I just sat there. I forced myself not to follow. Why?
I knew I could get up to help. I was physically and mentally able to come up with a lesson on the fly. But deep down I knew I couldn’t. I had three children under the age of six. I homeschool. I write and blog. I lead our teen mom support group. I didn’t have one ounce of “extra” in me to give.
It’s hard saying no. Really hard. The only easy way to do it is by understanding what we were called to say yes to.
In my book BalancedI encourage readers to narrow down their “life themes” to eight. Why eight? None of us are just about one thing . . . and eight is enough to manage, believe me!
What are your eight life themes?
My husband loves children’s church. It’s his passion, and he took a break from it when we adopted our two new kids, mostly because the adjustment was huge. If he were to create a list of his eight life themes, children’s church would be on that list.
Because I love John and enjoy children, I’ve supported him in this. Before adopting our new kids, I spent most Sundays working by his side, but in this season of life I just can’t do it. I need Sundays to get filled up so I can pour out the rest of the week.
Eight life themes are the things that come from the core of us. Yet during different seasons of life they may look different. These are my eight priorities in this season of life. These are the things I choose to say yes to:
Being a child of God
Being a wife
Being a mom. (Adoption is a huge part of this now, as is homeschooling.)
Mentoring teen moms
Writing books
Blogging/radio
Keeping a home
Staying healthy
It’s a big list. It’s enough. I also have a passion for leading mission trips, and a time may come when I start helping John in children’s ministry again. But now is not that time. And I’m OK with that. I know Jesus has created me for a purpose in THIS day. In THIS season.
How about you? If you’re like me there is a lot you CAN do. But what is God asking you to do in this season? What are your eight priorities?
Steps You can Take
Look at your life. Currently what are your eight priorities? Write them down.
Make a second list of things you need to say “no” to.
Start saying “no” to everything except your current priorities.
Daily Prayer
Dear Lord Jesus,
I thank you for all that you’ve given me. Lord, sometimes it seems too much. Help me to focus on the priorities that YOU have given me in this season. Also, Lord, help me to say “no” to other things, no matter how wonderful they seem.
Do you need balance in your homeschool? Pick up a copy of Homeschool Basics. Receive tried-and-true homeschool advice from veteran homeschooling moms Tricia Goyer and Kristi Clover. We dish out practical help on getting started and staying the course. Homeschool Basics will remind you that the best homeschooling starts with the heart. Packed with ideas to help you push aside your fears and raise kids who will grow to be life-long learners.
Kristi and I believe that homeschooling can transform your life, your home, and your family. Mostly, we believe homeschool can truly prepare your children for the life God’s called them to live.
Don’t let doubts hold you back any longer. Hope and refreshment await.
Find out more about Homeschool Basics and get your copy HERE.
Disclosure of Material Connection: Some of the links in the post above are “affiliate links.” This means if you click on the link and purchase the item, I will receive an affiliate commission. Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will add value to my readers. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”
“Reverence for God adds hours to each day.” Proverbs 10:27 (TLB)
At this moment, I’m preparing for a conference in South Africa, trying to stay on top of my writing, and I have TEN children, all in various stages of life. If I were to have an excuse not to take time to be with Jesus, this would be it. Staying up late every night until midnight, packing during the day and chasing kids around the house, you’d think I’d cherish every extra moment of sleep.
Yet my eyes still pop open in the morning. Not because I’m wide awake, but rather because my heart is hungry. I need Jesus. I need to read His Word and spend time with Him. After years of loving Jesus, my heart reveres Him. I stand in awe of what a difference spending time with Him makes in my life.
In Jesus’ arithmetic, “subtracting” time from our busy day multiplies the potential of every moment. Because of our time with Him we have a clearer vision, a more peaceful heart and a more joyful spirit. When I spend time with Jesus, I better discern what to spend my time on. My day seems to work better, and in the way Jesus works the hours of the day seem to multiply too.
This week is busy, yes, but when I spend time with my Lord I can make it through the day better than I anticipated I could.
Faith Step: Find at least two other times during the day to get away with Jesus. Think about times like the ten minutes when your biscuits are baking at dinnertime or the fifteen-minute break you have at work. Afterward, consider how that time focused on Jesus impacted the rest of your day.
Put the world on hold and step into the presence of Jesus, who gladly takes our burdens and stress and restores them with “the peace that surpasses understanding.”
This uplifting daily devotional book includes 366 short five-minute readings that help you rest and recharge your spirit by putting your focus on the Living God. Each page begins with a Scripture quote, followed by and uplifting devotion that demonstrates how Jesus’ life and teaching apply today. With humor, humility, and grace, the writers share insights that are easily relatable. A Faith Step is also included for you to practice throughout the day. The Faith Step will inspire and challenge you to apply the day’s message to your life.
For those who are seeking a deeper experience in their relationship with Christ, Mornings with Jesus 2016 offers a fresh perspective of who Jesus is and what that means for day-to-day life. As you focus on His truth, you will experience an abundance of blessings that spring from your ever-growing personal relationship with Him.
With a warm and friendly voice, 366 short devotional writings on the character and teachings of Jesus encourage you to greet each day by drawing near to Him and inviting His presence into your day. Spend time with Jesus at the beginning of each day and experience His nearness and peace in a new way throughout the year.
Disclosure of Material Connection: Some of the links in the post above are “affiliate links.” This means if you click on the link and purchase the item, I will receive an affiliate commission. Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will add value to my readers. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.” Read full privacy policy here.
You’re always on the go. Scrambling to find enough minutes in the day for everything you need to accomplish. When you’re feeling maxed out, it’s hard to live intentionally and set aside time for God. How do youmake time for what matters most?
I remember one Sunday I had a dilemma that taught me the importance of finding balance in my life. We were a few minutes late for church, and we took a seat behind the children. In our church, pre-K through sixth-grade kids sit in the sanctuary during worship and then are released after worship to go to their children’s program. We were barely seated when one of the sixth-grade girls jumped from her seat and rushed to John. “Would you be our teacher today? Our teacher isn’t here.”
It turns out there was a miscommunication between the children’s director and the teacher, but that still meant someone was needed to help with the sixth-grade boys and girls. My husband was quick to respond and another woman was too. And I just sat there. I forced myself not to follow. Why?
I knew I could get up to help. I was physically and mentally able to come up with a lesson on the fly. But deep down I knew I couldn’t. I homeschool. I write and blog. I lead our teen mom support group. I didn’t have one ounce of “extra” in me to give.
It’s hard saying no. Really hard. The only easy way to do it is by understanding what we were called to say yes to. Here are a few ways to pursue what really matters in life:
Make a list of your life themes
Life themes are the things that come from the core of us. Yet during different seasons of life they may look different. These are my eight priorities in this season of life. These are the things I choose to say yes to:
Being a child of God
Being a wife
Being a mom. (Adoption is a huge part of this now, as is homeschooling.)
Mentoring teen moms
Writing books
Blogging
Keeping a home
Staying healthy
Knowing what is most important in your life will make the next step easier: saying no.
Know when to say NO
My husband loves children’s church. It’s his passion, and he took a break from it when we adopted our new kids, mostly because the adjustment was huge. If he were to create a list of his eight life themes, children’s church would be on that list.
Because I love John and enjoy children, I’ve supported him in this. Before adopting our new kids, I spent most Sundays working by his side, but in this season of life I just can’t do it. I need Sundays to get filled up so I can pour out the rest of the week.
A time may come when I start helping John in children’s ministry again. But now is not that time. And I’m OK with that. I know Jesus has created me for a purpose in THIS day. In THIS season.
If someone asks you to do something that doesn’t fall under your life themes, take time to consider if you should commit. Know that it is okay to decline. Being picky with your commitments will give you the time, energy, and passion to fully invest in what matters most to you.
Surrender your control and plans to God
I’m a person who likes to handle things on my own. I take pride in doing a job well. I like to be organized and feel in control. Yet a busy schedule and kids is more that I can handle. I’m not always organized, and I’m rarely in control. I need God. Reminding myself of that and turning to Him changes everything.
I love marking things off my to-do list, but today I just sat down with my kids and played. We played blocks. We played toy animals, and I wondered why I don’t do this more often. “Being” a mom is more important than doing things around the house.
Utilize tools to simplify life
Technology can be a major distraction, but it also can be a HUGE blessing. We have apps for everything, so why not utilize your phone to make life a little easier? I use my phone to help me simplify everything from grocery shopping to banking. Here’s one app to download to your phone right now to help you save time for what really matters:
ECCU’s Mobile App helps you ditch busyness and pursue purpose. You can accomplish all your banking needs in just seconds so you can spend more time on what matters. Swap long lines at the bank for ECCU’s mobile app that lets you pay a person or a bill while you’re on the go, deposit a check, find an ATM and transfer money between accounts in just a few seconds.
ECCU financial products are designed to be compatible with Evangelicals’ faith-defined view of money. Its full-suite of checking, savings, investing and loan products help Christians serve as stewards of God’s resources.
ECCU is a full-service credit union designed for Christians. Their competitive checking, savings, investing and loan products help you do more with your money. So with every dollar you spend, you’re supporting ministry.
Most people already know the benefits of credit unions, such as customer ownership, fewer fees and higher savings rates. However, there is a segment of credit unions that continue to fly under the financial radar: Affinity-based banking—the intersection of faith and financial planning.
For most of its 50-year history, ECCU has been known for offering churches, Christian schools and other Evangelical nonprofits and ministries with specialized financial services. Now, ECCU also offers personal financial services:
—Personal savings account: a basic savings account for an emergency fund or savings for your kids that’s only $25 to open and has a 0.35% APY2 with no minimum balance.
—Money Market Savings account: a great opportunity to earn a higher rate (up to 0.95% APY2 on higher balances. This direct savings account—also called an online savings account—appeals to on-the-go consumers who prefer to be able to manage their lives online.
—Consumers can get these great rates because ECCU is largely an online bank.
*Thanks for ECCU for sponsoring this post. All opinions are my own. Thank you for supporting all Tricia Goyer collaborations and sponsors.
Disclosure of Material Connection: Some of the links in the post above are “affiliate links.” This means if you click on the link and purchase the item, I will receive an affiliate commission. Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will add value to my readers. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.” Read full privacy policy here.
When it comes to writing at home, serving in our church and community, and loving our family, we all strive for the same thing: balance. We believe it’s out there, and if we discover the right formula we’ll find it. And, when we find it, there we will have peace.
As a wife, mom of six (soon to be 10!), leader in a community support group, and full-time writer, radio host, and blogger I have the answer to the issue of “balance.” The answer is that balance is not possible . . . or at least not in the form of a perfect schedule or routine. For even if we find balance one day, it most likely will slip between your fingers the next. People have unique needs on a daily basis. Work schedules are dependent on others. Health wavers, moods change. Husbands have crises at work. The people we serve in the community have struggles often. Very often.
The only thing we can be certain of is that as soon as we achieve a small measure of balance something is going to overturn the applecart and all our good intentions will spill out like crabapples, becoming scattered and bruised.
The thing about balance is that the only one who can control tomorrow (or even the rest of today) is the One who can also provide for our moment-by-moment needs when our schedule gets out of whack. God not only knows what’s coming, but He also knows what we need to do today to prepare for it.
How do I balance my life?
I schedule a few key things:
Naps and bedtimes are a biggie for me. My little kids take a nap every day, at around the same time. And we strive to have them in bed by 7:30 p.m. We also try to have dinner as a family every night. Schedules give our children a sense of order. And when I know they’ll be in bed at a good hour, I can look forward to some element of peace in the evenings.
I pick two to three important things to get done in each day.
There are days I need to write 2,000 words. There are days I need to get caught up on laundry. These two things cannot happen on the same day. When I choose what to focus on some things, I’m also choosing what to ignore. This is important. There will never be enough time to do it all. Ever.
I set aside times for fun and play.
I give attention to my little ones first thing in the morning (instead of jumping straight onto the computer). I also try to spend an hour with them of dedicated time in the afternoons between the time they wake up from naps and the time I have to start working on dinner. We play in the yard, blow bubbles, or take a walk. When my kids know they’ll have dedicated time, they don’t have to fight for time (or act up to try to get it) throughout the day.
I seek help.
I’ve managed my workload so I can have a young mom come in four hours a week to clean. I have an assistant who helps with my blogs and other online help. I have a friend/nanny who watches my little ones for blocks of time so I can write. I was not at this place ten years ago, but I’ve worked to find people who I can help financially and who can help me. While you may not be at the place to hire someone, ask yourself if there is there someone who you can trade with. For years I traded homeschool days with another mom so I’d have a free day. Also, when you see someone who is seemingly “doing it all,” know that that person probably has help, too. No one can do it all and balance everything well. No one.
I turn to God.
He has the answers for your day. His Spirit will guide you to what’s most important. God has good plans for you and your family. Instead of looking to find the perfect schedule—the perfect balance—look to God for His plan for your day. Take your eyes off of that printed up schedule, and put them on Him, and you will go far into having a healthy and happy family and a productive work life, too!
How can a work-at-home mom raise kids, juggle a career and take care of family responsibilities with only 24-hour days? Working at home while raising kids and juggling a career and family responsibilities is no easy feat. Author and homeschooling mom Tricia Goyer shares her tips for finding balance among all your many hats as a mom. Balancing is a process and a journey, one that Tricia herself has yet to perfect. But between writing more than forty books, raising and homeschooling six kids, being a wife, and being active in her community, she has amassed valuable tips she shares in “Balanced.”
The book includes tips on:
—how to create focus themes for your family
—how to prioritize your schedule
—how to utilize your job so it also benefits your kids
—how to keep yourself out of the comparison game
—how to make working at home work for you
—and much more!
Disclosure of Material Connection: Some of the links in the post above are “affiliate links.” This means if you click on the link and purchase the item, I will receive an affiliate commission. Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will add value to my readers. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”
I wrote the book Balanced, yet I love how God is able to use my own words to help and inspire myself! As I’ve written blogs based on the book, it’s given me a chance to rethink some of the concepts. Every season of life is different, and I’m even in a new season since the nine months when I wrote the book! These are things I was reminded of—important thoughts that transformed my schedule.
1. Take time to ponder where you’re falling short.
On my current Fail! and Yeah! List I identified that while I was giving a lot of attention to my little kids, it was easy to ignore the older ones. It worked out that I was able to go on a road trip to Nashville, and my nineteen-year-old went with me. We chatted on the drive. We went to a concert, and we enjoyed being together! If I hadn’t stopped to ponder where I was falling short, I would have missed out on the memories I was able to make with Nathan. When I think about where I’m falling short, I can make plans to succeed.
2. Take time to build teamwork in your family.
I’d had been slacking on working with my children concerning chores. I knew it would be a lot of work. IT IS! Yet they are so excited to help and to be part of a team. If I hadn’t done this challenge I probably would have let my little kids slide for while longer (months? a year?). Yet when I was reminded of the importance of building a family team, I made creating a chore time schedule a priority. When I think in terms of “teamwork” it changes how I/we work around the home.
3. Take time to prioritize.
When my to-do list gets too full, it gets easy to want to give up. When I pick the “most important thing” and do that, it’s amazing what can get done. When I think about “what’s most important,” I understand my next steps.
4. Take time to praise.
I love God but so many times I forget to thank Him for ALL things. My husband is traveling this week, which means life is harder for this momma. Yet when I praise God for the kids, the mess, and even the weariness, I’m reminded that God sustains me. When I think about God, it makes it easier to ask Him for help throughout the day.
What about you? How do your thoughts transform your schedule?
Steps You can Take
Think about your thoughts. How do they change your attitude and actions? Take three minutes to journal about that. (Time yourself!)
Write down three steps you can take to get your thoughts moving in the right direction.
Thank God for the way He created our minds to work. Ask Him to guide your thoughts today, knowing they will transform your actions!
Daily Prayer
Dear Lord Jesus,
I know my thoughts are like the wind that moves the sail of my actions. When my thoughts blow in a positive direction, I steer in the right direction. Lord, help me control my thoughts today in a way that will positively impact my life and my family!
Disclosure of Material Connection: Some of the links in the post above are “affiliate links.” This means if you click on the link and purchase the item, I will receive an affiliate commission. Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will add value to my readers. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”
How to Find Time to Clean in the Random Moments of Your Day
I don’t have hours a day to clean . . . although since I have a college-aged son, a husband, a grandma, and three kids six-years-old and under at home, I wish I did!
Instead, I’ve developed the habit of using random minutes throughout the day to clean. Here’s what I’ve done in the last week:
Unloaded the dishwasher while waiting for my daughter’s bagel to toast.
Picked up three toys as I’m walking across the living room to call the kids down for dinner.
Sorted the rubber bands and bobby pins as I’m brushing my teeth.
Picked up all the empty water bottles and papers in my car as I’m grabbing my purse to go inside.
Sorted through mail as I’m browning the hamburger for tonight’s spaghetti.
Took dirty clothes from my bathroom to the laundry room on the way to make my morning coffee.
Folded laundry when I’m on a business call.
Swept the floor as I helped my daughter with her homework.
It’s amazing how these little things add up! And when I see a straightened pantry (done while I was waiting for pasta to boil) it makes me want to tackle the crumbs on the counters. It’s amazing how the little things add up!
How about you? How do you use those random minutes throughout the day to clean?
Looking for more ways to find balance in your life? Get a copy of my book, Balanced, today for FREE!
Today’s Prayer
Dear Lord, thank you for the random moments throughout my day. Help me to make the most of them and to recognize them for what they are: little blessings.
Disclosure of Material Connection: Some of the links in the post above are “affiliate links.” This means if you click on the link and purchase the item, I will receive an affiliate commission. Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will add value to my readers. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”
I used to be the worst at saying no. If someone needed help at church, or a babysitter, or a work-project to get done, I was the person whom they could count on. I prided myself for being able to accomplish more than anyone I knew, but the cost was great. I was stressed. I was overwhelmed. I was tired all the time. And my shoulders grew weary from the high level of expectations. Especially mine. My husband, John, was the one who taught me to say no. After one ultra-busy season he sat me down and forced me to go over my schedule. Together we asked these questions in order to pare down our calendar:
Take a few minutes and answer these questions. You might want to start with the last one first. What do you miss out on when you forget to say no? One of the most important things is inner renewal.
Dear God,
I am stretched so thin. I barely have time for any of the things I’ve committed to. I need your help. Give me discernment in what to keep in my schedule and what to get rid of. May I have the strength to say ‘no’ to people when I know I cannot take on another task. May I focus on the activities that are most important and do well at them. Thank you for your guidance and support! May my life and choices glorify your name.
Disclosure of Material Connection: Some of the links in the post above are “affiliate links.” This means if you click on the link and purchase the item, I will receive an affiliate commission. Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will add value to my readers. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”
I love the television show Clean Sweep. In the show the contents of a whole room are placed into a person’s driveway, and their things are sorted into piles: Keep, Maybe Keep, and Toss. One of the aspects I love about the show is the way junk is fretted over. Seriously, do you really want to keep those mismatched potholders, that torn and stained rug, or that Duran Duran cassette from 1987? If you have to ask, “What is this?” “Where does it go?” or “What does it do?” perhaps it should betossed.
The truth is, maybe we need to look at our lives and schedule the same way we look at the clutter around our house in little piles or big stacks.
Do you have things cluttering your mind, heart, or time that need to be cleaned out?
I remember one day when my husband encouraged me to do a clean sweep. A busy mom of two toddlers and one school-aged child, I was overwhelmed and exhausted by life. John could see it was taking a toll on me. When he asked me about my day, I muttered and moaned. I had a great husband, a budding career, and good kids . . . so why was I so frustrated? Because I was doing too many “important” things and I was exhausted.
John asked me to sit down with my schedule and list everything I was doing. It was a long list! I wrote down cleaning, caring for kids, cooking, schooling, dance class, sports activities, gardening, Bible study and writing—just to name a few. Then John asked me to use my common sense: “Is this something you love? Something you feel called to?”
As I went over my schedule I realized everything, everything, ranked as a priority. I had given it all equal weight. The things I didn’t like took up just as much time as the things I found joy in . . . and soon the joy had become lost in the clutter.
What things was I doing because I couldn’t say no?
What things had worked for a season but no longer worked for our family?
What things could I hand off to someone else?
As I thought about my needs—and my kids’ needs—as I listened to my heart and my gut, I started making better decisions. Before I took on new responsibilities I considered whom I was most responsible for—my kids. My common sense grew, and I learned to think through why I wanted to do something and where it would fit. Once I started cutting things, I discovered I really cared about the things that were left!
Are you a work-at-home mom raising kids, juggling a career and taking care of family responsibilities with only 24-hour days? Working at home while raising kids and juggling a career and family responsibilities is no easy feat. That’s why I wrote Balanced: Finding Center as a Work-at-Home Mom. Balancing is a process and a journey, one that I have yet to perfect. But between writing more than forty books, raising and homeschooling six kids, being a wife, and being active in my community, I have amassed valuable tips that I shared in Balanced.
Download this FREE printable from Balanced to help you figure out what needs cutting in your calendar.
Disclosure of Material Connection: Some of the links in the post above are “affiliate links.” This means if you click on the link and purchase the item, I will receive an affiliate commission. Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will add value to my readers. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”
Do you break out in hives just thinking about the craziness and chaos that comes with Christmas? It doesn’t have to be that way. Inspirational authors Cara Putman, Sarah Sundin, and Tricia Goyer share about Christmas’ past in their new novella collection Where Treetops Glisten. Their three stories “White Christmas,” “I’ll Be Home for Christmas,” and “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas” will take you back to war-time 1942, 1943, and 1944. The authors have also teamed up to give tips on simplifying Christmas this year! Join us December 1-6 on Not Quite Amish Living for the Simplifying Christmas series.
“The greatest step towards a life of simplicity is to learn to let go.” ― Steve Maraboli, Life, the Truth, and Being Free
Have you ever felt that way about the last six weeks of the year? You wake up one morning and it’s November 20th. Blink and it’s January 2. Weeks have passed and you’d had such high hopes for a season filled with peace.
Instead, the weeks are filled with events, rehearsals, recitals, parties, and more. Christmas has become a time of immense busyness. Instead of being a season of peace and enjoyment, many of us see December approach on the calendar with a sense of dread. Do you hate that as much as I do? Do you long for an approach to the season that doesn’t make you cringe?
When I asked some friends how they simplify Christmas, many talked about schedules.
Today, I wanted to share some of their ideas with you. I’d also love to hear your suggestions. Together maybe we can bring some sanity back to the holidays.
I just simplify Christmas by doing quiet things. Just sitting under the tree, with the lights glowing, listening to “O Holy Night” and reading the story from Luke 2. Maybe eating a cookie or two as well. I think just being still and being quiet and remembering that night so long ago is the best thing to do to get away from the craziness of the season. —Kendra Whittle
I think I’ve simplified Christmas by not getting too many things scheduled. In years past, I get so busy with so many great things to do, that I forget/don’t have time to just stop and celebrate and savor the season. Then suddenly, it’s January and I realize that I never took the time to really enjoy what is such a special time of the year. I’ve learned to downsize my schedule. —Brittany Keating
We simplify Christmas by celebrating with my side of the family on Labor Day Weekend. There are no flu bugs to bother with. We can camp outside since we have grown a lot and need the space. We can act out the Christmas story outside with a campfire and various locations to walk to. We love it. —Randy Wigdahl
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