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How Prayer Changes the Future for Adoption

 

How Prayer Changes the Future for Adoption
How Prayer Changes the Future for Adoption

How Prayer Changes the Future for Adoption

I’d like to think I’m an expert pray-er. I can clearly see how my prayers changed things. For example, I’ve had seven kids—not birthed from me—running around my house who are examples of that. Yet, the way that my prayers changed the future is different than you think.

God is not a genie in a bottle.

My prayers weren’t effective because I figured out the right words to make God do what I wanted to do. I used to think that. As a young Christian, I’d try all sorts of things:

  • praying in the morning
  • praying at night
  • praying on my knees
  • praying out loud
  • journaling my prayers

I wouldn’t admit it out loud, but I believed deep down if I said the right things, at the right time, in the right way, that God could be swayed.

What I’ve since discovered is God has good plans for my life. He has hopes for me and a future.

The number-one thing that changes when I pray . . . is me.

Prayer opens up the connection between me and God. Prayer softens my heart to His will.

My prayers change the future because as I connect with Him, I’m willing to submit my will to His. As I submit and walk in His ways . . . my future is different than the path I would have taken myself on in my own according. And the future is changed.

Prayer changes the future because:

  1. I connect with God.
  2. I submit my will to His.
  3. I walk in His ways—not the ones I try to figure out.

I have dozens of examples of this, but I’ll quickly share one: adoption. Around 2000, I started praying for God to give me His heart. Soon I became interested in adopting. God tells us so many times to care for the widows and orphans.

My husband wasn’t on board, so I continued to pray (not nag). In 2007, John brought up the idea to me (yes!), and we filled out paperwork to adopt from China.

By the time we submitted our paperwork in 2008, the adoption Chinese program changed drastically, and the opportunity to adopt a healthy baby girl was no longer an option. By 2009, when I discovered I’d not have a Chinese baby anytime soon (or ever), I was crushed. I cried (I’ll admit it), but I also prayed for God’s will.

“Lord, give us the child YOU desire. I know you placed adoption on my heart for a reason.”

I’m telling the complete truth when I say that the very day I relinquished my will, I received a phone call about a birth mom looking for a home for her baby. March 2010, Alyssa joined our family—a nine-pound bundle of joy.

Even after bringing Alyssa home, I continued to pray for God’s will. (Lord, are there more children that you have for us?)

In 2012 Bella and Casey joined our home from the foster care system. Later on, God placed Lauren, Jordan, Maria, and Florentina into our lives. I love my children! I couldn’t imagine life without them. More than that, I know God placed adoption on my heart for a reason; it just didn’t look the way I thought.

Prayer changed the future because:

  1. I connected with God, and I discovered His heart.
  2. I submitted my will to His, and I relinquished myself to His path.
  3. I walked in His ways, . . . and He led me where I never expected.

Today, consider changing your future forever.

God has good plans for your life. He knows you’ll only be willing to step out into the future when your heart is changed through prayer.

How Prayer Changes the Future for Adoption

As you submit yourself to His heart and His will, expect to walk down paths different than you ever expected. You’ll learn how prayer changes the future for adoption. Also, expect to have a partner in the journey. God—yes, the God of the universe!—will be stepping out in front of you along the way and leading you in His plans.

As we continued to pray God continued to lead. Today, we have ten beautiful children. We are so blessed. And it all began when we let God changed our future through prayer.

The Adoption Summit is a great opportunity for you to take the next step and learn more about adoption. And right now you can get a FREE ticket here: www.adoptionsummit.com

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Disclosure of Material Connection: Some of the links in the post above are “affiliate links.” This means if you click on the link and purchase the item, I will receive an affiliate commission. Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will add value to my readers. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”

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How to Walk Out Your Healing

The way you walk out your healing can affect not just your own life, but also the lives of your children. Facing our past mistakes and finding forgiveness and healing in Christ is so important. Today, I share I found healing through walking out my faith and how that affected our family.

How To Walk Out Your Healing
How To Walk Out Your Healing

 

Walk Out Your Healing

When my daughter was 13, I called her “mini-me.” When she answered the phone, people often thought it was me. Leslie has the same tone as me, and her voice carries the same inflections. Even though she had her own collection of CDs, she would often rifle through mine because she liked that music, too. She learned to put on makeup by watching me, and when she would see me engrossed in a good book, she would naturally want to read it. Even now that she is a grown adult, I see so much of myself in my daughter. She has many of my same convictions… And also some of my hang-ups.

When our kids are toddlers, we think it’s so sweet when they pick up a block and place it to their ear like a cell phone. But the older they get, the more they’re mimicking matters, and if they aren’t dealt with, the rock-solid bad habits in your life will most likely be theirs, too.

 

Walk Out Your Healing

In those days when you were slaves of sin, you weren’t concerned with doing what was right. And what was the result? It was not good, since now you’re ashamed of the things you used to do, things that end in eternal doom. But now you are free from the power of sin and have become slaves of God. Now you do those things that lead to holiness and result in eternal life.

Romans 6:20-22 NLT

What I love about that scripture is the fact that Paul isn’t trying to play down the past. Instead, he reminds fellow believers that what matters is what we are now free from the power of sin and slaves of God.

The word free here means “to liberate,” and this word has special meaning to me personally. Several years ago I wrote my first novel, From Dust and Ashes. It’s about liberation from a Nazi concentration camp from the points of view of both an American G.I. who opens the camp gates and a prisoner inside. To write the book, I interviewed both veterans and survivors alike. I also attended a ceremony in Austria organized by the survivors to celebrate their liberation 60 years after the fact!

Author Tricia Goyer shares the captivating story behind her book From Dust and Ashes

Walking In Freedom

These men and women — prisoners of the Nazis – had been near death, oppressed, and hopeless. Yet their victors came to open the gates and offered them not only hope but a future too. Once they walked from those gates, they were prisoners no more. They were liberated. They might revisit those times of bondage in their mind, but they no longer had to live behind the barbed wire. They did, however, have to realize their freedom and live in it, no longer behaving as if they were still in bondage. Likewise, if we don’t know the joy of true freedom in our hearts, how do we expect to lead our kids in the same freedom?

Kids go where we take them, they have no choice. How sad it would be if our own inner struggles pulled our kids back to our own past issues… Merely because we ourselves have not yet fully realized our freedom in Christ.

Walk Out Your Healing

It’s taken me years to deal with some of the issues from my past. I’ve attended Bible studies for women who’ve had abortions. I helped start a crisis pregnancy center in our community. I’ve spoken at purity retreats for young women. And I’ve mentored teen moms. For me, healing from my past involves helping others who face the same struggles. My heart is renewed when I help others find hope.

The additional benefit is that my children now have a mother who has wholeness in Christ. They’ve heard about my mistakes, and they’ve seen me reaching out. They’ve also gained conviction in these areas, following what I say . . . and what I do.

Now, it’s your turn. How have you walked out healing in your life? What has God done to liberate you from your past? Share your testimony with me in the comments!

Walk It Out

Tricia Goyer Walk it OutYou’ve heard the phrase Trust God. It’s easy to say but can be hard to do. But what if you did it. What if you did the things that God asked you to do and solely relied on Him? Women often pack their lives with family, friends, and faithful service, yet still feel empty and unfilled. Bestselling author Tricia Goyer has been where you are. She gets it and knows that the only way to live a fulfilling life is to walk it out with God.

Walk It Out: The Radical Result of Living God’s Word One Step at a Time is a resource that teaches women how walking out the mandates of Scripture will allow God to spark passion and mission within them. Goyer teaches women, of all ages, how to:

    1. Use your healed heart to love and serve
  2. Create space and craft purpose
  3. Give generously without question
  4. Be vulnerable
  5. Truly love your family
  6. Do the work that God has given you to do

 

This book is for women:

  • struggling with anxiety or depression
  • feeling like they lost their way and are living by comparison
  • who feel like they’re never enough and always too much
  • searching for ways to develop a closer relationship with God
  • raising families while facing crossroads

Sometimes the steps we take in our faith are easy, but many times they require a move outside of what feels safe or secure. When women stop focusing on their own dreams and purposes, and instead focus on God’s dreams and purposes, everything changes. Get your copy of Walk It Out today!

 

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My Review of the Movie Redeeming Love

Today I’m sharing my review of the movie Redeeming Love. Like many others, I’ve been anxiously awaiting the transition from book to movie. With such an important message it’s no wonder the movie is drawing lots of commentary. Let’s talk about the movie and how it might be a great retelling of a timely message from God to His people.

my review of the movie redeeming love

My Review of the Movie Redeeming Love

I saw Redeeming Love last night. I’ve previously read the novel by Francine Rivers. And, reading through the Bible 7-8 times, I’ve read the book Hosea numerous times, too.
For those who aren’t familiar with the biblical narrative, Hosea is a prophet of God who is asked to physically portray a message of repentance to a woman named Gomer. The name Hosea means “salvation,” and his life was a prophecy to the nation of Israel. Hosea’s wife was a prostitute who continued to return to her sin. Yet even then, Hosea would go to her and “redeem” her, repurchasing her from the darkness she had surrendered herself to.

Hosea’s life was a prophecy to the people of Israel, a statement that although God will bring judgment to sin, He will also always bring His people back to Himself through His love. The cycle of repentance, redemption, and restoration is evident in this story.

In 1991, my friend Francine Rivers published a book that follows this storyline. Although I started it many times, I only finished it last year because it’s a brutal story. In it, Angel is sold into prostitution as a child, and as an adult, she’s tried to escape, but she finds herself right back where she started: in prostitution.
Through the pain, Angel has lost her soul. There is no hope for a future until a man named Michael Hosea comes and tells her that God told him to take Angel as his wife.
I will not go into all the details, but this story is HARD and heartbreaking. With the tenderness of Christ, Michael loves Angel, yet she rejects him again and again.
Seeing Michael’s heartbreak is difficult. I wanted to shout, “Just accept his love! Why won’t you accept his love?” And that is when it hit me. This is Christ and me. So many times, I’ve tried to do things my way, yet Jesus is right there just wanting me to accept the love He has for me. THIS is what made me cry when I watched Redeeming Love. I saw Christ’s love displayed for me so clearly. But I’m getting ahead of myself …

My Review of the Movie Redeeming Love

I want to go back and say that I’ve known about this movie for the last four years or so. (Maybe longer.) You see, Frani is a good friend of mine. Over the previous eighteen years, we’ve both been part of a group of writers who have gotten together every summer to Plot, Pray, and Play. So I’ve prayed for this movie for many years, and I honestly think it turned out amazingly beautiful. Hard, yes, but amazingly beautiful. There isn’t one scene I would change. I know the purpose of every scene and why it’s essential to the story.
More than that, I know Frani is a woman of Scripture and prayer. On days when we were playing and plotting, Frani often sat pouring over Scripture at the dining room table. When she writes about a topic in fiction, Frani wants to know every place God speaks on that topic before writing one word. And you know what? God displayed what He had to say about redemption through the real-life story of Hosea marrying a prostitute.

When it comes to people speaking against this movie, their main concern is the sexual content, and I want to address that. (Let me remind you, this story is about a prostitute!)

First, the sexual scenes that hint at Angel’s abuse are AWFUL. Like my husband John told me, “No one should call those scenes pornography or worry they’ll bring arousal. Instead, what they bring is complete heartbreak.” Enough abuse is shown that Angel’s pain is clear, and it’s not pretty.
Second, there are scenes of married love–these are the hot and passionate ones. And do you know why they are essential to this story? Because as someone who was used and abused, sex was not a gift for Angel to give or receive until she allowed herself to love and be loved. When Michael and Angel, man and wife (finally!) come together, that’s how it’s displayed: as a beautiful gift. As healing. As hope.
Now you may say, “Well, that shouldn’t be shown in a movie.” My response is, “Okay, then close your eyes if you don’t want to see it.”
Actually, I had to go to the bathroom, and I missed the big sex scene. That works, too! (It’s funny how the timing worked out. I just really had to go.)
Yet when I asked my husband John about it later, he had something insightful to say,

“To deny the positive sexual experience is to accept the negative.”

Is that profound or what?
As horrible as sexual abuse is, married love and sex are beautiful. The fact that someone can find healing after such abuse is a true miracle. And that’s the whole point of this story: redemption.

True love, God’s love, can bring healing to the darkest of places.

Now, if you choose not to see Redeeming Love, that’s fine. It’s your choice. But I want you to know the heart behind this movie and this story. So then, if you choose to watch, you’ll see Francine’s heart. But more importantly, you’ll see God’s heart. No matter what you’ve done or how you’ve hurt Him, God’s love is faithful, and He longs to redeem you and make you His own. Now that’s a beautiful story.

-Tricia Goyer
Here is the trailer that might help you decide:

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14 Ways You Can Help Teen Moms

There are certainly more than 14 Ways to Help Teen Moms, but this a great start. Young moms have a lot of needs. They’re still teenagers, yet they also have to balance school, a boyfriend, friends, parents, and sometimes work. Some of the ways to help teen moms may seem small, but to a teen mom, they could make all the difference. I know–I was that teen mom.

14 ways to help teen moms

 

14 Ways You Can Help Teen Moms

As a teen mom, I faced depression when I lost my boyfriend and most of my friends during my pregnancy. I dropped out of school and slept until noon. With each day that passed I put another brick in the wall I was building around my heart. Those bricks started tumbling when older women reached out to me with love and compassion. Because they loved me, I dared to believe God loved me too. Sometimes I wonder where I’d be today without those women.

If you’d like to help teen moms, here are some valuable ways to do it. You may never know the impact, but I guarantee it’ll be huge!

1. Offer a prepaid phone.

“I offered a young mom a prepaid phone so she can always call for help when needed. I also paid/ordered cab rides for her to go to the doctor or ER when necessary. Apps such as Uber or Lyftt make it possible to help long-distance. I wasn’t even in the same state, but we were able to help in this manner.” —Angela

2. Take her shopping.

“I had the pleasure years ago to take a young mom maternity clothes shopping. This trip experience was the first for us both but such a precious memory.” —Sherry

3. Help with homework.

Offer to help with college applications. Search for scholarships, too.

14 ways to help teen moms

4. Share your life–be a true friend.

“I welcomed her into my home with hugs, stood by her choice to have her baby, was her friend, prayed for her, and held a shower for her.” —Mary Elizabeth

5. Offer to babysit for a season.

“I babysat for a young girl so she could go back to college. She was valedictorian at her high school graduation and got a full-ride scholarship to our state university. She found out she was pregnant just before graduation. It was the middle of her second semester and first year of college when she gave birth. She had nobody to help, so I babysat so she could go back to class literally one week after she had him.” —Trisha

6. Host a baby shower for her or collect almost-new items from your friends.

Many young moms are unable to purchase items themselves. “I encouraged my local Republican Woman’s Club members to put on a shower for her. They went all out, and it was very nice!” —Heidi

7. Take her to lunch and talk about her baby.

Even if a pregnancy is unexpected and unplanned, there is still a child to celebrate. Ask her if she has any questions about pregnancy or parenting you can answer.

8. Talk to her about relationships.

Let her know you won’t be shocked by her questions. Many young women find themselves in unhealthy relationships and don’t have anyone to talk to them about it. Give her supportive, loving advice.

9. Offer to do a Bible study with her, or invite her to a Bible study with your friends.

14 ways to help teen moms

Many young moms have questions about the Bible, but they’ve never had anyone to ask. “I bought her a Bible to read during her lonely hours.” —Martha

Because many teens have smartphones (and spend lots of time on them) show her how to download the YouVersion Bible app. It’s free and means she will always have the Word of God available to her no matter where she is–in doctor’s appointments, school, or late nights with a new baby. It even has several free Bible studies she can do alone or with a group.

10. Host a birthday party.

“I gave her a gift at her daughter’s first birthday party (including a fantastic book for teen moms). The gift also had ‘pampering’ stuff for her—bubble bath, that kind of thing.” —Jodi

11. Gather the troops to help teen moms.

“I found thirty people to give $100 to a teen mom at church so she could get a car. A guy from church who was a mechanic tuned it up and got it in tip-top shape.” —Carmen

12. Buy her some inspiring books.

I wrote Praying for Your  Future Husband and Teen Mom: You are Stronger Than You Think with teen moms in mind. Read through them with her and give her a chance to share her thoughts and feelings.

14 Ways to Help Teen Moms

13. Be there for support.

“I watched her son, drove her to and from work, fed her (both with our family and sent food home), purchased formula and diapers, took photos of her and her son to send to family, and invited her to church.” —Kimberly

14. Be a friend.

“I was her friend when no one else was.” —Nicole

14 ways to help teen moms

14 Ways You Can Help Teen Moms

These fourteen ways are just a start. Consider how God can use you to help a young mom in your life. The value for her and her child is immeasurable.

Download this free resource as a reminder of how you can make a difference to a teen mom!

I hope this encourages you to help a teen mom in your city, church, or family.  They need us!

Warmly, Tricia

Other Blog Posts I’ve Written About Teen Moms

Teen Mom, You Are Not Alone

Gaining Wisdom by Working with Teen Moms

A Letter to Teen Moms | You Are Important

Broken Things Made Beautiful

Word Identity | Your Words Change Everything!

Share “Teen Mom” with Someone Today!

5 Practical Ways to Run a Teen MOPS Group

Somebody Needs to Hear

17 Ways to Reach out to Single Moms

Why Does Mentoring Matter? A Lesson From Mary

Just Be Available to God

God Is Not Punishing You For Your Past Sins

An Unexpected Life

How to Start a Teen MOPS Group

How to Help Teen Moms

 

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2020 is Just a Chapter of Our Stories | Bonnie Clark

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2020 is Just a Chapter of Our Stories. But with perseverance, we can lean into what God has for us in this season and not survive–but thrive. Today our guest Bonnie Clark shares how God is moving in her through the challenges of this year.

2020 is Just a Chapter of Our Stories

 

2020 has been a strange chapter in history for sure. The changes—some possibly permanent, the missed opportunities, our uncertain future. We’re all struggling in different ways. It seems unreal what is happening in our communities, and country and in our small world.

It’s like we’re living in a movie.

But even in the middle of this crazy year, I know deep in my heart that this is all part of our story. It’s part of my story because I am on this earth “for such a time as this” and recently, although I feel like they have missed out on so much, I’ve realized that 2020 is also a part of my children’s story too.

The writer in me has always loved a good story, and one that has always fascinated me is the story of the Titanic: The tale seems unreal. The ship was “unsinkable” and yet it went down in just a few short hours after hitting an iceberg in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean taking many lives with it to the bottom of the sea. The whole thing was like a bad dream that had come true.

But for me, what draws me in and still fascinates me to this day, are the incredible true stories within the story, of the people who were on the ship.

There were men who courageously and chivalrously ushered “women and children first” to safety.

There were men who cowardly dressed as women to get access to the lifeboats.

Wives chose to die with their husbands rather than be separated from them.

Musicians played to calm the crowd and then the music faded with their lives.

And there was a captain who valiantly went down with his ship.

Each person, through their individual choices, became a character in the story that we still tell today. There were victims and villains and victors.

AND HERE WE ARE.

The reality of Covid-19 on the world will one day be a story that we tell.

I’m not suggesting that this ship is going to sink. I’m quite hopeful that Covid-19 will go away, but the stories we tell about it will live on forever. What part are you playing in the story? What character and role have you assumed without even realizing it? Are you modeling courage and perseverance for your children?

“All the world’s a stage, and all the men and women merely players.”- Shakespeare

2020 is just a chapter of our stories and the mission for a Jesus follower has not changed. It’s only become amplified. We are called to be a part of the story and to point people to the Storyteller.

Character is revealed in times of trial. So, who do you want to be? Who are you becoming during the Covid-19 pandemic of 2020? What will be your story?

I want to be the Unsinkable Molly Brown. Who according to many accounts urged the rowers in her lifeboat to go back and rescue more people who were drowning in the dark sea. I want to be fearless with my words and actions. I want to try to help others from going under.

Buildings may be closed, but now we get to be the real church. We can show the world that “we are hard-pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair.”

We can live with a spirit of peace and not fear.

Schools look different for our kids, but THIS is real school. We can teach our children to love and be kind to EVERYONE especially those who think, act, or look different from you. We can learn to taste our words and bring life and encouragement to those who are really struggling. Let’s allow kind words to be nourishment and compassion be our teachers in this shared human experience.

Kind words are like honey, sweet to the soul and healthy for the body. – Proverbs 16:24

 

2020 is Just a Chapter of Our Stories

We won’t all come out of this unscathed, but we can move forward with a deeper sense of awareness, gratitude, and faith. Heroic. That is the story I want to tell. I will not be pulled under by fear. I will create a story with my children that is worth telling. One of trust and truth and unsinkable faith.

The Storyteller invites us into the unfolding story of history. Let’s choose our part well, for ourselves and our children.

“Today I have given you the choice between life and death, between blessings and curses. Now I call on heaven and earth to witness the choice you make. Oh, that you would choose life so that you and your descendants might live!” – Deuteronomy 30:19

 

Bonnie Clark loves books that make her laugh, cry, or think for a long time. She has always enjoyed words and writing, but she has a special affection for picture books. Weekly trips to the library with her kids is one of her favorite things to do, and even though her older two are on to chapter books, they still enjoy listening to mom read a picture book.

When Clark isn’t writing and raising her kids, she does yoga, reads books, and drinks lots of coffee. Her favorite place in the world is ANY beach. She lives in Canton, Georgia, with her husband and their three children.

Learn more at bonnieclarkbooks.com or follow her on Facebook (Bonnie Clark Author), Twitter (@bonclark), Instagram (@bonnieclarkbooks), and YouTube (Bonnie Clark Books). 

More about Taste Your Words:

Teach kids about the power of words and the importance of kindness with this charming picture book that cleverly illustrates why we should think before we speak.

Amera’s having a bad day. Her best friend ruined her cupcake and they both said mean things. When Amera brings her bad mood home with her, her mom tells her to “taste her words.” Amera’s mean words taste like rotten eggs, spoiled milk, and lemons! As Amera realizes that her mean words make her feel bad and others feel worse, she starts saying the kindest, sweetest words she can find.

This picture book is an excellent resource for parents who want to teach their kids to think before they speak. With humorous text and lively illustrations, Clark and Bright make it easy for even the youngest children to understand the power of their words.

Purchase a copy of Taste Your Words here!

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The Top Ten Walk It Out Podcast Episodes

Here are the Top Ten Walk It Out Podcast Episodes. It’s been such a blessing to connect and share these voices and stories with you friends. Enjoy!

Top Ten Walk It Out Podcast Episodes

 

The Top Ten Walk It Out Podcast Episodes

 

1. Brooke Tilghman Wife to Todd, Mom of 8, Pastor’s Wife, Mrs. Voice … Loves a Good Thrift

Top Ten Walk It Out Podcast Episodes

We all see the goodness of God in many ways. For my new friend, Brooke Tilghman, she’s recently seen the goodness of God in an over-the-top way. Wife to Todd, mom of 8, and pastor’s wife … last fall Brooke encouraged her husband Todd to go to an open audition for The Voice. And just last week, Todd Tilghman was crowned the winner of the popular singing show…https://triciagoyer.com/104

2. Rachel Swanson The Unexpected Journey of Purpose

I’ll be talking with my friend, Rachel Swanson, author of the new book, Refine and Restore: Revive Your Heart, Release Your Purpose. We’ll be talking about her book and also how God took her on an unexpected journey. He gave her this desire to write, but it has turned out far differently than she ever imagined. Including her first book, Big and Little Coloring Devotional that ended up hitting the bestsellers list! I just love how God has a plan for us, we just need to take those steps. Even though the steps don’t always lead where we want them too or where we think they need to go, God will refine and restore us along the path. https://triciagoyer.com/084

3. Walking Out Hope for the Congo with Diana Waring

Friend, you’re not going to believe this story. When Diana Waring reached out to me I KNEW I had to have her as a guest on my show. We bumped up this episode because EACH OF US can make a difference. There is a people group who is facing genocide. Your prayers can change everything! …https://triciagoyer.com/117

4. Susan Merrill Connect with your Kids through Journaling

How well do your kids know you? I’m not talking about knowing which kind of coffee creamer you like (which my kids know which kind of creamer I like in my coffee). They may know what it means when you slip on jeans and put on make-up instead of your normal sweatpants. I’m talking about something deeper. I think sometimes it’s really hard to let our kids know our hearts—what’s going on inside and what really matters…https://triciagoyer.com/walkitout-podcast-083-susan-merrill/

5. Amanda Bacon & Anne-Renee Gumley Shiny Things: Mothering on Purpose in a World of Distractions.

Not only do we have social media distractions, but we also have distractions of trying to keep up our house, making ourselves look good, making sure we’re doing what other moms around us are doing. I think so many times we’re missing out on what is important in our families. I’ve been a mom for over thirty years and in that time I’ve learned the things that are important, as well as those things that are not important. Today we’re going to be talking about the things that are important and the things that we need to be focusing on…https://triciagoyer.com/082

The Top Ten Walk It Out Podcast Episodes

6. Renewing of the Mind with Barb Raveling

While she’s been a Christian for over forty-six years, it was only recently that Barb Raveling began to gain control over her thoughts and renewing her mind. She’s authored books such as Renewing of the Mind Project and I Deserve a Donut. What I love most about Barb is when she decided to write a truth journal to make decisions and to really turn those lies she was telling herself into truths and focusing on God he life began to change. https://triciagoyer.com/067

7. Gather Ministries with Jennifer Camp

As you will see in Jennifer’s journey, this is nothing she ever planned. This is nothing she aspired to. Sharing all that God was doing in her and through her it really was that step of faith to trust that God was calling her to this. I know that you’re going to love this conversation because I loved it…https://triciagoyer.com/walkitout-podcast-070-jennifer-camp/

8. Sheila Walsh A Life of Prayer

Many know the name Sheila Walsh, and we’ve all been blessed through her Bible teachings and heart-hitting lesson, but the beautiful messages we are drawn to come from a place of brokenness. And in that brokenness, Sheila found comfort and strength through prayer. As we chatted, Sheila shared the misconceptions she had about prayer and her battle with depression that she calls, “a dark winter to the soul.” Sheila relates from the heart of someone who has faced dark pain, and yet still turns to God … even if it’s just with the simple whisper of, “Jesus.”…https://triciagoyer.com/088

9. Sharon Jaynes The Power of a Woman’s Words

All of us can think back to our childhood and the words that built us up or tore us down. How did others’ words impact you? Personally, the words spoken to me told me that I could “do better.” Yes, a B is fine … but why wasn’t it an A? And I’ve struggled with that all my life … always trying to “do better, do more.”… https://triciagoyer.com/122

10. Stand All the Way Up with Sophie Hudson

I loved talking about Stand All the Way Up with Sophie Hudson on this week's episode of Walk it Out. I know you are going to enjoy this episode!

I used to be someone who hated confrontation. Arguing was uncomfortable, and I worried stating my mind would make people mad. And then I became a mom of kids who needed me to fight FOR them. To go against labels and to find solutions. To not let people give me a “no” when my kids needed a “yes.” I’ve learned through the years it was good to be strong and to stand up for those without a voice. I started looking around and paying attention. I started calling out injustice … even if it made me uncomfortable because what may be my “uncomfortable” might be completely life-changing for someone else. And that’s what this episode is all about. This truly has been a year of HARD changes, and we can either wallow in self-pity or we can look around to see what others are facing. When we stand up, pay attention, and reach out … we often find that all the things we were concerned about don’t often see as big in the end. I know you’ll love laughing along with me and Sophie, even as we tackle tough topics… https://triciagoyer.com/126

 

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The Top Ten Walk It Out Podcast Episodes

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Be a Voice for Change {In Honor of Martin Luther King Jr.}

Be a voice for change

Be a Voice for Change

We are facing an all-time high of strained race relations in our culture. Even with all that was accomplished by Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. over sixty years ago, we are still fighting a disease of racism.

Maybe, you know there is a problem, but you don’t know what to do to help. You want to be a voice for change, but you aren’t sure you have that power.

Let me assure you, friend, you DO!

There are many ways you can build friendships and connect with others across ethnic and cultural lines. Here are seven ways you can be the answer to the race problem, taken from my book Walk It Out.

  1. Ask God to change your heart. Pray and ask that He helps you see the joy of unity and diversity in relationships. Ask Him to help you notice.
  2. Get to know your neighbors. My neighbor Tracey is much better at this than I am. She owns a boxer and walks him in the morning and at night. As she walks, she stops and talks to people also out walking or who are working in their yards. She knows people all around our neighborhood, and she’s been key in bringing people together.

Who lives in your community? Who is being included and who is being excluded? Whose voices are loud, and whose voices are silent? What are their challenges? What are their needs? Who might you take a step toward to build or grow a friendship? Can you invite someone into your home or join a new friend in an activity you both enjoy?

  1. Reach out to your local college or university. Every year in the United States over one million international students come to study here. They attend small community colleges and large universities and often struggle to connect with people beyond their campuses.

According to one study, 40 percent of students report they have no close American friends. A statistic I’ve often heard quoted says that 80 to 90 percent of international students visiting the United States never enter an American home. The world is coming to our door, and we’re ignoring it.

  1. Connect with a coworker. Do you have a coworker whose race or cultural background differs from yours? Go out of your way to open up conversations and build a friendship.
  2. Host an exchange student. Our family hosted an exchange student from the Czech Republic the year after our first mission trip there. She lived in our home for nine months, during the school year. Andrea is forever considered one of our kids, and our family learned so much about her life and culture during her stay with us.
  3. Build family relationships with the families of kids on your child’s sports team or in their school. Make an effort to reach out to families whose children have similar ages and hobbies as yours. Most children naturally look beyond race and cultures when making friends, and we should follow their example.
  4. Try to understand another’s history. See your new friend as an individual and not a stereotype. And even if you mess up and commit a cultural faux pas, the relationship you’ve created will make it easier for both of you to laugh off your mistakes. One of my favorite books of recent years was The Warmth of Other Suns by Isabel Wilkerson. This book chronicles the decades-long migration of black citizens who fled the South for northern and western cities, in search of a better life. The stories shared were lovely, heartbreaking, and shocking.

Reading books like this has helped me understand the injustice and fear in my community and my country. The racial and socio-economic issues in the news today didn’t happen overnight. Instead, they are old issues that society has pushed under the surface for too long. Laws or government programs won’t fix them. They will only be solved by individual people changing and asking God to show them His heart. When our awareness of God’s heart for diversity and unity expands, we realize reconciliation is not someone else’s problem, but ours.

Unity within the body of Christ—and within our communities—isn’t something to tack on; it must become who we are. And what happens when we make this a priority? We become light to a dark world. A world that since the beginning of recorded history has been divided by race and social status.

Purchase a copy of Walk It Out. Awareness is the first step toward solving the problem.

Eight ways you can be the answer to the race problem from @TriciaGoyer

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Disclosure of Material Connection: Some of the links in the post above are “affiliate links.” This means if you click on the link and purchase the item, I will receive an affiliate commission. Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will add value to my readers. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.” Read full privacy policy here.

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Sometimes Love Grows {Adoption Hope}

Sometimes Love Grows

Sometimes Love Grows

In my 25 years as a mom there have been many homecomings as I brought my children home for the first times. When Cory was born, I was a 17-year-old single mom, and we returned to my parents’ house. With Leslie and Nathan, John and I lived in low-income housing while he was in school. There was no designer nursery, but I did have room for a bassinet next to our bed.

We adopted Alyssa as a baby. She was six days old, and we knew for two and a half months that she’d be coming. Yet again there was no nursery, no crib set, nor any wall hangings. We brought Alyssa home just a few days before our family moved 2,000 miles from Montana to Arkansas. The first days of getting acquainted with our new daughter were spent in the front of a U-Haul.

In 2013, we had another homecoming. We adopted five-year-old “Sissy” and two-year-old “Buddy” from the foster care system. Instead of two months of preparation, we had two days. Bunk beds were set up, and dresser drawers were filled with clothes, but how can you really prepare for two children who’ve faced trauma, lived in numerous homes, and have already set up walls around their hurting hearts? John and I had gone through months of training, but then there was the moment when there were two kids sitting in car seats in the back seat. Could we really do this? Would love come?

I’d like to say the love was instantaneous, but that’s the thing of fairy tales. When it comes to welcoming in new foster or adoptive kids sometimes love grows one day at a time. Love is a choice—a choice that’s made even in the middle of fits, or crying in the night, or anger that flows from gazes. Anger that other people caused, and anger that is now my job to ease.

Sometimes, love grows one day at a time #adoption @TriciaGoyer

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With my newborns, the love seemed to be instantaneous. With these older ones, it’s something that builds and grows. And that’s OK. Love is a verb. And a love that grows is just as beautiful as love that emerges.

Have you thought about adopting but question if you’ll be able to love them as much as your biological children? It’s a good question to ask.

Love may not happen within minutes or days, but when you give of your home, your family, and your heart . . . love finds its way in ordinary times and on ordinary days.

Sometimes Love Grows

Maybe you’ve been reading and wondering, could love grow in our hearts for another child? Maybe right now you’re feeling the whisper in your heart to learn more. I know that whisper. I know that feeling. That’s why I’m excited to be a speaker in the upcoming Adoption Summit. The Adoption Summit is completely online and a great way to get all your questions answered and more. Learn from educators, guest speakers, and parents just like you who wondered–is adoption for me?

Click HERE to get your FREE ticket!

Sometimes Love Grows

Here are other blogs I’ve written about our adoption journey:

How to Adopt for {Almost} Free

Choosing to Adopt: One Couple’s Story

Adoption {She Said}

Adoption {He Said}

The Sad News About Adoption in Our World

Meet the New Goyer Children (our announcement in 2013!)

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Disclosure of Material Connection: Some of the links in the post above are “affiliate links.” This means if you click on the link and purchase the item, I will receive an affiliate commission. Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will add value to my readers. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”

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Don’t Give Up Too Soon on Your Marriage

Tricia Goyer shares and encourages you don't give up too soon on your marriage!

Don’t Give Up Too Soon on Your Marriage

It’s not our anniversary, but a good marriage is worth celebrating. And the thing is, there was a time when I felt my feelings fade.

It was a busy season of homeschooling two teens and a pre-teen. John was working hard and serving in ministry. I was writing lots of books.

It’s not like either of us did anything wrong, it’s just that we didn’t give to the other person like we needed to. I still cared for John, and he cared for me, but it wasn’t the same spark.

The Truth About Marriage

The truth is married life doesn’t often resemble the giddy, can’t eat, can’t sleep feelings of those first romances. And it was my writer friends/prayer warriors who I confessed this to … and they prayed me through it.

As I laid in bed that night after the prayer, I pictured Jesus with me during my high school years. I’d been looking for love and remembering fondly the THRILL of dating, of being chosen. But when I imagined Jesus there, I saw sadness in his gaze because He had so much for me. He knew that those high school sparks would leave me empty. Instead, John was waiting–someone that was not all flash and empty promises. God had someone dedicated, steady, and loving for me–the man I married. The man I’d become discontent with.

The next morning I awoke with a renewed love for my husband. I also started pouring into our relationship day-by-day. I loved John in ways he longed to be loved, and he did the same to me.

Where has love taken us?

Our love has pulled us together, and it’s made it possible for us to open our home to seven more kids. If we hadn’t stuck it out so many lives would have been changed.

I used to think that big, major blowups were the things that broke marriages apart. Now I know different. It’s the drifting. It’s longing for rushes of emotions while ignoring dedication, commitment, and unconditional love.

If you know a couple who is in that fizzle place please pass this on–don’t give up too soon on your marriage. Marriage is worth fighting for. Instead of stepping away, step closer … even if you’re afraid of being hurt. It’s worth it for the other person. It’s worth it for all the other people who your marriage will impact.

Our promise to “love, honor and cherish” is one I’m happy I kept.

don't give up too soon on your marriage

#happy #love #marriage #family #celebration #love #happiness #forever#smiles #together #marriage #lifetogether #stickitout

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Allow God to Write Your Story

Allow God to Write Your Story

If you allow God to write your story–He will. So don’t be surprised when he shows up and shows off in a BIG way. That’s exactly what He did in my life, and I was so blessed by it.

The Gift of Friendship

To begin with, God has been so wonderful to give me a friend like Robin Gunn. She has been a mentor and confidant for many, many years. Being able to spend time with her is always a treat. But this week God did some wild, amazing stuff–like having Robin fly into Denver the same day I was there interviewing my Holocaust survivor friend Thomas. Not only that, but Robin’s son Ross was our amazing videographer!

allow God to write your story

Thomas was born a Jew in Czechoslavakia, and he was saved from the concentration camps by a kindertransport to the UK. After becoming a Christian, he attended Bible College in Glasgow, and one of the young men he prayed with often was a man named Brother Andrew. Years later, Brother Andrew smuggled thousands of Bibles into Eastern Europe.

A Call to the Czech Republic

Fast forward to 2008, I felt God’s call to go on a mission trip to the Czech Republic. It was life-changing. To tell you the truth, our family left part of our hearts there. We love the Czech Republic. That visit was the beginning of God doing many amazing things. He brought Czech friends into our lives, and he gave us an amazing foreign exchange student, Andrea, who we call our Czech daughter. We ended up taking a second trip there and our daughter Leslie went back for one month to visit Andrea.

On our first trip, we passed out Bibles on the street … little did I know–it was the very SAME town Robin had smuggled them into. As a young woman, Robin worked for Brother Andrew and even helped smuggle Bibles into Czechoslavakia. (Oh, yes she did!)

allow God to write your story

What I also didn’t know was that in 2008 Thomas had returned to the Czech Republic and was going around to schools and events sharing his story of finding Christ.

Allow God to Write Your Story

There’s no way we could have orchestrated this even if we tried. It’s a story that could only be developed by a MASTER WEAVER–God–the one who brought us together yesterday in Colorado!

God is always moving and every day you have the opportunity to allow God to write your story. While it won’t always be easy, it’s a journey that can give your life meaning and purpose. It’s also a beautiful journey, one that I’ve been on for some time now yet never fail to be inspired, moved, and awed by.

Friend, if you haven’t begun that journey I can only encourage you to take the leap. Take his hand and let Him lead you.

Allow God to write your story and be prepared for a wonderful ride.

Twice Rescued Child

Would you like to read the amazing story of how my friend Thomas was rescued and how God moved in his life? My novel Twice Rescued Child is available for order HERE.

You can also listen here to the podcast episode where I interview Thomas HERE.

Isn’t God amazing?!

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